Welcome Guest
( Log In | Register )
The time is now 1:42 pm
You last visited September 21, 2017, 1:39 pm
All times shown are
Eastern Time (GMT-5:00)

Southern Police: Funny


Last Edited: July 24, 2011, 11:24 pm

Hi everyone! Got this funny email today.
(........Have some family in law enforcement &
they've been known to pass along a cop joke now & then...lol...)
Have a good nite!
These are actual comments made by Southern Troopers that were taken off
their car videos:

1. "You know, stop lights don't come any redder than the one you just went

2. "Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll stretch

after you wear them awhile."

3. "If you take your hands off the car, I'll make your birth certificate a

worthless document."

4. "If you run, you'll only go to jail tired."

5. "Can you run faster than 1200 feet per second? Because that's the speed

of the bullet that'll be chasing you."

6. "You don't know how fast you were going? I guess that means I can write

anything I want to on the ticket, huh?"

7. "Yes, sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't think it

will help. Oh, did I mention that I'm the shift supervisor?"

8. "Warning! You want a warning? O.K., I'm warning you not to do that again

or I'll give you another ticket."

9. "The answer to this question will determine whether you are drunk or

not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?"

10. "Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a place where you go to

ride on rides, eat cotton candy and corn dogs and step in monkey poop."

11. "Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster oven."

12. "In God we trust; I don't think so, we run you all through NCIC." (National Crime

Information Center)

13. "Just how big were those 'two beers' you say you had?"

14. "I'm glad to hear that the Chief of Police is a personal friend of

yours. So then you know someone who can post your bail."


15. "You didn't think we gave pretty women tickets? You're right, we don't.
Sign here."      (OUCH!)
Entry #1


TenajComment by Tenaj - July 25, 2011, 12:00 am
my favorite: "If you run, you'll only go to jail tired."
sully16Comment by sully16 - July 25, 2011, 7:43 am
Comment by CashWinner$ - July 26, 2011, 9:13 pm
Thanks so much for commenting on my first blog entry Tenaj & sully!! You guys Rock (-: As soon as I figure out what the heck I'm doin' I'm gonna do more. Images are a real killer tho, so me & laptop are fighting! LOL -

You must be a Lottery Post member to post comments to a Blog.

Register for a FREE membership, or if you're already a member please Log In.