On your last entry, what konane said... I can relate to. My daughter had some bad things happen to her when she was still in diapers. Full of regret and self blame and mourning, I kept picturing myself picking her up and giving her kisses and hugs and feeding her cookies and milk. The very day after I decided that was how I was going to overcome those awful feelings, she said "looking back on memories from my childhood, it all seems like it never even really happened."
I never told her about my mourning and beating myself up about it all. My husband was right, there really was nothing I could do about it that I didn't already do. So I know, that my change of perception somehow helped heal her too. Of course, all that constant prayer and begging for healing couldn't have hurt either!

AMEN....! Don't look for anything in return, if you didn't give it out in the first place.