Some of the myths about marriage...
  Husband and wife are getting all snugly in bed. Their passion is
  heating up. Then the wife stops and says: "I don't feel like it, I
  just want you to hold me." The husband says: "WHAT??" The wife
  explains that he must not be in tune
  with her emotional needs as a Woman. The husband realizes that nothing
  is going to happen and he might as well deal with it.
  So the next day the husband takes her shopping at a big dept store. He
  walks around and has her try on three very expensive outfits. She
  can't decide. He tells his wife to take all three of them. Then they
  go over and get matching shoes worth $200 each. And then they go to
  the Jewelry Dept. where she gets a set of diamond ear rings. His wife
  is so excited. She thinks her husband has flipped out but she does not
  care. She goes for the tennis bracelet. The husband says: "But you
  don't even play tennis, but OK if you like it then let's get it." The
  wife is jumping up and
  down so excited she cannot even believe what is going on. She says: "I
  am ready to go, lets go to the cash register."
  The husband says: "No - no - no, honey we're not going to buy all this
  stuff." The wife's face goes blank. "No honey. I just want you to HOLD
  this stuff for a while." Her face gets really mad and she is about to
  explode and the Husband says: "You must not be in tune with my
  financial needs as a Man!!!"