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December 18, 2013, 11:50 amChuckles...
ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?
WITNESS: No, I just lie there.
ATTORNEY: What is your date of birth?
WITNESS: July 18th.
ATTORNEY: What year?
WITNESS: Every year.
ATTORNEY: How old is your son, the one living with you?
WITNESS: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which.
ATTORNEY: How long has he lived with you?
WITNESS: Forty-five years.
ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
WITNESS: I forget..
ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?
ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?
ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the 20-year-old, how old is he?
WITNESS: He's 20, much like your IQ.
ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken?
WITNESS: Are you <snip>ting me?
ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time?
WITNESS: Getting laid
ATTORNEY: She had three children , right?
ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?
WITNESS: Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney?
ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?
WITNESS: By death..
ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?
WITNESS: Take a guess.
ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?
WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard
ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?
WITNESS: Unless the Circus was in town I'm going with male.
ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.
ATTORNEY: Doctor , how many of these autopsies have you performed on the deceased?
WITNESS: All of them. The live ones put up too much of a fight.
ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 PM
ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
WITNESS: If not, he was by the time I finished.
ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
WITNESS: Are you qualified to ask that question?
ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?
ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?
ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.
December 17, 2013, 6:00 pmDaddy , how was I born?
Daddy , how was I born?
A little boy goes to his father and asks 'Daddy, how was I born?'
The father answers, 'Well, son, I guess one day you will need to find out anyway! Your Mom and I first got together in a chat room on Yahoo. Then I set up a date via e-mail with your Mom and we met at a cyber-cafe. We sneaked into a secluded room, and googled each other. There your mother agreed to a download from my hard drive. As soon as I was ready to upload, we discovered that neither one of us had used a firewall, and since it was too late to hit the delete button, nine months later a little Pop-Up appeared that said:
Scroll down...You'll love this ....
'You got Male!
December 14, 2013, 9:43 pmMiss Kitty's prs. wk 12-15
02 05 07
14 15 17
33 37 39
45 47 48
57 58 59
December 7, 2013, 9:25 pmMiss Kitty's prs. wk. 12-8
14 16 17 18 19
Last Edited: December 7, 2013, 9:25 pm
December 7, 2013, 7:52 pmPoll on ACA..
Poll: Do you have a more favorable view of the Affordable Care Act now that the website is working?
Saturday, December 7, 2013 2:51:04 PM � by South40 � 60 replies
San Diego Union-Tribune ^ | 12/7/2013
Do you have a more favorable view of the Affordable Care Act now that the website is working? 28% saying YES 71% saying NO Poll Here
December 4, 2013, 2:34 pmNewsweek and Obama..
Finally, Matt Patterson and Newsweek speak out about Obama. This is timely and tough. As many of you know, Newsweek has a reputation for being extremely liberal. The fact that their editor saw fit to print the following article about Obama and the one that appears in the latest Newsweek, makes this a truly amazing event, and a news story in and of itself. At last, the truth about our President and his agenda are starting to trickle through the protective wall built around him by the liberal media....
I Too Have Become Disillusioned
By Matt Patterson (Newsweek Columnist � Opinion Writer)
Years from now, historians may regard the 2008 election of Barack Obama as an inscrutable and disturbing phenomenon, the result of a baffling breed of mass hysteria akin perhaps to the witch craze of the Middle Ages. How, they will wonder, did a man so devoid of professional accomplishment beguile so many into thinking he could manage the world's largest economy, direct the world's most powerful military, execute the world's most consequential job?
Imagine a future historian examining Obama's pre-presidential life: ushered into and through the Ivy League, despite unremarkable grades and test scores along the way; a cushy non-job as a "community organizer;" a brief career as a state legislator devoid of legislative achievement (and in fact nearly devoid of his attention, less often did he vote "present"); and finally an unaccomplished single term in the United States Senate, the entirety of which was devoted to his presidential ambitions.
He left no academic legacy in academia, authored no signature legislation as a legislator. And then there is the matter of his troubling associations: the white-hating, America-loathing preacher who for decades served as Obama's "spiritual mentor;" a real-life, actual terrorist who served as Obama's colleague and political sponsor. It is easy to imagine a future historian looking at it all and asking: how on Earth was such a man elected president?
Not content to wait for history, the incomparable Norman Podhoretz addressed the question recently in the Wall Street Journal: To be sure, no white candidate who had close associations with an outspoken hater of America like Jeremiah Wright and an unrepentant terrorist like Bill Ayers, would have lasted a single day. But because Mr. Obama was black, and therefore entitled in the eyes of liberal Dom to have hung out with protesters against various American injustices, even if they were 'a bit' extreme, he was given a pass. Let that sink in: Obama was given a pass - held to a lower standard because of the color of his skin.
Podhoretz continues: And in any case, what did such ancient history matter when he was also so articulate and elegant and (as he himself had said) "non-threatening," all of which gave him a fighting chance to become the first black president and thereby to lay the curse of racism to rest?
Podhoretz puts his finger, I think, on the animating pulse of the Obama phenomenon - affirmative action. Not in the legal sense, of course. But certainly in the motivating sentiment behind all affirmative action laws and regulations, which are designed primarily to make white people, and especially white liberals, feel good about themselves.
Unfortunately, minorities often suffer so that whites can pat themselves on the back. Liberals routinely admit minorities to schools for which they are not qualified, yet take no responsibility for the inevitable poor performance and high drop-out rates which follow. Liberals don't care if these minority students fail; liberals aren't around to witness the emotional devastation and deflated self-esteem resulting from the racist policy that is affirmative action. Yes, racist. Holding someone to a separate standard merely because of the color of his skin - that's affirmative action in a nutshell, and if that isn't racism, then nothing is.
And that is what America did to Obama. True, Obama himself was never troubled by his lack of achievements, but why would he be? As many have noted, Obama was told he was good enough for Columbia despite undistinguished grades at Occidental; he was told he was good enough for the US Senate despite a mediocre record in Illinois; he was told he was good enough to be president despite no record at all in the Senate. All his life, every step of the way, Obama was told he was good enough for the next step, in spite of ample evidence to the contrary.
What could this breed if not the sort of empty narcissism on display every time Obama speaks? In 2008, many who agreed that he lacked executive qualifications nonetheless raved about Obama's oratory skills, intellect, and cool character. Those people � conservatives included - ought now to be deeply embarrassed.
The man thinks and speaks in the hoariest of clich�s, and that's when he has his Teleprompters in front of him; when the prompter is absent he can barely think or speak at all. Not one original idea has ever issued from his mouth - it's all warmed-over Marxism of the kind that has failed over and over again for 100 years. (An example is his 2012 campaign speeches which are almost word for word his 2008 speeches)
And what about his character? Obama is constantly blaming anything and everything else for his troubles. Bush did it; it was bad luck; I inherited this mess. Remember, he wanted the job, campaigned for the task. It is embarrassing to see a president so willing to advertise his own powerless-ness, so comfortable with his own incompetence. (The other day he actually came out and said no one could have done anything to get our economy and country back on track). But really, what were we to expect? The man has never been responsible for anything, so how do we expect him to act responsibly?
In short: our president is a small-minded man, with neither the temperament nor the intellect to handle his job. When you understand that, and only when you understand that, will the current erosion of liberty and prosperity make sense. It could not have gone otherwise with such an impostor in the Oval Office.
December 3, 2013, 12:15 pmHardcore Obama...
Hardcore Obama Supporters: Condescending, Patronizing - Racist
Here is Allan West
Lowering standards or making excuses for blacks, other minority groups - or women for that matter - is the most insidious form of racism or sexism. And yet, this is what the liberal Left continues to do.
On balance, what else can one conclude?
Watergate ruined Richard Nixon.
"Read my lips: no new taxes" cost George H.W. Bush his reelection.
Iran-Contra nearly destroyed the Reagan second term.
Katrina's incompetent local and state reactions, coupled with a tardy federal effort ended the viability of George W. Bush in his second term.
(2) Keepgate: " ... keep your plan. Period"
(3) ATFgate: Fast and Furious,
(4) APgate: monitoring the Associated Press
(5) Spygate: NSA spying
(6) Lawgate: judicial "discretion"
President Obama gets a pass. Why is he held to a lesser standard?
Read more: http://www.americanthinker.com/blog/2013/12/hardcore_obama_supporters_condescending_patronizing_-_racist.html#ixzz2mQu6Erwf
Follow us: @AmericanThinker on Twitter | AmericanThinker on Facebook
December 1, 2013, 7:30 pmSlow Dance... Must Read
is a poem
written by a teenager with cancer.
She wants to
see how many
people get her poem.
It is quite the poem
Please pass it
poem was written by a terminally ill young girl in a
It was sent
a medical doctor -
Make sure to read what is in the closing statement
Have you ever
On a merry-go-round?
Or listened to
Slapping on the ground?
Ever followed a
butterfly's erratic flight?
Or gazed at the sun into the
You better slow down.
Time is short.
Do you run through each day
When you ask How are you?
Do you hear
When the day is done
Do you lie
With the next hundred chores
Don't dance so
The music won't
Ever told your
We'll do it
And in your
Let a good
never had time
better slow down.
The music won't
When you run
so fast to get somewhere
miss half the fun of getting
When you worry and hurry
It is like an unopened
Life is not a
Do take it
Before the song is
E-MAILS ARE TRACKED TO OBTAIN THE TOTAL
PLEASE pass this mail on to everyone you know -
even to those you don't
know! It is the request of a special girl who will soon
leave this world
due to cancer.
This young girl has 6 months left
and as her dying wish, she wanted to send a letter telling everyone to
live their life to the fullest, since she never will.
never make it to prom, graduate from high school,
or get married and have a
family of her own.
By you sending
this to as many people as
possible, you can give her and her family a
little hope, because with every name
that this is sent to, The American
Cancer Society will donate 3 cents per name
to her treatment and recovery
plan.. One guy sent this to 500 people! So I know
that we can at least send
it to 5 or 6. It's
not even your money, just
PLEASE PASS ON AS A LAST REQUEST.
November 30, 2013, 9:23 pmMiss Kitty's prs. wk 12-1
14 15 16 17 19
23 27 29
34 36 38
66 67 68 69
November 30, 2013, 8:18 pmThe Bad-Faith Presidency...
Saturday, November 30, 2013 8:02:04 PM � by upchuck � 1 replies
Politico ^ | Nov 26, 2013 | Rich Lowery
At the end of the day, the root of President Obama's mendacity on Obamacare was simple: He didn't dare tell people how the law would work. He couldn't tell people how the law would work. Forthrightness was the enemy. It served no useful purpose and could only bring peril, and potentially defeat. It had to be banished. Instead of candor, Obama made the sale on the basis of dubious blandishments and outright deceptions... According to Mark Halperin and John Heilemann, the authors of Double Down, Obama brought up climate change in a political strategy meeting in 2011 as an example...
November 27, 2013, 1:48 pmPoll - Obama viewed as biggest failure..
Rankings released by YouGov/Economist show that Ronald Reagan is viewed as the greatest president of the last 100 years, while Obama is viewed as the "biggest failure."
The poll asked respondents "to rate each president [since Theodore Roosevelt] in six categories: great, near great, average, below average, failure, and don't know."
Results showed that Reagan bested Franklin D. Roosevelt (FDR) and John F. Kennedy (JFK) in a tight race for the top spot. 32 percent of the respondents categorized Reagan as "great," while 31 percent labeled FDR "great" and 30 percent chose JFK.
When it came to ranking presidents viewed to be a "failure," Jimmy Carter and Richard Nixon fared better than Obama.
Of those polled, 22 percent of respondents rated Carter a "failure," while 30 percent gave that same ranking to Nixon. But Obama took first place at the bottom of the list, with 37 percent of respondents choosing him as the biggest "failure" of all.
Follow AWR Hawkins on Twitter @AWRHawkins.
November 24, 2013, 11:01 pmObama named to
GQ"s Least Influential List
17. President Obama
He can blame Republicans in Congress all he likes and get away with it because congressional Republicans are the worst. But the fact remains that I have spent the majority of this man's presidency watching bad things happen, then hearing a thoughtful speech about how we gotta make sure the bad things never happen again, and then watching as nothing gets done. Next time there's an election, I want Nate Silver to analyze the data and tell me who to vote for so that I don't end up casting my ballot for a very eloquent hat stand.
November 23, 2013, 8:47 pmMiss Kitty's prs. wk. 11-24
November 21, 2013, 12:39 pmHand Dryer... heehee
Hand Dryer At Cracker Barrel
I was in the restroom at Cracker Barrel yesterday and someone had put this sticker on the hand dryer unit.
"Please press button to hear a brief message from our President".
November 18, 2013, 10:18 pmDisgusting little man...
s TruthRevolt reported on Friday evening, Martin Bashir of MSNBC suggested that former Alaska Governor Sarah Palin deserved to have someone "p*ss" and "s***" in her mouth thanks to her comments comparing the racking up of the federal debt to enslavement of future generations. Today Bashir opened his show by apologizing for his disgusting remarks.
Last Friday, on this broadcast, I made some comments which were deeply offensive and directed at Governor Sarah Palin. I wanted to take this opportunity to say sorry to Mrs. Palin and to also offer an unreserved apology to her friends and family, her supporters, our viewers, and anyone who may have heard what I said.
My words were wholly unacceptable. They were neither accurate, nor fair. They were unworthy of anyone who would claim to have an interest in politics. And they have brought shame upon my friends and colleagues at this network, none of whom were responsible for the things that I said.
And at a place where we try every day to elevate political discourse, and to focus on issues that matter to all of us. In the battle of ideas, America leads the world in wholehearted discussions and disagreements. And these arguments can be heard on a daily basis.
But what I did on Friday had absolutely nothing whatsoever to do with that great tradition. And I am deeply sorry.