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The time is now 8:00 am
You last visited
April 25, 2024, 1:56 am
All times shown are
Eastern Time (GMT-5:00)
To my Southern friends and relatives ...
Published:
Came in email, hope you enjoy! Language may offend some so proceed at your own risk 'specially if you're not southern.
_______
To my Southern friends and relatives
Southern women know their summer weather report:
Humidity
Humidity
Humidity
Southern women know their vacation spots:
The beach
The rivuh
The crick
Southern women know everybody's first name:
Honey
Darlin'
Shugah
Southern women know the movies that speak to their hearts:
Fried Green Tomatoes
Driving Miss Daisy
Steel Magnolias
Gone With The Wind
Southern women know their religions:
Baptist
Methodist
Football
Southern women know their cities dripping with Southern charm:
Chawl'stn
S'vanah
Foat Wuth
N'awlins
Addlanna
Southern women know their elegant gentlemen:
Men in uniform
Men in tuxedos
Rhett Butler
Southern girls know their prime real estate:
The Mall
The Country Club
The Beauty Salon
Southern girls know the 3 deadly sins:
Having bad hair and nails
Having bad manners
Cooking bad food
More Suthen-ism's:
Only a Southerner knows the difference between a hissie fit and a
conniption fit, and that you don't "HAVE" them, you "PITCH" them.
_____
Only a Southerner knows how many fish, collard greens, turnip greens,
peas, beans, etc., make up "a mess."
_____
Only a Southerner can show or point out to you the general direction of
"yonder."
_____
Only a Southerner knows exactly how long "directly" is, as in: "Going to
town, be back directly."
_____
Even Southern babies know that "Gimme some sugar" is not a request for the
white, granular sweet substance that sits in a pretty little bowl in the
middle of the table.
_____
All Southerners know exactly when "by and by" is. They might not use the
term, but they know the concept well.
_____
Only a Southerner knows instinctively that the best gesture of solace for
a neighbor who's got trouble is a plate of hot fried chicken and a big
bowl of cold potato salad.
If the neighbor's trouble is a real crisis, they also know to add a large
banana puddin!
_____
Only Southerners grow up knowing the difference between "right near" and
"a right far piece." They also know that "just down the road" can be 1
mile or 20
_____
Only a Southerner, both knows and understands, the difference between a
redneck, a good ol' boy, and po' white trash.
_____
No true Southerner would ever assume that the car with the flashing turn
signal is actually going to make a turn.
_____
A Southerner knows that "fixin" can be used as a noun, a verb, or an adverb.
_____
Only Southerners make friends while standing in lines, ... and when we're
"in line,"... we talk to everybody!
_____
Put 100 Southerners in a room and half of them will discover they're
related, even if only by marriage.
_____
In the South, y'all is singular, all y'all is plural.
_____
Southerners know grits come from corn and how to eat them.
_____
Every Southerner knows tomatoes with eggs, bacon, grits, and coffee are
perfectly wonderful; that red eye gravy is also a breakfast food; and that
fried green tomatoes are not a breakfast food.
_____
When you hear someone say, "Well, I caught myself lookin'," you know you
are in the presence of a genuine Southerner!
_____
Only true Southerners say "sweet tea" and "sweet milk." Sweet tea
indicates the need for sugar and lots of it -- we do not like our tea
unsweetened. "Sweet milk" means you don't want buttermilk.
_____
And a true Southerner knows you don't scream obscenities at little old
ladies who drive 30 MPH on the freeway.
You just say,"Bless her heart"... and go your own way.
_____
To those of you who are still a little embarrassed by your Southerness:
Take two tent revivals and a dose of sausage gravy and call me in the
morning. Bless your heart!
________
And to those of you who are still having a hard time understanding all
this Southern stuff...bless your hearts, I hear they are fixin' to have
classes on Southernness as a second language!
_____
And for those that are not from the South but have lived here for a long
time, all y'all need a sign to hang on y'all's front porch that reads "I
ain't from the South, but I got here as fast as I could."
________
Southern girls know men may come and go, but friends are fahevah !
_______
Now Shugah, send this to someone who was raised in the South or wish they
had been! If you're a Northern transplant, bless your little heart, fake
it. We know you got here as fast as you could.
Comments
Those were funny...thanx...
grits with eggs over easy mixed together thats what I'm talkin about. Pass the shug-gah please...!
Lord oh mercy....! Red eye with biscuits....!!!!!!
http://shahrzaad.wordpress.com/2008/09/07/iranian-recipe-haleem/
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