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A mortician was working late one night. It was

his job to examine the dead bodies before

they were sent off to be buried or cremated.

As he examined the body of Mr. Schwartz, who was
about to be cremated, he discovered the
longest private part he had ever seen!

"I'm sorry, Mr. Schwartz," said the mortician,
"But I can't send you off to be cremated with a
tremendously huge private part like this.
It has to be saved for posterity." And
with that the the mortician used his tools to
cut it off, and he stuffed his prize into a briefcase and
took it home. The first person he showed was his
wife.

"I have something to show you that you won't
believe," he said, and opened his briefcase.

,,,, "Oh, my God!" she screamed, "Schwartz is dead".