Well,another Christmas is upon us. Every year it seems to come sooner, especially as you get older. You kinda start thinking, "how many do I have left?" at a certain point. You start thinking all kinds of things like that after you turn 50. Or maybe before, even. But I really started noticing these thoughts creeping in my mind in the last year or two.

Every year at this time I am conflicted about what to do for my fellow man for the holidays. Give here, give there. Is my money really going to the people or into some charity bigwig's pocket? It's getting very difficult to know who to support these days.  Last Christmas I went to the dollar store and bought 100 kid's gifts for one of our biggest charity's here in Sacramento,Loaves and Fishes. It's a big soup kitchen that serves one hot meal a day plus offers other help for our homeless. They have a school for the children. I brought presents like Jigsaw Puzzles, coloring books, crayons, educational things, nothing junky.

My aunt and I went into the darkest part of downtown to deliver the goods. It was somewhat of an eye opener. Of course I am always aware of the homeless in our city but it's different when you see lines of them all together streaming toward the soup kitchen. TONS of them walking, walking, some with blankets thrown over their shoulders, some on bikes loaded with garbage bags full of recyclables. The eye opening part is that this is going on less than 5 miles from my home. It's like a whole different world then what MY vision of Sacramento has always been.

Cut to last night: Streams and streams of CARS making their way slowly down the blocks of the Fab Forties in East Sac, my neck of the woods. I live just a few blocks from this part of the neighborhood, where Ronald Reagan lived while he was governor of California. I grew up here, know all these houses practically by heart. It turns into a spectacle around Christmas time because everyone puts up lights and somehow the word's gotten round that this is THEE place to go around Christmas. It's a shame, really. I've never gotten caught up in the hoopla but for the past week or so I've been watching a horse get harnessed up to a carriage from my front window in a store's parking lot that I can see from my house. The other night I saw 2 horses clopping by carrying a wagon with sparkling lights. No, I don't live in the country,lol, but it feels like it. I could have walked down to those Fab Forties but it was too chilly so I ventured out last night in the car to see what was going on.

Talk about eye opening. The same streets I used to ride my bike on for hours when I was a kid were now full of cars, horse drawn wagons and carriages, a mini old fire engine carrying people, huge bicycle thingys carrying a dozen or so people, shuttle buses and, gasp!, the kicker for me..LIMOUSINES! All traveling at a snail's pace. People walking in front of you crossing the streets. Cars parked everywhere clogging the streets. Droves of people walking  taking pictures in a ten block area. CHRISTMAS CHAOS in every direction you turn.

And for what? Christmas lights. Oh, yes, they do look pretty. But it's not THAT spectacular. I was underwhelmed, to be honest. Only a couple of the streets have lights hanging overhead from one side of the street to the other and not every house is lighted.

It just all seems so ridiculous to me. And especially when I think of my trip downtown last year and what's going on in those 5 miles from here. 

Ah, such is life. Who am I to begrudge someone renting a limo to cruise through and catch some Christmas spirit? I hope they got their money's worth.

It killed some of my spirit,though, to see our neighborhood turned into this brouhaha of excess. And only ONE manger scene I caught a glimpse of among all of this commercialism.

Call me Grinch,lol. My Christmas gift will be giving throughout next year when all this dies down and people still need a hot meal, not just for the holidays. Or I wish I could adopt a family who truly needed a Christmas. I've looked these up online before but it all seems so impersonal. You view families who want IPHONes for Christmas or other expensive doohickeys. I don't even have a cellphone and if you're that poor how are you going to pay to use that phone? I don't get it. What happened to books and puzzles and board games for the kids?

I guess my world is really from another time zone. But that's okay. It may be 2017 out there but in my house it's still around 1987.

Dad, you'd be so proud of me. He began every sentence with "30 years ago we...." and of course, my sister and I would groan. But now I'm just like him. We remember when things were simpler. And what's wrong with simple? Nothing in my book. I think it would do this world a ton of good to quit staring and scrolling on a hand held gadget all day long. Sometimes it makes me wonder what the NEXT 30 years will bring. Perhaps I won't be here by then and that might be a good thing too because I'm not much for change. 

And as my mind falters in my old age, I hope last night's images of those endless headlights prowling through the neighborhood gawking at a few Christmas lights are erased and the ones of me riding my bike down those same peaceful streets remain just like it was....30 YEARS AGO :)