Dispatcher: 9-1-1- What's the nature of your emergency?

Caller: My wife is pregnant and her contractions are coming two minutes apart.

Dispatcher: Is this her first child?

Caller: No, you idiot! This is her husband!

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And the winner is.....

 

Dispatcher: Yeah, I'm having trouble breathing. I'm all out of breath.

Darn... I think I'm going to pass out.

Dispatcher: Sir, where are you calling from?

Caller: I'm at a pay phone. North and Foster.

Dispatcher: ! Sir, an ambulance is on the way. Are you an asthmatic?

Caller: No

Dispatcher: What were you doing before you started having trouble breathing?

Caller: Running from the Police.