Let's Blame The Victim Again

Published:

Updated:

I'm angry at this moment.  A few days ago I first heard the story about a 20 year old female marine that was missing.  She had been missing for weeks and nobody took that seriously, even though she was about to testify at a trial. She was also 8 months pregnant with a baby boy.  Last year she accused a superior of raping her and has been harassed ever since.  Well into her pregnancy she was attacked from behind and then punched in the face but was unable to identify her assailant. More recently, her car was "keyed" by someone on the base.

During the past week, I've heard reporters quote her mother (turns out she is not her birth parent) calling her a "clingy child" who called several times a week. She also said she "didn't always tell the whole truth" and she was borderline "bi-polar." I will bet real money this describes a lot of people on Lottery Post too.

My question is, what does this have to do with the fact that a 20 year old pregnant woman disappeared from the face of the Earth?  Let's imagine that 22 year old John Smith is found murdered in his home. Would they say "He was clingy and called home every day" or "He was a wonderful son. He called home everyday to talk to his Mom & Dad." 

Whether a person is beautiful, plain, thin or fat, White or Black, young or old, male or female, when that person is a victim of rape or assault, he/she has been violated.  Yet when a woman is raped, beaten or stalked, in many instances her character is torn apart.  Her reputation is challenged.  A car theft is treated with more compassion.

Now that so much time has been wasted on deciding whether or not she "ran away" her charred remains have been found in a grave in the backyard of the accused.  Both she and the 8 month old fetus were brutalized and burned.

She asked for protection and she didn't get it.  A brave woman who stood up to the military and said, "I need to be heard" was silenced.  She and her son will never get their justice. So I guess she wasn't lying after all.   

Rest in Peace, Maria & Baby Boy 

Entry #111

Comments

Avatar justxploring -
#1
Just an added thought: Whoever is convicted of this violent crime will not be charged for harming the baby. North Carolina law does not recognize an 8 month old fetus as a person.

Avatar Tenaj -
#2
Justx, he will get what's coming to him.
Avatar pacattack05 -
#3
It's unfortunate that the very few women that yell rape just as a weapon used to get back for whatever reason, can taint the majority of women who really are asking for help, not just once, but like you said, in her case, many times.

I heard of that story too on the news , but what you wrote is now news to me, because I hadn't kept up, and was shocked to read what you wrote. I remember the family members saying that they were sure the police would find her safe, and that's the part that I remember, seeing that photo of her in the uniform, while they were saying that, and to find this out must be awful on the family.

Avatar justxploring -
#4
Tenaj, I am usually a strong critic of Nancy Grace, but last night someone suggested that the suspect's wife might have committed the crime, since there was blood spatter thoughout the home and she also had a note of some kind saying the victim committed suicide (not sure) I am so glad she cut him off and said it was too ridiculous to even discuss. Actually, now that I think about it, one of the women who comment on her show said maybe it was the wife acting as "a woman scorned."

I didn't want to make my blog entry too long, but maybe another day I'll talk about a personal experience where I was a victim of assault and the police used the word "relationship." When someone is shot or his house is burglarized, do they say there might be a relationship between the criminal and the victim? Makes me want to puke. I don't know this particular situation, but there was never a relationship established between this married man and his accuser. Sure, it's a stretch for someone to say that maybe she seduced him, got pregnant, lied about the rape, took vengeance and threatened him, but until anything like that is proven, it shouldn't be brought up since we can take any act of violence and try to connect the victim in some way. If a man followed me home from 7-11 and someone saw me talking to him, it doesn't mean I know him. Even when I was nice to a neighbor who needed someone to talk to, people around here thought we were "involved" and he was the last man on the planet (seriously) I would even kiss. I don't know his last name & never gave him my phone number or cell # no matter how many times he asked. I can't imagine finding him the least bit interesting or attractive, and he makes the characters on Hee-Haw look sophisticated, but people like to gossip and if he attacked or killed me, I'll bet something like "She knew him. They spent a lot of time together" would be on the news.
Avatar spy153 -
#5
The whole thing is just ugly. Unfortunately, too, happens a lot on military bases. I'm surprised to be hearing about it publicly. They usually cover it up better. In this case, it doesn't seem like they tried to cover it up any at all. They wanted the world to know. I'm angry at what happened to the girl and baby, but I'm wondering what the real news story is here.

I think it should be a law that recruiters tell young females joining the military (males too, these days) that there is the distinct possibility that you may get raped. Odds are higher in a co-ed situation.    And in permanent party you are just 'fresh meat'.   For me, basic training was all females, except our male drill seargents. AIT (the next phase) was co-ed. Permanent Party was where my danger lurked for rape scenarios. The chances are astronamical there, if you drink and party. And even if you don't, you're likely to be jumped by a gang of men while making your way across base. I saw many girls get pregnant by superiors during our training phases, but as far as I knew it was consentual sex. The "superiors" in every case I witnessed did NOT take responsibility for getting the girl pregnant. And they were ALL married. Some were getting "kicked out" because the superior that got them pregnant wanted rid of them. It's a dangerous thing to be a female in the military. Don't let anyone tell you any different. I have two daughters. One of them has been the target for the military recruiters here for some time now. She "aced" the ASVAB (a military test pre-requisite). Made the highest score in our region. She has her pick in military occupations, should she choose to accept. But I have warned her of their lies, and the danders. And now, this should be the icing on the cake for her to know it is not a good place for young women.


Post a Comment

Please Log In

To use this feature you must be logged into your Lottery Post account.

Not a member yet?

If you don't yet have a Lottery Post account, it's simple and free to create one! Just tap the Register button and after a quick process you'll be part of our lottery community.

Register