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November 21, 2015, 5:45 pmUnderstanding engineers.
From an email:
*Understanding Engineers #1*
Two engineering students were biking across a university campus when one
said, "Where did you get such a great bike?"
The second engineer replied, "Well, I was walking along yesterday, minding
my own business, when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike, threw it to
took off all her clothes and said, "Take what you want."
The first engineer nodded approvingly and said, "Good choice. The clothes
probably wouldn't have fit you anyway."
*Understanding Engineers #2:*
To the optimist, the glass is half-full.
To the pessimist, the glass is half-empty.
To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.
*Understanding Engineers #3:*
A priest, a doctor, and an engineer were waiting one morning for a
particularly slow group of golfers.
The engineer fumed, "What's with those guys? We must have been waiting for
The doctor chimed in, "I don't know, but I've never seen such inept golf!"
The priest said, "Here comes the greens-keeper. Let's have a word with
him." He said, "Hello George, What's wrong with that group ahead of us?
They're rather slow, aren't they?"
The greens-keeper replied, "Oh, yes. That's a group of blind firemen. They
lost their sight saving our clubhouse from a fire last year, so we always
let them play for free anytime!"
The group fell silent for a moment. The priest said, "That's so sad. I
think I will say a special prayer for them tonight."
The doctor said, "Good idea. I'm going to contact my ophthalmologist
colleague and see if here's anything she can do for them."
The engineer said, "Why can't they play at night?"
*Understanding Engineers #4:*
What is the difference between mechanical engineers and civil engineers?
Mechanical engineers build weapons.
Civil engineers build targets.
*Understanding Engineers #5:*
The graduate with a science degree asks, "Why does it work?"
The graduate with an engineering degree asks, "How does it work?"
The graduate with an accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?"
The graduate with an arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?”
*Understanding Engineers #6:*
Normal people believe that if it ain't broke, don't fix it.
Engineers believe that if it ain't broke, it doesn't have enough features
*Understanding Engineers #7:*
An engineer was crossing a road one day, when a frog called out to him and
said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess."
He bent over, picked up the frog, and put it in his pocket.
The frog spoke up again and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn back into a
beautiful princess and stay with you for one week."
The engineer took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it and returned it
to the pocket.
The frog then cried out, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a princess,
I'll stay with you for one week and do anything you want."
Again, the engineer took the frog out, smiled at it and put it back into
Finally, the frog asked, "What is the matter? I've told you I'm a beautiful
princess and that I'll stay with you for one week and do anything you want.
Why won't you kiss me?"
The engineer said, "Look, I'm an engineer. I don't have time for a
girlfriend, but a talking frog - now that's cool."
*And finally – Understanding Engineers #8:*
Two engineers were standing at the base of a flagpole, looking at its top.
A woman walked by and asked what they were doing.
"We're supposed to find the height of this flagpole," said Sven, "but we
don't have a ladder."
The woman took a wrench from her purse, loosened a couple of bolts, and
laid the pole down on the ground.. Then she took a tape measure from her
took a measurement, announced, "Twenty one feet, six inches," and walked
One engineer shook his head and laughed, "A lot of good that does us. We
ask for the height and she gives us the length!"
Both engineers have since quit their engineering jobs and are currently
serving as elected members of Congress.
November 18, 2015, 8:34 pmKlintock campaign gestapo tactics.
If you think the fascists in charge now are bad get a load of this little intimidation tactic. I am proud of Mr. Masada to tell them to go fuque themselves, hilly the GD criminal can't understand the 1st. Amendment if it kicked in her massive a$$, what a bunch of fascists..........now millions are going to see these comedians speak freely.
FACE OF A FASCIST.
Last Edited: November 18, 2015, 8:35 pm
November 17, 2015, 8:23 amHilly "often confused", writes Humma.
here is the article from Judicial Watch:
Humma Wiener writes that Hilly is often confused and needs help and guidance etc. to keep her on track. I believe that the demoncRAT voters should demand a list of all medications (legal and illegal), alcohol intake, and a complete medical record. They would require this if she went to prison, the voters deserve the truth.
Last Edited: November 17, 2015, 8:28 am
November 15, 2015, 4:36 pmDemocRATic debate last night, what did we learn?
Nothing. They are nothing but poseurs and liars, same as before, un-inspiring, divisive, and BORING.
Hilly and Bernie still making stuff up as they go.
Last Edited: November 15, 2015, 4:37 pm
November 8, 2015, 8:42 pmSNL got some ratings.
November 6, 2015, 10:03 pmCNN & Politico are leftist hacks.
Fuque the sh1tstream media. A scholarship, free education grant, whatever...........Dr. Carson accomplished more than hilly ever will by the time he was in 11th grade.
Last Edited: November 6, 2015, 10:05 pm
November 3, 2015, 7:25 amGuns don't kill people.
Subject: Guns don't kill, people Democrats do.
In 1865 a Democrat shot and killed Abraham Lincoln, President of the United States.
In 1881 a left wing radical Democrat shot James Garfield, President of the United States - who later died from the wound.
In 1963 a radical left wing socialist shot and killed John F. Kennedy, President of the United States .
In 1975 a left wing radical Democrat fired shots at Gerald Ford, President of the United States .
In 1983 a registered Democrat shot and wounded Ronald Reagan, President of the United States .
In 1984 James Hubert, a disgruntled Democrat, shot and killed 22 people in a McDonalds restaurant.
In 1986 Patrick Sherrill, a disgruntled Democrat, shot and killed 15 people in an Oklahoma post office.
In 1990 James Pough, a disgruntled Democrat, shot and killed 10 people at a GMAC office.
In 1991 George Hennard, a disgruntled Democrat, shot and killed 23 people in a Luby's cafeteria in Killeen , TX .
In 1995 James Daniel Simpson, a disgruntled Democrat, shot and killed 5 coworkers in a Texas laboratory.
In 1999 Larry Asbrook, a disgruntled Democrat, shot and killed 8 people at a church service.
In 2001 a left wing radical Democrat fired shots at the White House in a failed attempt to kill George W. Bush, President of the US ...
In 2003 Douglas Williams, a disgruntled Democrat, shot and killed 7 people at a Lockheed Martin plant.
In 2007 a registered Democrat named Seung - Hui Cho, shot and killed 32 people in Virginia Tech.
In 2010 a mentally ill registered Democrat named Jared Lee Loughner, shot Rep. Gabrielle Giffords and killed 6 others.
In 2011 a registered Democrat named James Holmes, went into a movie theater and shot an dkilled 12 people.
In 2012 Andrew Engeldinger, a disgruntled Democrat, shot and killed 7 people in Minneapolis .
In 2013 a registered Democrat named Adam Lanza, shot and killed 26 people in a school in Newtown , CT.
As recently as Sept2013, an angry Democrat shot 12 at a Navy ship yard.
Clearly, there is a problem with Democrats and guns.
Not one NRA member, Tea Party member, or Republican conservative was involved in any of these shootings and murders.
1. Guns don't kill people, Democrats do!
2. We don't need gun control, we need Democrat control.
3. Make it illegal for Democrats to own guns.
4. Reduce the number of Democrats.
October 29, 2015, 8:08 amCruz crushes.
I knew he was very intelligent but I didn't know he has a perfect audio graphic memory he hears something spoken and it is stored in his mind forever for instant retrieval. From the article below: Notice he rattles off four examples of the crap questions they were asking.
“Let me say something at the outset,” said Cruz. “The questions that you have asked so far in this debate illustrate why the American people do not trust the media.
“This is not a cage match,” said Cruz.
“And if you look at the questions: Donald Trump, are you a comic book villain? Ben Carson, can you do math. John Kasich, will you insult two people over here. Jeb Bush, why have your numbers fallen? How about talking about the substantive issues people care about.”
At that point, the audience burst into applause.
“Carl, I am not finished yet,” said Cruz. “The contrast with the Democratic debate, where every fawning question from the media was: Which of you is more handsome and wise?”
Soon after this, pollster Frank Luntz sent out a Tweet: “Ted Cruz's focus group dials hits 98 with his attack on media bias. That's the highest score we've ever measured. EVER.”
He gets another contribution from me. YAY Ted!
Last Edited: October 29, 2015, 8:11 am
October 15, 2015, 9:31 amCNN loves the hilly, bernie not so much.
The socialists get some of the clintock news network's communist tendencies.........awwwwww so sorry.
October 13, 2015, 9:05 amJebby CNN and their dirty tricks.
Shame shame shame...
October 11, 2015, 3:54 pmThose darn demoncRATS just can't help themselves.
Disgusting. Typical demoncRAT.
October 9, 2015, 7:19 pmKing's Meteorologist:
Once upon a time in a land far, far away there was a king who wanted to go fishing.
He called the royal weather forecaster and inquired as to the weather forecast for the next few hours.
The weatherman assured him that there was no chance of rain in the coming days.
So the king went fishing with his wife, the queen. On the way he met a farmer on his donkey. Upon seeing the king the farmer said, "Your Majesty, you should return to the palace at once because in just a short time I expect a huge amount of rain to fall in this area".
The king was polite and considerate, he replied: "I hold the palace meteorologist in high regard. He is an extensively educated and experienced professional. Besides, I pay him very high wages. He gave me a very different forecast. I trust him and I will continue on my way." So he continued on his way.
However, a short time later a torrential rain fell from the sky. The King and Queen were totally soaked and their entourage chuckled upon seeing them in such a shameful condition.
Furious, the king returned to the palace and gave the order to fire the weatherman at once!
Then he summoned the farmer and offered him the prestigious and high paying role of royal forecaster.
The farmer said, "Your Majesty, I do not know anything about forecasting. I obtain my information from my donkey. If I see my donkey's ears drooping, it means with certainty that it will rain."
So the king hired the donkey.
And so began the practice of hiring asses to work in the government and occupy its highest and most influential positions.
October 8, 2015, 8:41 pmStudy government workers make 78% more than private sector.
This is what I have been writing about for years, the study refers to the govt. as some form of industry.................an industry that produces nothing other than crap, regulations, and obstructions for the US citizen to steal cititzen's money and for pay their GD govt. pensions and bennies..................get out the PITCHFORKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Last Edited: October 8, 2015, 8:46 pm
September 13, 2015, 10:16 pmTroll Predictability. Case study 09/13/15.
Case study 09/13/15.
I believe the lil’* (fill in chosen name for e.g. “lil’* sparky”) species troll is the most predictable type of troll since trolls have been on the internet. Unfortunately, this lil’* species troll has chosen LP as its host, and the people of LP are at their wits end as to why this parasitic troll hasn’t been excised from the LP web site.
This particular lil’* troll is most likely an anti-social/Caucasian libtard/frustrated (gender confused) millennial that has created an angry, easily agitated, bigoted online persona that it is beyond repulsive . This lil’* troll has no manners, dialog, honesty, substance, honor , technical ability, or humility for that matter. It is so predictable, hate filled, and angry very clearly proved in comments #’s 1, 4, 6, 8, and 9. It is a fool troll that once again did what I told it to do, like Pavlov’s dog, the Pavlovian troll response. It can’t help itself, it has a defective belief system, it actually believes humans give a sh1t that it gets the last word, it can’t help itself.
It also likes to hammer the keyboard because it thinks somehow it is teaching the human race some kind of lesson…. notice the double post within 4 minutes..Comments #8,9 Impatience….or did it’s momma switch to DSL???
Last Edited: September 13, 2015, 11:28 pm
September 12, 2015, 10:09 pmClean and wiped servers.
Being in IT for so long.........since the days of punch cards........cobal fortran pascal concurrent DOS to today I am still surprised how little people know about the devices that they revolve their lives around every day........hilly's class of users are the most dangerous, lots of money, desire for tech, and no stinking idea how it works so they rely on people that "sound" tech savvy. Burn baby burn.