Original Blog Entry: Ape Removal

ochoop17 — Sat, 27 Sep 2008 12:28:03 GMT

A man wakes up one morning to find a gorilla up in the tree in his front yard. Not knowing quite what to do, he looks in the yellow pages under Gorilla Removal Service and sure enough finds a listing for Harry s Ape Removal.

He calls up Harry and about an hour later Harry shows up with all the tools of his trade, including a pick-up truck, a pair of handcuffs, a ferociously-trained dog and a shotgun.

Harry then proceeds to explain the removal procedure to the man because he will need help:

Now, I m going to climb up in this tree and shake the tree until the gorilla falls out of the tree. The very instant the gorilla hits the ground, this dog is trained to rush up and bite his balls off. This will temporarily immobilize the gorilla allowing you to safely walk up and place the handcuffs on him. I ll then get him into the truck while he s still in a daze.

The man thinks about it for a moment and then asks, Hey, what s the shotgun for?

Oh, right, says Harry, occasionally when I shake the tree, the gorilla shakes back. If I fall, shoot the damn dog!

... [ More ]