Well,we're already here at Day 26. Mother's visit is zipping right along, faster than I thought. 

Let's see now...in (almost) 4 weeks we've been to the casinos 5 times. We've also been out grocery shopping (3 times), clothes shopping (2 times) Rite Aid shopping (3 times) and hit the SPCA charity book sale.

So far she has not mentioned about visiting any of her old girlfriends here in town or any relatives. Hmmm. I think MacGyver wins out on that front. He seems to keep her company enough. Lucky for her I have the entire series on DVD.

My mother loves eating out. A lot of people do. I'm not particularly one of them. Having worked in restaurants for 10 years in my younger days...well,let's just say...once you've seen what goes on behind the kitchen doors, it makes you think twice about sitting in a booth out front. It doesn't matter how high class or low class the restaurant is, there are a lot of things you just don't want to know.

Every time I ask my mother here at home if she's hungry, I get "No. Not really." She tells me she doesn't get hungry which is common for someone her age. For lunch, she'll have half a sandwich. For dinner we'll have fish or chicken with a little rice and lots of vegetables. She always acts like I'm giving her too much but that all changes when she's at a restaurant.... then it's anything goes!

Now I know why she doesn't eat much at home. (And I don't think it's my cooking because if it was that bad she'd be taking over the kitchen!)

No, she's storing up for when she goes out!

I thought she was going to hurt herself at the casino as she slowly made her way through a 6 inch high club sandwich that could choke a horse. I said, "You're not going to finish that whole thing, are you?" She goes "Why not? It's GOOOOOD."

You'd think she'd be as big as a house but amazingly she's not. Of course she has a little belly now but her legs and arms have remained trim and look just as I remember from my youth. And her neck and under her chin...no wrinkles or waddles or loose skin. No double chin! I can not believe sometimes that she's 80. Hope I hold up that well!

Yes, food makes my mother very happy,lol. Of course now that she's diabetic you can't get her out of the grocery store bakery. Growing up I never remember her eating many desserts. If she had a piece of cake, she'd always scrape off the frosting claiming it was "too sweet". Now she can't get enough of them! Fortunately the medicine she takes for her diabetes must be doing something right because her doctor informed us that she can't believe how well mom's doing on it. She got a clean bill of health before her visit here.

Last time I caught her cruising the bakery aisle I said, "no more sweets" and bought some pretzels for her instead. Those probably aren't the best alternative for a diabetic due to the carbs but it still has to be better than an apple turnover! (one of her faves)  Naturally she doesn't like the unsalted kind of pretzels like I do but the Bavarian ones, those bigger ones. So we got those.

The past few nights I've heard "sneaky" going in the cupboard and hearing a bag rattle after I'm in bed reading. I thought, "oh, she's getting her pretzels." Well, today when opening the "snack" drawer I found out it's NOT the pretzel bag that I've been hearing rattle. The brand new bag of baked Lay potato chips was opened and half gone. So that's what she's been up to.

I've also discovered that "TeeeeeeeRIFIC" and "DeeeeeeLICIOUS" are Mom's two new favorite words. I've heard them repeatedly,especially over the last few days. It is quite a departure from her old favorite words. They were all a bit more on the negative side. To hear her burst out with these exclamations is quite jarring,lol. 

I don't know how many times she's mentioned "Bud's Buffet" since she's been here. This is a place downtown she used to go for lunch sometimes when she worked. "Those thick pastrami sandwiches,deeeeeeeeeLICIOUS!"Can't stop hearing about it. So I bought some pastrami myself the other day and made some sandwiches for a quick dinner one night to go along with her potato salad.

Oh, did I tell you she made the potato salad? That was her big day. First "we"(me) had to bake the potatoes "because they make it taste better". (I couldn't tell the difference.) "We"(me) chopped the celery and pickles and olives and made the bacon. She cut up the potatoes and boiled eggs. All I can remember is her stirring and stirring and stirring that salad. Then she said, "Oh, I don't have the strength in my hands like I used to." It was a never ending stir and I finally had to finish it.

While we were eating, I went to get another fork but there weren't any because everything was dirty and I had just put the dishwasher on. She just can't admit it but the old ears are going. She goes, "Didn't you put that dishwasher on?" It was churning loudly away behind us in the kitchen. "It's on. You can't hear that?" She took a bite of her potato salad and said, "Oh, yeah. I hear it now." 

While at the book sale, we picked up about a dozen books. They were priced from 75 cents to a couple dollars apiece. When going to pay, the volunteer said "that'll be $15.32." She hands him $60. She thought he said $50.32. But, "I can hear just fine."

One day when she was playing Solitaire on the computer I thought I'd see if she'd like to listen to the Downton Abbey soundtrack. The music is incredibly beautiful so I put the disc in the computer. 

Came back a few minutes later and said, "You like that?"

She turns around all frowny and says, "What is this?!"

I'd already told her when turning it on but I said it again, "It's Downton Abbey."

Then she shouts, "WHO??!" 

She's gripping a blanket throw around her neck like it's 40 degrees. In reality it is 80 degrees. These are the moments when I realize she is a "little ole lady". LOL.
 

"It sounds like the Sugar Plum Fairy from the Nutcracker...doot de doot de doot..."

I left and returned a few minutes later. She didn't hear me behind her. I could see she was really concentrating on the game and wasn't paying one iota of attention to the music. She turned around and look startled like she got caught and then she started moving her head back and forth and going..."doot de doot de doot" again like she was really listening. Phony baloney,lol.

Now we are on the Honey Baked Ham kick. Mom loves ham. My grandmother used to say,"I was born with a piece of ham in my mouth". That must be where she gets it from. I can take it or leave it but she's been bugging about it since she arrived. 

"You have one of those here?"

Here.

Like HERE wasn't home for most of her life. Like she's somewhere foreign!

"They still have "Po Folks?" she asked on the way to the mall. That was out of business in the 80's. Sometimes she gives me a real blast to the past, recalling things I barely remember as a child. Po Folks was a diner type restaurant that we went to a couple of times. They served drinks in Mason jars,that's all I remembered. Most things she remembers here are gone now. Even in my lifetime it's crazy the things that have come and gone that I grew up with. 

Along with the ears, we also cannot see very well but I've yet to see her wear her glasses. And I know she's been to the eye doctor recently because the girl who adjusts the glasses is..."TeeeeeeeeeRIFIC!" 

She comes out of her room holding up her sunglasses before we leave for one of our casino jaunts.

"I can't find my case, you know that red one?"

I said, "It's probably in your purse."

She said "I looked there already". And then she went chattering away back into the bedroom.

Her purse is on the dining room chair. I opened it and the case is staring right at me.

But, "Huh! I see just fine."

My cousin ventured out with us on this particular trip. We all decided to meet at 4:30 at the buffet. Around that time I happened to pass her on my way over and so I took her arm and helped her up. As we're walking,she's gripping her purse in front of her and the whole way to the buffet she's pointing and complaining.."That machine? Uh! Worthless!" Then another machine got called out for being "stingy". This went on the whole way. 

We get in line and don't have to wait long. I told her to get a piece of turkey because even if the machines are tight, the food is delicious,particularly the turkey. I didn't see everything on her plate until we sat down. But, oh, we haven't sat down yet. She's still looking around at the food and gets all excited.

"Oh, they have garlic bread. Wait'll I show Chris!" She's muttering something about how she wants to tell him about it. So she takes a piece but doesn't put it on her plate. She's holding it instead and taking a bite as we're walking towards our table. I see she's holding the plate kind of tipped, like her wrist is weak and it looked like all the food was ready to slide off it.

I said, "Watch the plate,Mom..." Meanwhile our waiter is asking us what we want to drink as we're walking up to the table. I was saying "a glass of milk" when I heard this commotion going on.

"Ah!" I hear and "Oooof!" Then that airy sound you hear when you sit down in a booth.

I look from the waiter over at mom who was sort of tipping into the booth with her face all  disappointed and there was Cousin Chris ducked under the table.   

The garlic bread wound up under the table, of course. I don't know exactly when it fell but the waiter started giggling watching my cousin trying to get it, and I was all standing there like..."uhhhhhh" and then mom was saying...."I just wanted to tell him...." (about the bread, I'm sure. She didn't finish the sentence because by now she was ducking under the table trying to get it.) Someone finally came up with the "minus-one-bite" culprit and my mother heaves a big sigh because her plans of sharing the news about the garlic bread to Cousin Chris got all fouled up. Then she laughed and we started our dinner. 

She's got a piece of fried chicken,a piece of turkey...."because you told me to get some of that turkey." she emphasises out of the side of her mouth like she was perturbed. (She's not a big turkey fan) She also had a stuffed cabbage roll with ground meat,another piece of teriyaki chicken and 2 spare ribs. My mother,the Cavewoman. 

She polished that off and went back for more. She comes back to the table and I see her mouth already chewing again.

This time she had some beef stew and some General Tao's chicken. We started having a conversation about some dish I was thinking of making when she cuts me right off and holding up a forkful of stew busts in with "There's not an ounce of fat on this meat! It's SOOOOO good." I didn't bother finishing the conversation. I know by now that the meat will win out over me every time. 

On the way home from the casino that night, Cousin Chris mentioned about going to Sam's club the next day. Then he was laughing and kidding around about going to the Red Hawk casino because Sam's is just a few miles from there. Well, you know that was the only thing Mom heard. I said,"Yeah,we'll drop mom off at the Hawk and do our shopping,hahaha." 

The next morning she came up to me and kept milling around. She was planning on coming with us to Sam's."Was he thinking about going to Red Hawk today?" she asked. And I said, "I don't think so. We're just going to pick up a few things."

All of a sudden she didn't seem in such a hurry to get dressed.

Then she says,"Welllllllllllllll....... I don't think I'll go with you then."

I guess that broke it,lol. It was all over for her when she found out that the casino wasn't on the agenda. 

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"Did you say something?" I hear this a lot. "No" I always say. "I heard a 'ding!'. Was someone leaving you a message?"  There is no 'ding' when someone leaves a message on the answering machine.  "Oh,that must be outside" is her explanation.

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I decided to take the long route to the SPCA book sale yesterday. Could've gotten on the freeway but then I would have missed out on my mother's latest act...The Talking Billboard.

....."Bella Bru Cafe"......I hear this as I'm driving. Real low...under her breath-like.

I'm trying to talk to her about some of the places that have been torn down or closed since she's been here last.

....."Shannon's Place,that's still there"....

...."Raley's"......

....."What a Pizza...that's a funny name."

At a stoplight a big red truck stops right next to us with a sign on the drivers door.

....."BOB's Towing, Sacramento California!" she exclaims with proud accomplishment.

I groan internally. Is she really trying to prove she doesn't need glasses? 

By the time I hear

....."home of the Whopper"....in a tinny high little girl's voice I am glad we have arrived.

After we get back in the car at the book sale, she straps on the seatbelt, sits up and says,"How far are we from Redhawk? hee hee. We can go get some lunch. hee hee"

Something tells me she's not kidding.

"Uh,we can go up to the freeway and cut over." I say,surprised. We'd just been there the day before.

We start driving but I wanted go home and change clothes. I think I said this but between her ears or her attention span, my words get lost in the car.

As we're driving for awhile she leans forward and says, "Where's the cut off? Haven't we gotten there yet?"

I had to tell her again that we were on our way home first.

It wasn't long before we were on the road again. I was bracing for the Talking Freeway Billboard act to come on but it didn't. We were there in a snap and she couldn't wait to get to the Sky Rider machine. I left her there and wandered around. Played many many machines. Lost almost $500. Was down to my last $50 when the White Orchid machine came alive. I sat on there for 2 hours and cashed out at $500.55. Wow. So all in all a great day even if I only made $.55. That's a winning day at the casino,lol.

Then we hit the buffet. My carnivorous mother tore into the food finishing with a slice of Boston Cream pie and a piece of sugar free chocolate cake. (Just for show)

I called my sister and told her about this. She was laughing and saying, "Oh good. I'm glad she's living it up on her vacation. Because when she gets back here, it's back to business." That means...no more sweets. Limited red meat. No going out every single day. Of course my sister takes her to the casino in OK since there's no gambling in TX so it's not like she's completely deprived of fun. (Or food,for that matter,lol) 

But my mother does need a little discipline. She's like my child these days and I'm spoiling her. I never had children and thank goodness for that because now I think I would've made a terrible mother,lol. My children would have been brats! I have a hard time saying no.

So,Mom,live it up. Have a blast and we'll do it all over when we "meat" again!!