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Home › Blogs › jarasan's Blog › Notice to all employees.

Notice to all employees.

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Subject:    Notice to all your company name here employees  - A  profound statement of  HOPE!



Notice to All your company name here Employees

 

As of November 5, 2008, when President Barry Obama is officially elected into office, our company will instill a few new policies which are in keeping with his new, inspiring issues of change and fairness:

 

1. All salespeople will be pooling their sales bonuses into a common pool that will be divided equally between all of you.  This will serve to give those of you who are underachieving a "fair shake". 

 

2. All low level workers will be pooling their wages, including overtime, into a common pool, dividing it equally amongst you.  This will help those who are "too busy for overtime" to reap the rewards from those who have more spare time and can work extra hours.

 

3. All top management will now be referred to as "the government."  We will not participate in this "pooling" experience because the law doesn't apply to us.

 

4. The "government" will give eloquent speeches to all employees every week, encouraging its workers to continue to work hard "for the good of all."

 

5. The employees will be thrilled with these new policies because it's "good to spread the wealth."  Those of you who have underachieved will finally get an  opportunity; those of you who have worked hard and had success will feel more "patriotic".

 

6. The last few people who were hired should clean out their desks.  Don't feel bad though, because President Barry Obama will give you free health care, free handouts, free oil for heating your home, free food stamps, and he'll let you stay in your home for as long as you want even if you can't pay your mortgage.  If you appeal directly to our democratic congress, you might even get a free flat screen TV and a coupon for free haircuts (shouldn't all Americans be entitled to nice looking hair?)!!!

 

If for any reason you are not happy with the new policies, you may want to rethink your vote on November 4th.

Entry #98

Comments

Avatar lank -
#1
I guess you dont like Obama
Avatar jarasan -
#2
@lank; I've never met Obama, but I am not fond of a candidate that is not "CANDID". He has thrown so many under the bus he would need a very large tow truck to pull the bus off the pile. If you read Saul Alinsky's book Rules for Radicals you will see how Obama fits into the orchestrated seizing of a govt..

Obama has to hide all his buddies, McCain is an open book with a very long tangible record.   Obama has a claim to fame by voting "present" as a state senator over a hundred times.....

Oh yeah let's not forget that Obama became a multi-millionaire during the "BUSH" years.
Avatar TigerAngel -
#3
Most excellent and true post. Did you write it? Keep up the good fight. Some ppl are waking up, don't give up. Good job! I'll have to check out that book.
Avatar pacattack05 -
#4
I just love listening or reading all the political nerds point fingers at each other. As if the republicans can do no wrong. What a circus.

I wish you could hear yourselves.

Jarasan, I think you should wake up and realize both parties are corrupt. If you really believe it's only the democrats who are the evil ones, and the republicans are angels, then you and the rest of all the other political nerds need your heads examined. This goes for the democrat nerds too.

I know you'll probably reply with some ill attempt, savvy comment, but there is nothing you or anyone else can say that'll overshadow what I stated above, which so obvious.

You people are just as bad or worse than the sports nerds I hear at work on sundays. All of them trying to convince why this team is so much better than the other...blah blah blah blah blah blah....

I'm sure you think that if Mcain is elected, your country will improve immediately, and all the problems will just fade away.

With all due respect Jarasan, buy a clue.
Avatar ochoop17 -
#5
Lank, I guess these people don't like Obama because he's not a Republican or is it ?
Avatar NBey6 -
#6
Score:
40 - 40
Avatar jarasan -
#7
I love it when I get your attention.

@pac; You're always right, I can't believe how insightful you've become. The Dalai Lama has nothing on you. Thanks for showing me the light, the illuminati has illuminated.

@ochoop17; I guess I wasn't clear, I don't dislike Obama personally. Unlike sports, this election can effect the future of USAmericans for a very long time. The agenda of the extreme left will be in control of the federal govt.. If you don't think that Obama, Pelosi, and Reid have a leftist/socialist agenda, you haven't been paying attention.   McCain has an agenda also, it has been clearly demonstrated for over thirty years, his agenda is centrist and inclusive. He reached across the aisle to the disdain of many a repub. that is a fact. Just look at the way Pelosi was wagging her finger during the bail-out proceedings, that is what you can expect if they get control, they will RULE by edict.
Avatar jarasan -
#8
I love it when I get your attention.

@pac; You're always right, I can't believe how insightful you've become. The Dalai Lama has nothing on you. Thanks for showing me the light, the illuminati has illuminated.

@ochoop17; I guess I wasn't clear, I don't dislike Obama personally. Unlike sports, this election can effect the future of USAmericans for a very long time. The agenda of the extreme left will be in control of the federal govt.. If you don't think that Obama, Pelosi, and Reid have a leftist/socialist agenda, you haven't been paying attention.   McCain has an agenda also, it has been clearly demonstrated for over thirty years, his agenda is centrist and inclusive. He reached across the aisle to the disdain of many a repub. that is a fact. Just look at the way Pelosi was wagging her finger during the bail-out proceedings, that is what you can expect if they get control, they will RULE by edict.
Avatar NBey6 -
#9
Score:
50 - 50
Avatar wiltay -
#10
I'm with you pacattack05, they are all corrupt. John McCain was a part of the corrption of the Keating Five in1989 which collapsed the Lincoln Savings and Loan. It collapsed in 1989 at a cost of over $3 billion! They defrauded some 23,000 Lincoln bondholders with an estimated total of about $160.1 billioin, about $124.6 of which we, the tax payers paid. Today, history seems to have repeated itself.   This has contributed to the financial crisis we are in now. Between 1986 and 1991 the number of new homes constructed per year dropped from 1.8 million to 1 million, the lowest rate since World War II. You can read about it at: wikipedia.org/wiki/Keating _Five.   Therefore, they are all corrupt. That's why we need to replace all of them that we can and keep changing them before they get the idea that they rule the world and the people don't matter, like they always do. The Keating Five consisted of Alan Cranston (D-CA), Dennis DeConcici (D- Arizona), John Glenn (D- Ohio),
John McCain (R- Arizona), and Donald W. Riegle (D- Michigan), so you see, they are all corrupt. The sad thing is, they always walk away with a tap on the hand. People need to start holding them responsible for their actions.
Avatar jme0823 -
#11
@Jarasan, that is a good joke you have written, and it is funny, but you are being sarcastic. You need to read the real issues instead of someone's column or opinion. What you are referring to is Earned Income Credit which was instituted by Ronald Reagan. Yes! He is a republican; it was then expanded by Bill Clinton, a democrat! It hasn't been touched since then. President Bush institued the Stimulus Checks which is the same thing in a different way. Sen. Obama wants to expand EIC more, and that is what they are calling "spreading wealth" around! So, when you file your taxes and claim EIC, you are getting some of that wealth. So, don't claim it when you file your income taxes since you think it is such a bad idea! Once again, that is a great joke to people who don't know any better!
Avatar jarasan -
#12
@jme0823: I've been paying attention to my taxes since Nixon. I would have never qualified for an EIC even if Nixon had it back then. The EIC is for those who qualify, one of the first criteria is having a dependent children if you earn less than 34K, no children less than 14K.

Here is the info: copy/paste to your address bar:

http://www.wwwebtax.com/credits/earned_income_credit.htm

The policy in the above blog entry is meant to be a satirical representation of socialist policies.
Avatar jme0823 -
#13
@Jarasan, I have never qualified for it either, but I would rather see them give it to an as you say "under achiever", than for them to spend it getting US Troops killed for nothing! Or bailing out corrupt CEO's and companies!
Avatar wiltay -
#14
What's so wrong with helping those in need?
Avatar jarasan -
#15
There is nothing wrong with helping those in need, we already do, everyday, all the time.

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