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ochoop17's Blog

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Today, 10:32 amHow did he do it?

  A thief enters a shop and threatens the clerk, forcing him to open the safe. The clerk says, "The code for the safe is different every day, and if you hurt me you'll never get the code". But the thief manages to guess the code on his own.

How did he do it?

Entry #2,697
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Yesterday, 9:38 amDeep Devotion

A tom cat and a tabby cat were courting on a back fence
one night. The tom leaned over to the tabby with pent up passion and
purred: "I'll die for you!" The tabby gazed at him from under
lowered eyelids and asked: "How many times?"

Entry #2,696
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October 19, 2014, 12:01 pmWhat Am I ?

Some will use me while others will not some have remembered while others have forgot. For profit or gain I"m used expertly I can"t be picked off the ground or tossed into the sea. Only gained from patience and time can you unravel my rhyme?"

Entry #2,695
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October 18, 2014, 11:43 amA Grasshopper

A grasshopper walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The bar tender turns to the grasshopper and says " hey, you know we have a drink named after you?"

The grasshopper responds "why in the heck do you have a drink named Bob?"

Entry #2,694
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October 17, 2014, 12:20 pmWhat Runs..

What Runs Through The City Without Moving?

Entry #2,693
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October 16, 2014, 10:44 amThe Doctor..

The doctor gave a man six months to live. The man couldn't pay his bill, so the doctor gave him another six months

Entry #2,692
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October 15, 2014, 11:05 amI Hated It..

I hated it when my old aunties used to poke and prod me on weddings saying , you're next.

However they stopped, when I started doing the same to them at funerals.

Entry #2,691
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October 14, 2014, 1:22 pmWho Am I ?

I am a six letter word. Subtract one letter and twelve will remain. Who am I?

Entry #2,690
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October 13, 2014, 8:20 amWhen Asked..

When asked by a young patrol officer, "Do you know you were speeding?" The 83-year-old woman talked herself out of a ticket by stating, "Yes, but I had to get there before I forgot where I was going."

Entry #2,689
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October 12, 2014, 11:47 amWhat Can..

What can you hold without ever touching it?

Entry #2,688
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October 11, 2014, 1:04 pmWill You Remember Me?

Bob: "Will you remember me tomorrow?" 

Bill: "Yes"

Bob "Will you remember me next week?" 

Bill  "Yes"

Bob:  "Will you remember me next month??"

Bill:  "Yes"

Bob:  "Will you remember me next year?"

Bill:  "Yeah"

Bob:  "Knock Knock"

Bill:  "Who's There?"

Bob:  "See, you forgot me already!"

Entry #2,687
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October 10, 2014, 9:23 amWhat Is..

What is the shortest month?

Entry #2,686
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October 9, 2014, 12:15 pmWhat Happen..

Q: What happens when you cross a librarian and a lawyer?
A: You get all the information you want, but you can't understand it.

Entry #2,685
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October 8, 2014, 9:35 amWhat Am I ?

With no wings, I fly. With no eyes, I see. With no arms, I climb. More frightening than any beast, stronger than any foe. I am cunning, ruthless, and tall; in the end, I rule all. What am I?

Entry #2,684
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October 7, 2014, 8:17 amA Texan Walk..

A Texan walks into a pub in Ireland and clears his voice to the crowd of drinkers. He says, “I hear you Irish are a bunch of hard drinkers. I’ll give $500 American dollars to anybody in here who can drink 10 pints of Guinness back-to-back.”

The room is quiet, and no one takes up the Texan’s offer. One man even leaves.

Thirty minutes later the same gentleman who left shows back up and taps the Texan on the shoulder. “Is your bet still good?” asks the Irishman.

The Texan says yes and asks the bartender to line up 10 pints of Guinness. Immediately the Irishman tears into all 10 of the pint glasses, drinking them all back-to-back.

The other pub patrons cheer as the Texan sits in amazement. The Texan gives the Irishman the $500 and says, “If ya don’t mind me askin’, where did you go for that 30 minutes you were gone?”

The Irishman replies, “Oh… I had to go to the pub down the street to see if I could do it first.”

Entry #2,683
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