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ochoop17's Blog

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Yesterday, 9:00 amA quarter and A Dime

Place a quarter and a dime in the middle of a table. Can you take the dime and place it under the quarter without touching the quarter with anything at all? How?

Entry #2,238
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June 17, 2013, 9:58 amDrop Dead

Six retired Irishmen were playing poker in Monaghan's  flat in Dungarvan when Sean O'Toole loses €700 on a single hand, clutches his chest and drops dead at the table.

Showing respect for their fallen  brother, the other five continue playing standing up. Michael Lennon looks around and asks, 'Oh, me boys, someone's got to tell Sean's wife. Who will it be?'

They draw straws.  Cavan Colquhoun picks  the short one.  They tell him to be discreet and gentle and not to make a bad situation any worse. 'Discreet? I'm the most discreet Irishmen you'll ever meet. Discretion is my middle name. Leave it to me', announces Cavan.

He goes over to O'Toole's  house and knocks on the door.  Brenda O'Toole answers and asks what he wants. Cavan declares: 'Your husband just lost €700 and is afraid to come home.'

'Tell him to drop dead!'  snarls Brenda. 'I'll go tell him.' says Cavan.

Entry #2,237
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June 16, 2013, 11:08 amFill In The Blanks

June 15, 1902: __________, an express passenger train between New York and ______, begins service.

Entry #2,236
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June 15, 2013, 11:44 amWho Am I ?

A comedian to both man and child
When it's time to play, I'm known to be wild.
I am recognized because of my looks
I'm not a comic when in comic books.

Entry #2,235
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June 14, 2013, 10:46 amDid You Hear..

Q: Did you hear about the race between the lettuce and the tomato?
A: The lettuce was a "head" and the tomato was trying to "ketchup"!

Entry #2,234
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June 13, 2013, 12:07 pmFill In The Blanks

June 12, 1939: Byron ______ wins the U.S. Open in a three-way playoff with Craig_____ and Denny _______.

Entry #2,233
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June 12, 2013, 10:22 amWhat Am I ?

When young, I am sweet in the sun. When middle-aged, I make you happy. When old, I am valued more than ever.

Entry #2,232
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June 11, 2013, 9:51 amWhy Is It ?

Why is it that when you transport something by car, it's called shipment but when you transport something by ship it's called cargo?

Entry #2,231
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June 10, 2013, 10:14 amFill In The Blanks

June 9, 19--: The federal government begins withholding ________ from paychecks.

Entry #2,230
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June 9, 2013, 11:52 amWho Am I ?

At the sound of me, men may dream
Or stamp their feet,
At the sound of me, women may laugh
Or sometimes weep. Who am I?

Entry #2,229
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June 8, 2013, 11:42 amGold Medal Winner

Tom, the Commonwealth Gold Medal runner, was on his way to a bar with some friends.

At the door, the bouncer turned to him and said “Sorry, mate, you can’t come in here – no denim.”

Tom was quite annoyed at this and retorted, “Don’t you know who I am? I’m Tom, the gold medal winner in 400m .”

“Then it won’t take you long to run home and change, will it?” replied the bouncer

Entry #2,228
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June 7, 2013, 11:58 amFill In The Blanks

June 6,1933: The first ______movie theater is opened by Richard _______ in Camden County.

Entry #2,227
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June 6, 2013, 12:03 pmWhat Falls..

What falls, but does not break, and what breaks but does not fall?

Entry #2,226
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June 5, 2013, 11:11 amTwo Young Boys

Two young boys walk into a pharmacy one day, pick out a box of Tampax and proceed to the checkout counter. The man at the counter asks the older boy, "Son, how old are you?"  "Eight," the boy replies. The man continues, "Do you know what these are used for?  "Not exactly," the boy says. "But they aren't for me. They're my brother – he's four. We saw on TV that if you use these you would be able to swim and ride a bike. Right now he can't do either one."

Entry #2,225
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June 4, 2013, 11:14 amFill In the Blanks

June 3, 1965: Astronaut ___________ becomes the first American to walk  in space during the flight of _______.

Entry #2,224
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