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ochoop17's Blog

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Today, 12:16 pmA Lonely Frog

A lonely frog, desperate for some form of company telephoned the Psychic Hotline to find out what his future holds. His Personal Psychic Advisor tells him, "You are going to meet a beautiful young girl who will want to know everything about you."

The frog is thrilled and says, "This is great! Where will I meet her, at work, at a party?"

"No" says the psychic, "in a Biology class."

Entry #2,785
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Yesterday, 2:44 pmWho Is..

Your mother’s brother’s only brother-in-law is asleep on your couch. Who is asleep on your couch?

Entry #2,784
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January 23, 2015, 10:29 amPraying At The Wall

A female CNN journalist heard about a very old Jewish man who had been going to the Western Wall to pray, twice a day, every day, for a long, long time.

So she went to check it out. She went to the Western Wall and there he was, walking slowly up to the holy site.

She watched him pray and after about 45 minutes, when he turned to leave, using a cane and moving very slowly, she approached him for an interview.

“Pardon me, sir, I’m Rebecca Smith from CNN. What’s your name?

“Morris Feinberg,” he replied.

“Sir, how long have you been coming to the Western Wall and praying?”

“For about 60 years.”

“60 years! That’s amazing! What do you pray for?”

“I pray for peace between the Christians, Jews and the Muslims.”

“I pray for all the wars and all the hatred to stop.”

“I pray for all our children to grow up safely as responsible adults and to love their fellow man.”

“I pray that politicians tell us the truth and put the interests of the people ahead of their own interests.”

“How do you feel after doing this for 60 years?”

“Like I’m talking to a wall.”

Entry #2,783
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January 22, 2015, 12:41 pmWhat Does..

What does this mean? . . . . . . . .
Entry #2,782
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January 21, 2015, 10:24 amMy Uncle..

"My uncle ran for Senate last year."

"Really? What does he do now?"

"Nothing. He got elected."

Entry #2,781
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January 20, 2015, 10:10 amWhat Does..

What does this mean? . . . . . . . .

Entry #2,780
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January 20, 2015, 10:09 amWhat Does..

What does this mean? . . . . . . . .

Entry #2,779
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January 19, 2015, 12:15 pmTwo Turtles

Did you hear about the snail that got beat up by two turtles?
At the police station they asked him, “Did you get a good look at the turtles that did this? He said, “No, it all happened so fast.”

Entry #2,778
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January 18, 2015, 12:58 pmWhich Would..

Q: Which would be better, an old 10 dollar bill or a new one?
A: An old 10 because, 10 is worth more than 1!

Entry #2,777
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January 17, 2015, 10:32 amWhat Do...

What do you get if you mix a car, a fly, and a dog?

Entry #2,776
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January 15, 2015, 12:25 pmShe Pregnant

The brunette had been married about a year. One day the she came running up to her husband, jumping for joy. He didn't know how to react, so he started jumping up and down along with her.

"Why are we so happy?" he asked.

She said, "Honey, I have some really great news for you!"

"Great" he said, "tell me what you're so happy about."

She stopped, breathless from all the jumping up and down "I'm pregnant!" she gasped.

The husband was ecstatic as they had been trying for quite a while. He grabbed her, and kissed her

"Wow, that is wonderful," "I couldn't be happier!"

Then she said, "Oh, honey there's more."

"What do you mean more?", he asked.

"Well we are not having just one baby, we are going to have TWINS!"

He was amazed at how she could know so soon after getting pregnant "How do you that," he asked.

"It was easy," she said."I went to the pharmacy and bought the 2 pack home pregnancy test kit."

"Both tests came out positive!"

Entry #2,775
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January 14, 2015, 8:55 amWhat Is He ?

If a man were born in Greece, raised in Spain, came to America, and died in San Francisco, what is he?

Entry #2,774
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January 13, 2015, 10:46 amWhy Was...

Why was Cinderella so lousy at baseball? Who could blame her, she had a pumpkin for a coach and was always running from the ball!

Entry #2,773
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January 12, 2015, 9:47 amWho Am I ?

I am a seven letter word. I am very heavy. Take away two letters from me and you will get 8. Take away one letter from me and you will get 80. Who am I?

Entry #2,772
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January 11, 2015, 12:44 pmA Florida Couple..

A Florida couple was arrested for having sex on top of a car at a dealership. Apparently the man had always wanted to test drive a model that had been around the block a few times.

Entry #2,771
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