Coin Toss's Blog
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November 22, 2015, 12:23 amTolerance
Jiggs McDonald, NHL Hall of Fame broadcaster speaking in Ontario,says:
"I am truly perplexed that so many of my friends are against another mosque being built in Toronto. I think it should be the goal of every Canadian to be tolerant regardless of their religious beliefs.
Thus the mosque should be allowed, in an effort to promote tolerance."
"That is why I also propose that two nightclubs be opened next door to the mosque; thereby promoting tolerance from within the mosque.
We could call one of the clubs, which would be gay, "The Turban Cowboy," and the other, a topless bar, would be called "You Mecca Me Hot."
"Next door should be a butcher shop that specializes in pork, and adjacent to that an open-pit barbecue pork restaurant, called "Iraq of Ribs."
"Across the street there could be a lingerie store called "Victoria Keeps Nothing Secret," with sexy mannequins in the window modeling the goods.", and on the other side a liquor store called "Morehammered."
"All of this would encourage Muslims to demonstrate the tolerance they demand of us." Yes we should promote tolerance, and you can do your part by passing this on."
And if you are not laughing or smiling at this point...
It is either past your bedtime, or it's midnight at the oasis.
November 18, 2015, 8:55 amSteven Wright
He's the very dead pan comedian who said a mime lived upstairs so at night he'd put a blank cassette in his cassette player and played it to drive the mime nuts.
Here's some more:
If you're not familiar with the work of Steven Wright, he's the famous erudite scientist who once said: "I woke up one morning, and all of my stuff had been stolen and replaced by exact duplicates".
His mind sees things differently than most of us do. Here are some of his gems:
1 - I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.
2 - Borrow money from pessimists -- they don't expect it
3 - Half the people you know are below average.
4 - 99% of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
5 - 82.7% of all statistics are made up on the spot.
6 - A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.
7 - A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
8 - If you want the rainbow, you've got to put up with the rain.
9 - All those who believe in psycho kinesis, raise my hand.
10 - The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
11 - I almost had a psychic girlfriend... But she left me before we met.
12 - OK, so what's the speed of dark?
13 - How do you tell when you're out of invisible ink?
14 - If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
15 - Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
16 - When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
17 - Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.
18 - Hard work pays off in the future; laziness pays off now.
19 - I intend to live forever... So far, so good.
20 - If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
21 - Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
22 - What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
23 - My mechanic told me, "I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder."
24 - Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?
25 - If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
26 - A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
27 - Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
28 - The hardness of the butter is proportional to the softness of the bread.
29 - To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.
30 - The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.
31 - The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch up.
32 - The colder the x-ray table, the more of your body is required to be on it.
33 - Everyone has a photographic memory; some just don't have film.
34 - If your car could travel at the speed of light, would your headlights work?
November 10, 2015, 6:43 pmGuy sitting at a bar
A guy sits down at the bar, ordering drink after drink.
"Is everything okay, pal?" the bartender asks.
"My wife and I got into a fight and she announced she wasn't speaking to me for a month!"
Trying to put a positive spin on things, the bartender says, "Well, maybe that's kind of a good thing. You know, a little peace and quiet?"
"Yeah, I know. And today's the last day!"
November 10, 2015, 11:28 amHusband and wife speak
I can't believe that you've been visiting prostitutes for sex," screamed the wife. "I'm really disappointed."
"You can hardly blame me," he answered. "It's not like I was getting any from you."
"Well that's your fault," she replied. "You never told me you were willing to pay for it"
November 4, 2015, 8:58 pm46 Senators willing to let the UN disarm you
"CALLS FOR MEMBER STATES TO SUPPORT WEAPONS COLLECTION and DISARMAMENT of all UN countries".
By a 53-46 vote - The U.S. Senate voted against the U.N. resolution. HOORAY.
This is that brief, glorious moment in history when everyone stands around...reloading.
Now, which 46 Senators voted to destroy us? Well, let their names become known ! See below . If you vote in one of the states listed with these 46 "legis..traitors"... vote against them.
In a 53-46 vote, the Senate narrowly passed a measure that will stop the United States from entering into the United Nations Arms Trade Treaty.
The Statement of Purpose from the Senate Bill reads: "To uphold Second Amendment rights and prevent the United States from entering into the United Nations Arms Trade Treaty." The U.N. Small Arms Treaty, which has been championed by the Obama Administration, would have effectively placed a global ban on the import and export of small firearms. The ban would have affected all private gun owners in the U.S. and had language that would have implemented an international gun registry, now get this, on all private guns and ammo.
Astonishingly, 46 out of our 100 United States Senators were willing to give away our Constitutional rights to a foreign power.
Here are the 46 senators who voted to give your rights to the U.N.:
Folks, this needs to go viral. These Senators voted to let the UN take OUR guns. They need to lose their next election. We have been betrayed.
46 Senators Voted to Give your 2nd Amendment Constitutional Rights to the U.N.
Please, Send this to SOMEONE .....
I joined a support group for procrastinators. We haven't met yet!
Last Edited: November 4, 2015, 11:54 pm
October 31, 2015, 11:29 amBest video of the year
Received this in e-mail, have some tissues ready:
Subject: Best video of the year.
Amazing....you won't know what it's about, til the end...
October 31, 2015, 12:07 amRare facts about WW II
Rare facts about World War II
The first German serviceman killed in the war was killed by the Japanese.
Over 100,000 Allied bomber crewmen were killed over Europe.
More U.S. servicemen died in the Air Corps then the Marine Corps.
Polish Catholic midwife Stanislawa Leszczynska delivered 3,000 babies at the Auschwitz concentration camp during the Holocaust in occupied Poland.
In World War II, British soldiers got a ration of three sheets of toilet paper a day. Americans got 22.
In 1941, more than three million cars were manufactured in the United States. Only 139 more were made during the entire war.
Four of every five German soldiers killed in the war died on the Eastern Front
Only 20 percent of the males born in the Soviet Union in 1923 survived the war.
In World War II, the youngest serviceman in the United States military was Calvin Graham - age 12. Graham lied about his age when he enlisted in the US Navy. His real age was not discovered until after he was wounded. (Unbelievable)
Only one out of every four men serving on U-boats survived.
The Siege of Stalingrad resulted in more Russian deaths (military and civilian) than the United States and Britain sustained (combined) in all of World War II.
To avoid using the German sounding name 'hamburger' during World War II, Americans used the name 'Liberty Steak.'
Adolf Hitler's nephew, William Hitler, served in the US Navy during World War II.
Adolph Hitler and Henry Ford each kept a framed picture of the other on his desk.
During World War II, the largest Japanese spy ring was actually located in Mexico.
The mortality rate for POWs in Russian camps was 85 percent.
Had it been necessary for a third atom bomb, the city targeted would have been Tokyo.
An Imperial Japanese Army intelligence officer, who fought in World War II. Hiroo Onoda never surrendered in 1945. Until 1974, for almost 30 years, he held his position in the Philippines. His former commander traveled from Japan to personally issue orders relieving him from duty in 1974. (???)
Total casualties for World War II totaled between 50 - 70 million people, 80 percent of which came from only four countries - Russia, China, Germany and Poland.
Over 50 percent of the casualties were civilians, with the majority of those being women and children.
October 24, 2015, 12:31 amA quote among quotes!
"America will never be destroyed from the outside. If we falter and lose our freedoms, it will be because we destroyed ourselves."
� Abraham Lincoln
October 20, 2015, 5:17 pmWhat Did I learn from Watching the Democratic Debate
(Received in e-mail)
What did I learn from watching the Democratic Debate?
1. Black Lives Matter, All Lives Don't Matter.
2. College is worthless because it will soon be free.
3. Medical treatment is worthless because it will soon be free.
4. To become an American Citizen is worthless as it will soon be free.
5. The economy sucks and after 7 years in office, it's not Obama's fault.
6. The Middle Class is shrinking and after 7 years in office, it's not Obama's fault.
7. The Average Family income is dropping and after 7 years in office, it's not Obama's fault.
8. Black youths have over a 50% unemployment rate and after 7 years in office it's not Obama's fault.
9. Hispanic youth unemployment is over 35% and after 7 years in office, it's not Obama's fault.
10. 50% of the Population is paying 100% of all the taxes and they are still not paying their fair share.
11. Everyone who votes Democrat will work less, make more, get more time off, spend more time with family pay less taxes and get more government subsidies.
12. Everyone else does it, so should we, regardless of the results other places.
13. Government wants more money to squander on promises already broken.
14. The word "Progressive" is the less cringe worthy than saying you're a Liberal.
15. When America grows up, we want to be Norway, Sweden or the Netherlands.
16. There's a quagmire in Iraq, Syria and the Middle East and Obama's retreating from the area has nothing to do with the situation.
17. Republicans want dirty air, dirty water, oil spills, trash on the streets, polluted oceans, old people without medical treatment and dead, young people without educations being paid the lowest wages possible, starving children, don't believe in equal rights, were responsible for Jim Crow Laws and not Affirmative action,
18. Snowden and General Petraeus broke laws for releasing and not securing secret documents but Hillary Clinton shares no responsibility.
19. Marijuana cures all diseases.
20. Marijuana smokers are being imprisoned for smoking a joint.
21. Everything is rainbows and Unicorns.
22. Hillary Clinton does walk on water.
23. Cheaters do prosper.
24. People cheer stupidity.
25. There are only 2 candidates given a voice in the Democratic Race.
26. Hillary and Bill Clinton were born poor Black Children.
27. All the qualifications needed to be President is to be a woman.
28. Evil looks like anything white, rich, successful and productive.
29. You will receive a participation trophy in life.
30. Agreements of any kind should be signed and committed to even if the other agreeing party doesn't live up to its obligations.
31. Everything is still Bush's fault.
Last Edited: October 20, 2015, 7:38 pm
October 19, 2015, 9:19 pmRe: Haters
It's pretty rich when we have someone who constantly rates other peoples thread as 1 star when said rater doesn't even comment in those threads. I'd say rating threads as 1 star just because you don't like whoever put up the OP is being a hater.
You're not the only who rates 1 star but most people who do it base it on the topic or the content, not just for spite.
Yeah pickone I'm talking about you.
You refer to the MM and PB websites to 'prove' there are only 4 states that win.....while a variety of states are listed. Maybe you should take another look at those pages.
I also guess you haven't caught on yet that when you lock your blog posts they get buried very quickly.
I'll block you from my blog but only because I know you wouldn't post a reply that made any sense.
October 13, 2015, 11:08 amHilarious advice
Dump the male flight attendants. No one wanted them in the first place.
Replace all the female flight attendants with YOUNG good-looking strippers.
They don't even serve food anymore, so what's the loss.
The strippers would at least triple the alcohol sales and get a "party atmosphere" going in the cabin. And, of course, every businessman in this country would start flying again, hoping to see naked women. Because of the tips, female flight attendants wouldn't need a salary, thus saving even more money.
Muslims would be afraid to get on the planes for fear of seeing naked women.
Hijackings would come to a screeching halt, and the airline industry would see record revenues.
This is definitely a win - win situation if we handle it right -- a golden opportunity to turn a liability into an asset.
Why didn't Bush or Obama think of this?
Why do I still have to do everything myself?
October 10, 2015, 7:44 pmDo you know why?
(Received in e-mail)
Congressman Trey Gowdy (RC) (Trumps choice for Attorney General if elected President) turned
the tables on the media and asked them questions about Benghazi. The silence was deafening. Best video clip I have seen in months. I hope you watch it, it's only 3 minutes. The Media should be
embarrassed by Congressman Trey Gowdy ' s questions. This is most certainly the most embarrassing event that has occurred in the last 16 months. The burden falls on the media who
have not done anything to investigate this.
After viewing this 3.5 minute video, I urge you to forward it to your friends.
Do you know why?
Last Edited: October 10, 2015, 7:58 pm
October 7, 2015, 7:51 pmWisdom from Vernon Howard - Sanity
"Sanity in the atmosphere strikes an insane mind as being odd
and uncomfortable. The strangeness forces it to try to switch
the atmosphere over to its own insane nature. But since this
is impossible, the insane mind turns hateful toward the sanity
and also, of course, falls into self-torment."
A Treasury of Trueness, # 955
This certainly brought some posts here on LP to mind.
September 30, 2015, 7:39 pmStrict gun control works so good...
More than 50 people shot for second week in row-Chicago?
September 29, 2015, 7:48 pm1977 Stanford Yearbook entry
1977 Stanford Yearbook
VALERIE JARRETT. 1977 Stanford yearbook
Here is the lead fox in the house. This one gets to whisper in the kings ear many times a day.
I'd like to draw your attention to the small print next to Valerie's name. While attending Stanford University.
ponder and re-ponder what she boldly stated way back in 1977 ".......using freedom of religion in America against itself."
AND guess what....that is exactly what she and her Muslim czars have, and are doing as we sleep.
VALERIE JARRETT - The Top Muslim in the Top Power Seat - Obama's TOP ADVISOR.
Yes ladies and gentlemen, THIS is Obama's top advisor.
Seems as if his promise to fundamentally change America is in full swing. Had enough yet?
Last Edited: September 29, 2015, 7:49 pm