Over the past 20 years Mark Gardiner has accumulated pretty much all the paraphernalia one might associate with a lottery winner.
There's the sprawling listed mansion with manicured grounds and kidney-shaped swimming pool, the gleaming Aston Martin in the garage, and the exotic holidays when he fancies them.
As he puts it: "People write a list of what they'd do when they win the lottery, don't they? New house, flash car, lovely holidays, private jets. Well, I've ticked them all off."
But his riches have brought with them a deal of trouble, too: bitter ex-wives, estranged daughters and a slew of court cases launched by friends and acquaintances anxious to avail themselves of the Gardiner good fortune.
Such is the toxic legacy of his windfall that, today, 51-year-old Mark can count on one hand the number of people he remains in touch with from his pre-lottery days — and that includes his family.
"Everyone who plays the lottery has their lists and plans. But the reality is you actually have no idea how you are going to feel about the money until you actually win — and what you don't know is how it is going to make everyone feel about you.
"It brings out a lot of jealousy and resentment. It can end some of your problems but start a whole lot of new ones."
Sobering words at a time when we are increasingly obsessed with the pursuit of easy wealth, yet simultaneously reminded of its mixed blessings.
Recently, it seems barely a day has passed without the story of a lottery winner who has suffered huge emotional misfortune after accumulating enormous wealth.
Last month, EuroMillions winners Adrian and Gillian Bayford, of Haverhill, Suffolk, who scooped £148 million in August 2012, announced they were divorcing after nine years of marriage, blaming the "stress" of becoming overnight multi-millionaires.
Then, last weekend, Graham and Amanda Nield from Yorkshire, who pocketed £6 million in August, declared that being rich was a "headache" and spoke of their struggle to shake off their thrifty ways.
They said they intended to stick to a £50 limit for Christmas gifts and were clearly uncomfortable with their newfound fortune.
Mrs Nield, 48, said: "My friend took me to Harvey Nichols in Leeds and I nearly passed out at the prices."
These stories and others like them present no surprises to Mark, a cheerful figure who has had plenty of time to reflect on the vicissitudes of sudden fortune after pocketing £11 million nearly 20 years ago.
Speaking from the comfort of his £2 million manor house in Hastings, Mark speaks candidly to me — over a round of sausage sandwiches.
"People think it's all champagne and caviar, but I bet even the Queen likes a sandwich for her tea from time to time," he says defensively.
He tells me that such were his experiences, that Camelot — the UK National Lottery operator — now asks him to advise winners on the good and bad which lays ahead of them.
"I'm like the Lottery Godfather," he chuckles. "Although they don't always like me telling the truth, but it needs to be said. One woman asked me recently whether she would fall out with friends and family. I said: 'Do you want me to lie or do you want me to tell you the truth?'"
Mark was 32 when he and Paul Maddison, his business partner in a struggling double glazing firm, became the sole winners of a £22.6 million jackpot in June 1995.
"Like everyone, we'd drawn up a list of what we'd need when we decided to play the lottery. It was a house each, clear off the overdraft from the business, get a new van. I think we got to about £500,000. We would have been very happy with that," he recalls.
"Then the Camelot guy took out his laptop and said 'you've won £22.59 million'.
"We were speechless. I remember we walked to the bar and ordered two large brandies, which we had to get Paul's wife to pay for as we didn't have any cash."
At the time, the National Lottery was in its infancy, meaning winners were big news.
Despite his relative youth, Mark had two ex-wives, was divorcing his third, and about to marry his fourth. He is the first to admit that his romantic life was chaotic to say the least. "I was a bit of a troubled young man," he says.
While Paul quietly set his affairs in order and retired to Scotland, Mark's colorful romantic CV led to a flurry of headlines as old flames scurried from the woodwork.
Some claimed to have borne Gardiner's lovechildren, while others said they had been cheated on. Even his adoptive mother Irene — with whom Mark had fallen out just weeks before his lottery win when he told her he was getting divorced again — weighed in, dubbing him "Nasty Mark".
Those first few days would only set the tone for what followed.
"It felt like every letter I received had the opening sentence: 'we act on behalf of'. There were letters from everyone, from ex-wives to guys who I went to school with.
"It was ludicrous. I got six numbers in the right order and all of a sudden I'm worth something. I would have had some respect for them if their grievance had come up before — if there's a principle, there's a principle.
"Then there were the people who hung around sucking up until they got what they wanted — money for this, money for that. I even had people saying: 'Buy me a house'.
The thing is, he did: in the first year after his win, Mark bought four of his friends neighboring houses in a cul-de-sac nearby, costing half a million each. Yet his altruism backfired catastrophically.
Within five years he was no longer on speaking terms with any of them. Mark jokes that relating what happened in each case would take hours, but can best summarize it thus: "I thought I was doing a nice thing, but that's not how it was seen.
"I suppose they thought I was flashing my money around, although they were happy enough to take it. Everyone had their own issues, although a lot of them weren't to do with them, but the people they were surrounded with who had problems with them being bankrolled by me.
"Put it down to greed, jealousy ... all those nasty words, but they went through all that. And I think they felt that by cutting themselves off from me, it would save them further grief."
What Mark found, he says, is that while he hadn't changed, people's perceptions of him had.
"You can't win — if you buy a round for everyone in the bar you're a Flash Harry, and if you don't you're tight. It's the same with the bigger stuff — if you get the nice car you're splashing your money around. If you don't, people resent you for holding onto it.
"I've had people come up to me accusingly saying: 'it's a miracle you've got any money left with what you've bought.' And I say to them: 'yeah, I've done this terrible thing, I've spent some of it'. Not that it's any of their business."
And spend he did — not that he regrets it.
"I bought a house and a couple of cars — a Ford Escort and a Ford Maverick, so hardly flash. But I also made the decision pretty quickly that I wasn't going to retire, and I put £2 million straight into the business."
His business partner, meanwhile, sold up, leaving Mark in sole charge. He remains proud of the double-glazing company to this day.
"It's a good business and it does well. Ideally I'd like to sell it to someone, not because I need the money but to show I did something for myself."
In time there would be more spending — a £500,000 holiday home in Barbados, later sold as part of a divorce settlement, a string of Aston Martins and a £750,000 motorboat which he moored in Eastbourne.
Then there was an ill-fated £250,000 investment in Hastings football club, which left him with little to show for it. "Bad idea" he says now with a grin.
Then there were the wives. Mark was one week away from signing the decree absolute with wife number three, Kim Cresswell — now 49, mother of his now 21-year-old daughter Jessica — when he won the lottery.
Mark's second marriage had ended just three years earlier: "Sue, my second wife, wanted me in the pipe and slippers. It wasn't me.
"Finally the penny dropped that I wasn't that kind of guy and she left. With Kim it was different — we fought like cat and dog and I felt life was too short. At least Sue didn't come after the money."
Under the terms of the settlement to Kim, however, he is unable to say what he paid, although he concedes that he begrudges it. "I was always going to put together a trust fund for Jessica. But Kim? I regret every penny."
Then came Brenda, the woman he married four months after the lottery win, and mother to his other daughter Katie, now 18. They met when he heckled her at a karaoke club and were happy enough at first he says, but then the money came between them, too.
"She was a council estate girl, a woman of simple tastes, and that's why I liked her. When I won the money she was a fish out of water.
"I bought her an Aston Martin and had to swap it for a Ford Escort because she didn't feel comfortable driving it. She still shopped at Poundland. In the end she just couldn't cope. I remember we went to Barbados and she was shouting and screaming about wanting to go home."
When they finally split in 2004, after ten years of marriage, it was to prove another expensive divorce, the details of which he again can't reveal.
"What I can say is that she wasn't a big spender until we got divorced."
Unhappily, he is estranged from both his daughters, a situation his money can do little to improve. In both cases, he believes, their mothers have turned them against him. "I spent thousands on solicitors and barristers trying to get contact with both girls, but it got to the point where it felt like every time we broke a wall down there would be another one behind it.
"I just made a decision to stop fighting my ex-wives. It was tearing me apart.
"All I can say is that I have a room with legal files, one marked Jessica and one marked Katie, and one day I hope they will look through them and make up their own minds."
At one point, he admits, he was so overwrought that he sought treatment for depression and consulted a psychotherapist.
"There are only so many legal letters you can open without it getting to you. I was in court so many times I used to joke that I should have my own suite. It all got on top of me. I wasn't going nuts, but it was tough."
He's since got over it, but some soured relationships will never be saved: Irene, the mother who adopted him when he was a baby, died seven years ago without them ever reconciling.
Of his immediate family, he is only in touch with one cousin and a de facto uncle, Uncle Jim, a close friend of his mother's. "It's just the way it is," he shrugs. "At the end of the day I tried my best." There have, at least, been better times of late: in 2004, Mark reconciled with Bridget Baker, 49, his first wife (they were married for a year at the tender ages of, respectively, 23 and 21).
Their reunion accelerated the decline of his marriage to Brenda, but he says he has no regrets. They have been together ever since, remarried in 2009 and have an eight-year-old son James.
"Bridget finally made me feel contented, settled. In some ways I spent 21 years making my way back to her," he says.
It is hard to argue: a calm presence, Bridget, a former travel agent, has her own take on proceedings. "Whatever is going on in your life when you win, it will magnify by ten times," she says.
Little wonder Camelot now like Mark to dispense his wisdom. "They nearly all say they're going to jack in work. And two years later they're working again. Why? Because they're bored," he says.
"I say to all of them: 'It's all very well talking about going fishing all the time. But if you're not careful, the thing you love becomes the thing you hate.' For me working has been my secret formula for keeping sane."
He still goes into his company, Croft Glass, seven days a week, tootling round Hastings in the company van. "I enjoy it," he says.
"Although what the money does is allow me, on a sunny day, to say 'I'm off to play golf' and I like that too.
"I am pleased to say I will be okay until my death and so will my son unless he's an idiot. And that is a very nice position to be in."
But as Mark can testify, the money can put you in other, less enviable positions, too. Something it is wise for us all to be reminded of the next time we buy that lottery ticket.
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Thanks to truesee for the tip.
Not a problem for me. I have no ex-wives, estrange children that I know of, and I don't keep many friends.
There are two other big winners in UK that divorced recently. I hope if I win the Euro- millions tonight it doesn't bring trouble to me .........Jackpot is at $116m Tax free
When I win, I'm sure I'll face my share of problems, some already foreseen, others not so much. Life has its surprises for us all. But i guarantee it wont be these problems. No sir...
Interesting read.
Hopefully he will be able to have a relationship with his daughters.
Wow! What a story. Like Biggie said, "Mo' money, Mo' problems." It doesn't say how much he has left though. It seems like he shelled out a lot in the 20 years since he won it, he can't have that much left. <snip> shame about the kids though, hope they reconcile.
Seems to me this guy had family and relationship problems long before the lottery win. It was not the money that ruined those relationships. He blames the lottery win, but he does not sound like a nice person. Maybe he has changed since his lottery win, matured some, but when he won he made his problems into even bigger problems.
I'm not saying the money won't cause problems with friends and family, though. There's always going to be someone related or connected to a lottery winner who becomes disgruntled out of jealousy. Like many have said before, a winner has to learn to say NO before anything else.
With good financial planning and good communication with a close knit family, it does not have to be this way.
With 4 wives, I'm not really sure any other winner will experience to level of litigation this guy has, but I do find it telling that a lot of what he says is exactly what others, even the ones who don't lose their money have said. The loss of friendship from people you thought you knew well. People who expect you to do for them but are never happy, no matter how much you give them. And the constant judgement so you can never do anything right. You either spend too much or not enough. Even worse is the estrangement from family members, though he didn't sound like he was that close to his, so maybe no big loss there.
All things being equal though, I think I might prefer to hear from his business partner. A person with tumultuous relationships to start with might not be the best individual to express how the lottery affects relationships. Let's hear from the people who started off with normalcy.
I believe this man may be insane if he's actually getting married again. As for losing friends and family yeah that's naturally going to happen, personally losing "family" would be no big loss since I can already do without them and outside my mother wouldn't miss any of them in the slightest.
People you know can change just as much if not more than yourself.
yeah no mater how much you give people they will become resentful and jealous. so i say give em nothing and skip right to the resentful and jealous part without wasting any of your cash.
Agreed shows no matter what you do for some it would never be enough. That's why I agree with states that let you not go public. But some people don't get it go running around telling EVERYONE. Beyond stupid, and that is only asking for trouble.
Glad things are better for this guy now. Hope he keeps having a great life. And I hope his daughters will get to know there dad for the right reasons before it's to late. They would regret not getting to know him down the road.
He re-married his first wife in 2009 and they are currently married with an 8 year old son.
I agree. Do not buy homes for your friends. They will want more and you will ruin a friendship. Money changes personal dynamics. I saw some show (not lottery related I think but an Oprah "where are they now" show) and this woman was always footing the bill for lunches with her friends, etc. The first time she stopped it, virtually all her "friends" left. So they were never her friends. She learned self esteem, lost a bunch of weight, and was much happier. If a good friend of mine won a JP, I would not want or expect a dime. Now if they volunteered to make a donation to my favorite charity, I would allow that of course.
When I win no one will know, I live in a state that allows me to be annoymous so that's 3/4 of the battle there. And as for my family and friends it's my money I'll do what I please. If anyone gets their nose out of joint they can sulk or throw a fit but I also won't speak to them anymore. I have nothing in writing with any of them and my family is not close to start with. So someone from another branch coming with a sob story or demanding money will get hung up on or a door in the face. I have zero tolerance for them. The odds of them finding out are low as well. They don't call now why would they suddenly start?
I'd take care of my parents and sister beyond that friends and other family and all are on their own. Of course I don't have 4 ex husbands and no kids so that also takes complications out of it as well. When my life took a turn and I was divorcing my husband a few years ago no one helped me, I did it myself. And today I am fine.
Like I said parents and sister will be cared for everyone else the lake is that way, commence leaping --->
It's hard to say without actually winning, but I plan to be generous, however, if you ask me, my answer will be no. My gifts will be entirely of my choosing, and I don't want to set a dangerous precedent that not so close friends and strangers can expect money from me like that poor fellow Shakespeare. If they are not happy with my gift, so be it. I'll have no regrets and will move on.
I think if you can claim anonymously, it takes half the aggravation out of the picture. There won't be any long lost friends tracking you down, or family members trying to sue you claiming some made-up lie about you promising them a share...or worse, hire a hitman like Mr Post's brother.
They really need to stop the nonsense and make anonymity an option. If you want to tell the world, so be it. If you don't, that option should be there for you.
The old saying goes misery loves company. When people see you doing good, they somehow blame you for their resentment. If I ever hit for several million, I will not tell my family that I hit for that much, just that I hit for a nice sum. Jackpot money is definitely the tester to how strong your freindship, spouse and families ties truly are.
Yeah, I agree. I found out (thanks to Jon D) that California now requires a "natural person" to claim prizes. We still have the option to decline press conferences, etc., but we can't claim via a trust anymore, effective earlier this year. Sad, when you consider some states are trying to move in the other direction towards anonymity.
"You can't win — if you buy a round for everyone in the bar you're a Flash Harry, and if you don't you're tight. It's the same with the bigger stuff — if you get the nice car you're splashing your money around. If you don't, people resent you for holding onto it."
This is exactly why I would want to remain anonymous. When you're poor, you can't please everybody. When you're suddenly rich, you can't please nobody.
You don't have to be anonymous to refuse to discuss your personal business with anyone, even if they are your relatives or call themselves your friends.
I'm not rich now and if I ever won a lottery jackpot I can't think of any reason to start treating my relatives and friends any different even if they suspected I had come into some extra money.
Yeah you can refuse to discuss it when you're poor and they just feel sorry for you. When they know you've won millions of dollars, all the sudden you become a rich snob who acts like you're too good to talk to them. Like the guy in the article said, you're <snip>ed if you do and <snip>ed if you don't.
(They) will always have an opinion about you but (they) aren't usually your friends anyway so who cares what (they) think? If you think you have to please people you don't even know then you have a problem.
"...I plan to be generous, however, if you ask me, my answer will be no."
OK, I promise not to ask but just remember if you win I want some, ok?
this duscussion reminds me of the guy i know, who alwas bangs on about how much they plan to share winning lotto , when i know he nevers buys a ticket.
There are so many stories regarding this. I guess the only solution as I've always said is "stand your ground". If you never called or came to see me before I won, then why are you here now?
I've known wealthy people, poor people, everybody in between. My conclusion: People are generally predictable. The people who will look for a handout or maybe outright ask you for a large percentage of your winnings just because, already do similar things at a smaller scale. Most people, at least if they aren't already suffering financially, will take pride in what they have and maybe be a bit jealous, but not so much. The issue with lottery money is that because you didn't earn it, people who knew you before the win don't really see it as *your* money, just money you were put in control of. Therefore, you parting with it isn't a big deal because you didn't have it to begin with. Then, conversely, it becomes a weird game of, knowing PRECISELY how much money a person has, everybody is paying close attention to your real assets: house, car(s), other items, etc. doing the math, figuring out what's left and so then if you give them too much, you're either a sap or insulting their ability to get by on their own and if you don't, well, like he said, you're stingy for such a rich guy. Then, if you spend any of the money on nice stuff, a lot of people will assume you're being purely careless with your money and if you don't spend it on nice stuff, a lot of people will think "Why did they play if they weren't going to use the money? I know how to use money. I should have that kind of money."
It's a no win situation. If I win, I'll win in California, most likely, meaning my identity will be revealed. I already know the people who will hit me up for MILLIONS just because they feel like it. Those are people whose friendships I could already do without, so losing contact won't be guilt-inducing or complicated. As for family- my folks are retirement age and like to tell me they're pretty close to financially set so that if they wanted they could get a vacation property, pay off the house, etc. using their investments and so on, so giving them an extra couple million would probably make the difference. Though I could be wrong.
Other family are pretty humble people who either just won't ask, or might even refuse to take it. And as much as I love them at a basic level, if we lost contact, it wouldn't affect anybody's lives.
The people I worry about are exes- both of the girlfriend and hook up varieties. I know for certain nobody can prove I sired a kid and I'm pretty sure nobody could try to sue me for giving them any STI's/STD's. The only other thing I can think of is the nebulous realm of rape, which has a six year statute of limitations. Meaning any girl I've hooked up with after drinking alcohol, or any girl I had relations with during an ugly bout in the relationship could possibly accuse me of rape...that's kind of scary. But, I figure if they wait a really long time to do it and only bother once I've won the lottery, most court systems would see right through that, right?
Otherwise anybody suing or looking for a handout is gonna be a random stranger or nebulously connected acquaintance nobody has any way of accounting for.
Of course I could be wrong about all of this- I'm known to be a somewhat paranoid guy to begin with.
Well, I have to admit I've never thought about the rape angle, I guess simply because I've never once heard it mentioned by any previous winner, even the ones with the sketchy pasts. But anyone who waits until after a person wins the lottery to cry rape will have a severely uphill battle. Especially if no report had ever been filed. and it's very risky because it's a serious charge to make and it could backfire and have them be charged instead. So I doubt that should be a serious consideration and while I don't consider myself paranoid I do like to plan for every contingency.
Worry more about ex-'friends' either making up stories to sell to the tabloids or trying to claim you had some agreement that you'd split any win. That seems to happen a lot to winners and thn they have to spend money and time trying to prove that no such agreement was ever made. I mean, just look at what that sister did to that winner in Canada. He spent...what? 3 years in court before her case was finally dismissed. That was very troubling to me.
Then there are the people who go onto any business or residential property you own, have a convenient 'accident' and sue for pain, sufferng and whatever other damages they can. Again, they may not win their case, but you're shelling out tens of thousands to lawyers to have it dealt with not to mention just the hassle of being sued.
Yet another reason I wish JP wins were voluntarily anonymous. As I said before, I believe people would enjoy their winnings a lot more if they were allowed anonymity. Half the headaches come simply from getting their names and wealth being publicized. There will still be idiots like The King of Chavs or Leroy Fick or the dear Cynthia Stafford who will do their utmost to show off their 'wealth' as much as they can so the lottery will never need to worry about not being able to milk the free publicity. But for people who want the joy of the wealth, minus a lot of the headaches, it should be a consideration. You shouldn't have to go into hiding because you've been given good fortune. It's ridiculous.
Too funny. ROFLMAO
The problem with that is that you don't have to discuss it with anyone and it's still in everyone's face. You don't have to discuss what you're going to do with the with the money with anyone but they'll still know how much you have, it'll still be a topic of discussion for them. It's one thing for friends and family members to assume you're doing financially well (say from a very good job or good investments) and another entirely for them to know you're filthy rich and how much you're worth down to the penny.
And you don't have to treat them any differently, they'll take care of that for you.
I refuse to believe that every single lottery winner was surrounded by all shallow friends and family members. And yet, they all say the same thing: people they thought they knew started treating them differently. Friendships changed. Relationships ended.
We all hear these stories and glibly say that these people were never really their friends so they were better off. But does that change the fact that they lost the friendship of someone they were close with? Someone they cared about deeply?
I've had friends I've lost who I can honestly say, thank goodness because I never knew what they were really like untl XYZ happened. And yet, it didn't change the fact that the situation caused me a great deal of pain to find that out. Imagine finding that out about a bunch of people you deemed your friends all because you came into some money.
The end result doesn't make going through it any less painful or stressful and/or sad. I think one person here and there over years wouldn't bother most people that much, it comes with being an adult; but for lottery winners, it seems to all happen in a short period of time. And that bothers a great deal of them. As I imagine it would bother most of us too.
Can I tell you a little secret? come close....closer...closer stillll. YOU ARE NEVER GOING TO HAVE A PROBLEM FREE LIFE!!! It does not exist. You will always trade one set of problems for another, especially when you make a quantum leap such as this. At this present moment I am struggling to put food on the table. The market changed in my work situation and my pay has plummetted. Thinking about how to pay for my children's college is no longer an option, it just makes me a million times more depressed. I know if I won some money people would treat me differently and yes I may lose friends but you know what? I will take that any day over this constant struggle and heartache. The people that DO matter will always be there. Money is an excellent filter. If I won millions of dollars I would move anyway and definitely not buy people houses. i don't want to pay the taxes on that. Jesus christ people are really stupid. I'm sorry but they really can be. It really irritates the living horse poo out of me when i hear these whiney winners.
A downside would be a flat tire or a rainy day. Not sure what kind of Tool this guy is, but only a screwdriver, hammer, or pliers would have a downside after winning a jackpot.
BRAVO!!!!!!! Well said my friend. You and I are in the same boat with this one. I just dont get it either. You know what you're talking about Lucky!!!
Recon MegaSuperPower some would be targeting you to have consensual sex and then cry rape with the dna evidence intact? After your arrest, their lawyer would contact you and agree not to press charges for a million!
What choices will you have SuperMan? Take alot of trips by yourself way out of state or country and introduce yourself as John Smith! Otherwise date rich gals exclusively at that point!
Cheers!
The mistake they made was going public, the UK lottery allows winners to remain anonymous. When you win a large sum it must be hard not to share the good news with everyone, but many who do later regret it. It may start innocently, with people asking to "borrow" 100 dollars for this and that, it not seem much and people feel mean if they do not give the money. But over time people ask larger amounts and arguments begin.
Condoms. Screen shots of pertinent texts. Maybe even a consent form. Like I said, I'm just being paranoid because reading up on lottery winners I can't help but assume the worst from some people.
But, like others said, if they're only threatening to press charges ATFER you've won the lottery, it's about being paid off, not necessarily seeing you go to jail. BTW I'm NOT trying to imply I think I did something wrong at some point or even know I did and worry it could come back to haunt me. I just know that once one person wins the lottery, suddenly the nature of relationships change, even if relationships were severed long before the win.
Like, what's to stop an ex from saying "one night (less than six years ago) so-and-so (lottery winner) was sexually aggressive in a way I wasn't comfortable with, therefore I feel it was some kind of sexual assault."
The big question for the courts would be- why wait until AFTER this person won millions to come forward, right?
You can expand this to business stuff, too. You make preliminary arrangements or off-handed agreements with someone years in the past related to "if i win the lottery, because you're my (current, at the time) best friend/romantic partner, etc. I would totally give you a share of the winnings." and then you ACTUALLY WIN, but years after the fact, when circumstances have changed for one reason or another. Do you think someone would still have ANY grounds to come collecting?
It's just amazing to me how civil litigation works sometimes. To the supposed victim goes the spoils. Like, when you hear of Hollywood types paying off former sexual partners or supposed business partners in an undisclosed settlement, I highly doubt it's because all the famous people are unscrupulous penny pinchers, but that it's easier to give someone some money to go away than to deal with the public awkwardness and prolonged sham legal battle by contesting their allegations.
I think you're missing th point or you didn't undrstand what I was trying to say. Because only a complete and total moron would ever think that life, no matter the circumstances would ever be problem free. I didn't think I needed to waste the time to add that caveat, since no one lives in candyland and this is the REAL world, but perhaps I was wrong.
The winners who cry and say they wish they had never won are the idiots who always get themselves in bad situations and then blame the lottery for all their grief.
The winners who are thoughtful, caring, sweet and conscienscious, who try to advise others that it's not all champagne and caviar, reagrdless of their best intntions,I get what they are saying. And I'm not going to belittle their pain simply because they are now loaded. It's like people feel that just because they won the lottery they don't have the right to feel pain or anger at anything any more. They were put in positions, through no fault of their own, that hurt them. Should compassion disappear because they came into money? A perfect example of how they are treated differently even if they stay the same.
Take the JP out of the equation and you'd feel sorry for anyone getting sued by a greedy family member. Or anyone whose brother hires a hitman. Or anyone whose spouse trades them in for someone younger and more attractive. Make it a lottery winner and empathy becomes non-existent.
Now, I would gladly part ways with some family and 'friends' in exchange for being set for life. I'd definitely get over it. But I'm not going to pretend that the process wouldn't probably be painful for me or that they don't have the right to be upset simply because they are better off financially than I am.
"or you didn't undrstand what I was trying to say."
My post was directed in no one particular...all I did was read the main article and reply. I honestly don't even know what you posted, but I will go back and read it
"...any girl I had relations with..."
That reminded me of something that still makes me LMAO all these years later.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iB25eDhWImc
Haha. Thanks to you I just spent 10 minutes watching Nutty Professor YouTube clips!
Well it goes without saying that when you win the lottery your life will change even if you don't want it too. Winning can be both a blessing and a curse.
I sitll hope to win one day though!!! LOL
I've never understood this thing of people coming out of the woodwork wanting your money. I am related to several millionaires. They don't give me any of their money, nor do I expect them to. I'd have no trouble dumping ANY friend or relative who felt entitled to my winnings.
The truth is, if you have enough money to play the lottery, you've already hit Life's Lottery. You've got a roof over your head, heating and a/c, a refrigerator with food in it, hot and cold running water. That's more than 90% of all the people on the planet have. My lottery winnings would go to help save animals, to make life easier for the Wounded Warriors, to give a leg up to several hard working people I know of who show up with a smile on their faces every day and give it the best they've got. It would NOT go to making my very comfortable friends and relatives rich.
Nor would it go to buying outrageously expenive toys or further decorating my house or my body. At some point, I'd hope that people realize that lottery winnings are a golden opportunity to make thier lives mean something more than a closet full of expensive rags.
Well Said thegrrrr8est Well Said
I have knew a few as friends
One I used to run into quite often at a country store , a millionaire many times
We would sit and talk now and then
He had a pretty stressful life , people always after him legal and otherwise ( always trying to set him up ) , and he was always running around trying to take care of what he had and owned
His name was Lewis
We were talking one afternoon , and he looked at me real serious and said " You know Gary , a man would be better off if he didnt have nothing "
I smiled at him and said " Your gettin ' kinda smart in your old age , arent you Lewis "
He is gone on now............I miss our talks we used to have
I never seen any U-haul 's following his hearse