ZIPLOC BAGS � male, because they hold everything in, but you can always see right through them.

SWISS ARMY KNIFE � male, because even though it appears useful for a wide variety of work, it spends most of its time just opening bottles.

KIDNEYS � female, because they always go to the bathroom in pairs.

SHOE � male, because it is usually unpolished, with its tongue hanging out.

COPIER � female, because once turned off, it takes a while to warm up. Because it is an effective reproductive device when the right buttons are pushed.  Because it can wreak havoc when the wrong buttons are pushed.

TIRE � male, because it goes bald and often is over inflated.

HOT AIR BALLOON � male, because to get it to go anywhere you have to light a fire under it...  and, of course, there's the hot air part.

SPONGES � female, because they are soft and squeezable and retain water.

WEB PAGE � female, because it is always getting hit on.

SUBWAY � male, because it uses the same old lines to pick people up.

HOURGLASS � male, because over time, the weight shifts to the bottom.

HAMMER � male, because it hasn't evolved much over the last 5,000 years, but it's handy to have around.

REMOTE CONTROL � female...

Ha!  You thought I'd say male.  But consider... it gives a man pleasure, he'd be lost without it, and while he doesn't always  know which button to press - he keeps trying.