AARP- American Association of Retired People
Questions and Answers from
AARP Forum
Q:         Where can single men over the age of 70 find
younger women who are interested in them?
     
A:         Try a bookstore, under
FICTION.
Q:         What can a man do while his wife is going
through menopause?
     
A:         Keep busy. If you're handy with tools, you can
finish the basement.  When you're done, you will have a place to
live.
Q:         Someone has told me that menopause is
mentioned in the bible... Is that true?
Where can it be
found?
     
A:         Yes. Matthew 14:92:
"And Mary rode
Joseph's ass all the way to Egypt
...."
Q:         How can you increase the heart rate of your
over-70 year-old husband?
     
A:         Tell him you're
pregnant.
Q:         How can you avoid that terrible curse of the
elderly wrinkles?
     
A:         Take off your
glasses.
Q:         Seriously! What can I do for these crow's feet
and all those wrinkles on my face?
     
A:         Go braless. It will usually pull them
out..
Q:         Why should 70-plus year old people use valet
parking?
     
A:         Valets don't forget where they park your
car.
Q:         Is it common for 70-plus year olds to have
problems with  short term memory storage?
     
A:         Storing memory is not a problem. Retrieving it
is the problem.
Q:         As people age, do they sleep more soundly?
     
A:         Yes, but usually in the
afternoon.
Q:         Where should 70-plus year olds look for eye
glasses?
     
A:         On their
foreheads.
Q:         What is the most common remark made by 70-plus
year olds when they enter antique stores?
     
A:         "Gosh, I remember
these!"
SMILE,
You've still got your sense of
humor, haven't you?