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Today, 12:27 pmFuneral Expenses...
President Obama goes on a State visit to Israel. While he is on a tour of Jerusalem, he has a fatal heart attack.
The undertaker tells the US diplomats: "You can have him shipped home for $1 million or you can bury him here in the Holy Land for $100."
The US diplomats go into a huddle and come back to the undertaker.
They tell him they want Obama flown home.
The undertaker is puzzled and asks: "Why would you spend $1 million to get him home, when it would be wonderful to be buried here in this religious country and you would only spend $100?"
One diplomat replied: "More than 2000 years ago a man died here, was buried here, and just 3 days later he rose from the dead."
"We simply can't take that risk".
April 21, 2015, 6:37 pmJudge Napolitano...
Fox News senior judicial analyst Judge Andrew Napolitano said on "The Kelly File" Monday the allegations that former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton exchanged favors in return for donations to the Clinton Foundation are "truly <snip>ing."
He also said the Obama Justice Department must launch a criminal investigation.
Post Continues on dailycaller.com
Read more at http://patriotupdate.com/2015/04/judge-napolitano-bribery-allegations-against-hillary-clinton-are-truly-<snip>ing/
April 21, 2015, 6:36 pmObama...
ep. Steve King (R-IA) accused President Obama of "importing millions of illegal aliens" in order to stack the electorate with "undocumented Democrats" who will vote for his party.
"To put it simply, the President is importing millions of illegal aliens who, when they arrive here he thinks, and he's right, they are undocumented Democrats.
Post Continues on cnsnews.com
Read more at http://patriotupdate.com/2015/04/rep-king-obama-is-importing-millions-of-undocumented-democrats/
April 18, 2015, 8:20 pmMiss Kitty's prs wk 4-19
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April 14, 2015, 6:24 pmTax cheats...
The U.S. Justice Department issued a stern reminder on Monday that when it comes to income taxes, "no one is above the law or below the radar."
Check the rest out:
"With the annual tax filing deadline approaching on Wednesday, April 15, the Justice Department's Tax Division reminds U.S. taxpayers across the country and around the world of their obligation to file timely and accurate income tax returns," the news release said.
Post Continues on cnsnews.com
Read more at http://patriotupdate.com/2015/04/doj-singles-out-tax-cheats-in-a-pay-or-else-warning-to-taxpayers/
I want to know if this applies to Sharpton, too?
April 11, 2015, 8:26 pmMiss Kitty"s prs wk 4-12
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April 10, 2015, 1:41 pmThink of it as Smart Diplomacy for Dummies...
n all things Middle-East - and circus related, Andrew Klavan, explains Barack Obama's policy for that troubled region. Think of it as Smart Diplomacy for Dummies...
I'm Andrew Klavan and this is the Revolting Truth.
This is the Middle East.
This is the Middle East during the Obama administration.
Some of you may observe these results of Obama's smart diplomacy and think to yourself, "Whoa, this president's foreign policy looks like a clown car... full of those evil Stephen King clowns who live in the sewer and say eerie things to children then turn into a gigantic spider and devour them. While laughing maniacally."
Ah-ha, but if you said that, it's probably because you don't have the nuanced, subtle Obama-like intelligence to appreciate the subtle nuances and nuanced subtleties with which Obama's smart diplomacy has transformed this troubled region.
I wish it would stop doing that.
You see, during the non-smart George W. Bush administration, Bush's reckless cowboy policies dragged the United States into ceaselessly supporting our friends while attacking our enemies. [snorts] Any idiot could come up with that strategy!
Now as best we can, given our non-Obama non smartness, let's try to comprehend the ever-so-subtle subtlety of the nuanced nuances of Obama's smarter-than-smart smart diplomacy approach and see just how smartly smart his smart diplomacy is.
When uprisings began in the Middle East at the end of 2010, the media dubbed them the Arab Spring � after the famous deodorant, I think. Smart Obama cleverly defied expectations by withdrawing support from our ally Hosni Mubarak, and backing the Muslim Brotherhood, who want us all dead. Which was smart! Because the Egyptian military then replaced the repressive brotherhood with President Abdel Fattah al-Sisi - who courageously stood up against Islamic extremism. So Obama abandoned him as well.
Meanwhile, in Syria, when opposition arose against the tyrant Bashar al-Assad � Obama declared "Assad must go," and backed it up with a quick round of 18 holes at Grande Oaks. When Assad then unleashed brutal attacks on his own people, Obama drew a red line against Assad's use of chemical weapons and then erased it when Assad used chemical weapons.
Now by this time, George W. Bush's surge of troops had so completely won the war in Iraq that Vice President Biden was claiming the Iraq victory as one of Obama's major accomplishments. Only a man as smart as our president could think to wrong-foot our defeated enemies by suddenly surrendering to them. This took the murderous Islamists so completely off-guard that they quickly conquered the entire region, giving control of it to ISIS, who want us all dead.
But don't worry. Obama then decided to fight ISIS by sending our Air Force to support attacks on ISIS by the Iranians... who want us all dead.
But that's okay because we're also opposing the Iranians in Yemen where our defense of the government against Iran-backed extremists was declared by the administration to be a total success after it completely failed.
But thank goodness our successful opposition to Iran in Yemen was a failure, because now it won't jeopardize Obama's deal to let Iran make nuclear weapons... so they can destroy Israel... whom we hate because they're our friends.
Now, see, you and I can't even begin to understand the subtle... nuanced... nuanced... subtleties of Obama's over-arching strategy here. While we're just focusing on one disaster after another, Obama in his smart smartness takes the global view.
That can't be good.
I'm Andrew Klavan with the Revolting Truth.
April 7, 2015, 6:40 pmThe Baptist Cowboy...
A cowboy, who just moved to Wyoming from Texas, walks into a bar and orders three mugs of Bud.
He sits in the back of the room, drinking a sip out of each one in turn.
When he finishes them, he comes back to the bar and orders three more.
The bartender approaches and tells the cowboy, "You know, a mug goes flat after I draw it. It would taste better if you bought one at a time."
The cowboy replies, "Well, you see, I have two brothers. One is an Airborne Ranger, the other is a Navy Seal, both serving overseas somewhere. When we all left our home in Texas, we promised that we'd drink this way to remember the days when we drank together. So I'm drinking one beer for each of my brothers and one for myself."
The bartender admits that this is a nice custom, and leaves it there.
The cowboy becomes a regular in the bar, and always drinks the same way.
He orders three mugs and drinks them in turn.
One day, he comes in and only orders two mugs.
All the regulars take notice and fall silent.
When he comes back to the bar for the second round, the bartender says, "I don't want to intrude on your grief, but I wanted to offer my condolences on your loss."
The cowboy looks quite puzzled for a moment, then a light dawns in his eyes and he laughs.
"Oh, no, everybody's just fine," he explains,
"It's just that my wife and I joined the Baptist Church and I had to quit drinking."
"Hasn't affected my brothers though...."
April 4, 2015, 8:00 pmMiss Kitty's prs. wk 4-5
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April 4, 2015, 6:21 pmIllegals and TB..
On Friday, Arizona Rep. Paul Gosar, along with Rep. Ann Kirkpatrick (D-AZ) and Senators John McCain (R-AZ) and Jeff Flake (R-AZ), sent a letter to DHS Secretary Jeh Johnson and ICE Deputy Assistant Secretary Salda�a warning them not to release an illegal immigrant with drug-resistant tuberculosis into the general public.
"I was alarmed when I was forwarded a letter written by Pinal County Director of Public Health Thomas Schryer indicating that the ICE Detention facility in Florence is planning on releasing an illegal immigrant with drug resistant tuberculosis into the Pinal County Community in the next couple days," Gosar said in a statement. "I demand ICE and DHS rethink this awful decision and not release this dangerous individual. Such actions put our citizens at risk and will impose significant financial burdens on the County."
Dr. Thomas Schryer, Director of Public Health for Pinal County, wrote a letter explaining his concerns about releasing the detained illegal immigrant, who has been receiving treatment for seven months for his tuberculosis. "Tuberculosis is a very dangerous disease that can spread easily, due to the public health threat Arizona Revised Statutes and good public health practice dictates that we provide healthcare to treat tuberculosis for anyone residing in our county (other than those incarcerated) as a result when the ICE facility releases this individual he will be treated at the local tax payers' expense," he stated. "From a public health perspective it is essential that anyone who is suffering from TB be treated so they are not a health threat to others, I request that ICE pay the costs of those who are released from their facility."
March 31, 2015, 7:52 pmA Cow Runs Into the Road ...
A Cow Runs Into the Road
Suddenly, a cow runs out into the road, and a limo driving late at night,
hits it head-on....And the car comes to a stop.
The woman in the back seat - in her usual abrasive manner, says to the
Chauffeur, "You get out and check on that poor cow. You were driving."
So the chauffeur gets out, checks, and reports that the animal is
dead, but It appeared to be very old. Well, says the woman,
"You were driving, so you go and tell the farmer in that lighted
farmhouse Over there."
Two hours later the chauffeur returns totally inebriated, a full
belly, his Hair ruffled, and A big grin on his face. "My God, what
happened to you?" asks the woman.
The chauffeur replies, "When I got there, the farmer opened his best
bottle of single malt scotch, The Wife gave me a meal fit for a king,
and the daughter made love to me."
"What on earth did you say?" asks the woman.
Well, I just knocked on the door, and when it opened, I said to them,
"I'm Nancy Pelosi's chauffeur, and I've just killed the old cow."
Don't you just love a story with a happy ending.
March 28, 2015, 8:31 pmMiss Kitty's prs. wk 3-29
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March 28, 2015, 6:17 pm50 Shades of Barack Obama...
If Barack Obama doesn't love America, then why is he beating the crap out of her? That's the question our host and voracious reader, Andrew Klavan, explores in this review of the steamy new book 50 SHADES OF BARACK OBAMA.
I'm Andrew Klavan and this is the Revolting Truth.
Does Barack Obama love America?
Oh wait, sorry, that's supposed to be a serious question. You see, after years of bad government and high-level corruption, people are beginning to wonder whether this president actually has affection for our country.
In an effort to get at the Revolting Truth, we have exclusively uncovered a document that tells the complete story of Obama's relationship with the U.S. It's called "50 Shades of Barack Obama." Here's a summary of the contents:
When she first met 50 Shades of Barack Obama, America was just a shy, homely greatest country on earth who had done nothing with her life but free most of the globe from tyranny while becoming the most powerful engine of wealth and innovation the world had ever known. So of course she was drawn instantly to the charismatic Obama, a handsome and politically brilliant mystery man who had parlayed identity politics into a successful career of doing absolutely nothing.
"I love you, America," said 50 Shades of Barack Obama, "and so I'm going to fundamentally transform you into something else."
"Oh jeezy-peezy," said America, biting her lip seductively. "But if you love me, why would you want to fundamentally transform me?"
50 Shades of Barack Obama gazed wistfully into the middle distance. "I had a very sad childhood raised by Communists and America haters," he said. "Now just sign this contract where I get to be president and dominate you completely, and then I'll show you my Red Room."
"Golly Moses!" sighed America, "why is it called the Red Room?"
"Because the things I do to you in there are going to leave some Marx," said Obama, who had a lame sense of humor.
In the Red Room, 50 Shades of Barack Obama brought out some terrifying equipment America had never seen before. "First," he said, "I'm going to increase the national debt by 8-trillion dollars."
"Holy smokes, that really hurts," America cried out. "But wait, in 2008, you said it was unpatriotic of George W. Bush to raise the debt only 4-trillion. That means your own words prove you don't really love me."
"If I didn't love you," said Barack Obama, panting heavily. "Would I be beating the crap out of you like this?"
"Oh, jinkies, good point," said America and signed the same contract for another four years.
"Next," said 50 Shades of Barack Obama, "I'm going to surrender George W. Bush's victory in Iraq and let savage terrorists take over territory we used to control while allowing Iran, the world's worst state sponsor of terrorism, to acquire nuclear capabilities."
"Goshagorry, my quivering flesh is in agony," said America. "But if you love me, 50 Shades of Barack, why would you empower the Islamist maniacs who've sworn to destroy me?"
"Because it turns me on to see you completely submissive," said 50 Shades of Barack Obama. "And that's why I'm going to engineer unAmerican government takeovers of health care and the internet while corrupting the IRS and the Justice Department for my own leftist political purposes."
"That's enough!" America cried out. "I don't think a real patriot would dominate and hurt the country he loves. The next time I fall for a president it's not going to be a man who controls and hurts me. In fact, it may not be a man at all. I may run off with that woman Hillary standing over there... in the black leather body suit... holding that whip. Oh jeeze!"
I'm Andrew Klavan with the Revolting Truth
March 25, 2015, 6:33 pmArmy Sgt. Bowe Bergdahl...
Bowe Bergdahl could spend the rest of his life in prison after being charged with desertion and misbehavior before the enemy, the U.S. Army announced Wednesday.
Bergdahl was charged with Article 85 of the Uniform Code of Military Justice, "desertion with intent to shirk important or hazardous duty," and with Article 99, "misbehavior before the enemy by endangering the safety of a command, unit or place."
The desertion charge carries a maximum potential punishment of dishonorable discharge, reduction to E-1 rank, total forfeiture of all pay and up to five years in prison. The more serious misbehavior before the enemy charge carries a possible penalty of confinement for life.
Bergdahl disappeared from his Afghanistan base in 2009 and was subsequently held captive by the Taliban-allied Haqqani network in Pakistan. He was freed from captivity last year in exchange for five Taliban commanders being held at Guantanamo Bay.
Read more at http://patriotupdate.com/2015/03/bowe-bergdahl-to-be-charged-with-desertion/
March 22, 2015, 11:35 pmBeware of Obama...
srael: Beware of Obama
Ny Post ^ | 3/22/15 | MICHAEL GOODWIN
Posted on 3/22/2015, 1:28:34 PM by GrandJediMasterYoda
Israel: Beware of Obama
By Michael Goodwin
First he comes for the banks and health care, uses the IRS to go after critics, politicizes the Justice Department, spies on journalists, tries to curb religious freedom, slashes the military, throws open the borders, doubles the debt and nationalizes the Internet. He lies to the public, ignores the Constitution, inflames race relations and urges Latinos to punish Republican "enemies." He abandons our �allies, appeases tyrants, coddles �adversaries and uses the Crusades as an excuse for inaction as Islamist terrorists slaughter their way across the Mideast. Now he's coming for Israel.
(Excerpt) Read more at nypost.com ...