- Home
- Premium Memberships
- Lottery Results
- Forums
- Predictions
- Lottery Post Videos
- News
- Search Drawings
- Search Lottery Post
- Lottery Systems
- Lottery Charts
- Lottery Wheels
- Worldwide Jackpots
- Quick Picks
- On This Day in History
- Blogs
- Online Games
- Premium Features
- Contact Us
- Whitelist Lottery Post
- Rules
- Lottery Book Store
- Lottery Post Gift Shop
The time is now 7:55 am
You last visited
May 2, 2024, 7:42 am
All times shown are
Eastern Time (GMT-5:00)
Some Rodney jokes to lighten the mood.
Published:
I miss Rodney Dangerfield. He got no respect, I could relate.
My wife only has sex with me for a purpose. Last night she used me
to time an egg.
It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, Yet
she won't drink from my glass!
Last night my wife met me at the front door. She was wearing a sexy
negligee. The only trouble was, she was coming home.
A girl phoned me and said, "Come on over. There's nobody home."
I Went over. Nobody was home!
A hooker once told me she had a headache.
I went to a massage parlor. It was self service.
If it weren't for pickpockets, I'd have no sex life at all.
I was making love to this girl and she started crying. I said, "Are
you going to hate yourself in the morning?" She said, "No, I hate myself
now."
I knew a girl so ugly that she was known as a two-bagger. That's
when you put a bag over your head in case the bag over her head comes off.
I knew a girl so ugly, they use her in prisons to cure sex
Offenders.
& nbsp; My wife is such a bad cook, if we leave dental floss in the kitchen
the roaches hang themselves.
I'm so ugly I stuck my head out the window and got arrested for
mooning.
My wife only has sex with me for a purpose. Last night she used me
to time an egg.
It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, Yet
she won't drink from my glass!
Last night my wife met me at the front door. She was wearing a sexy
negligee. The only trouble was, she was coming home.
A girl phoned me and said, "Come on over. There's nobody home."
I Went over. Nobody was home!
A hooker once told me she had a headache.
I went to a massage parlor. It was self service.
If it weren't for pickpockets, I'd have no sex life at all.
I was making love to this girl and she started crying. I said, "Are
you going to hate yourself in the morning?" She said, "No, I hate myself
now."
I knew a girl so ugly that she was known as a two-bagger. That's
when you put a bag over your head in case the bag over her head comes off.
I knew a girl so ugly, they use her in prisons to cure sex
Offenders.
& nbsp; My wife is such a bad cook, if we leave dental floss in the kitchen
the roaches hang themselves.
I'm so ugly I stuck my head out the window and got arrested for
mooning.
The other day I came home and a guy was jogging, naked. I asked
"Why?" He said "Because you came home early."
My wife's such a bad cook, the dog begs for Alka-Seltzer.
I know I'm not sexy. When I put my underwear on I can hear the
Fruit-of-the-Loom guys giggling.
My wife is such a bad cook, in my house we pray after the meal.
My wife likes to talk on the phone during sex; she called me from
Chicago last night.
Comments
My wife asked me to take the garbage out.
I said you cooked it you take it out.
I have no sex life..... Last night I asked a hooker ...will you show me a good time for a hundred bucks.
She said not on the first date.
His buggy eyes just got my gut hurting from laughing so hard....
Post a Comment
Please Log In
To use this feature you must be logged into your Lottery Post account.
Not a member yet?
If you don't yet have a Lottery Post account, it's simple and free to create one! Just tap the Register button and after a quick process you'll be part of our lottery community.
Register