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ambelamba

Entertaiment Capital
United States
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April 19, 2006
302 Posts
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Dec 15, 2009, 2:32 am

I will be 34 next February. Before that I will be graduating from a state university this January. With a degree in fine art. And I feel that my skill level is very inadequate for my own standard.

I want to go back to Art Center College of Design in Pasadena after quitting it 11 years ago.

Now I know better. I became wiser and humble. I have grown up. And I have suffered the really nasty side of acts of god. Although I am not a Christian anymore, I feel like Job in the Old Testament. Yes, I've suffered some horrible failures in my life.

I know that I sound very arrogant, but I deserve to win.
lottocalgal

CA
United States
Member #57,220
December 23, 2007
587 Posts
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Dec 15, 2009, 9:39 am

Quote: Originally posted by ambelamba on Dec 15, 2009
I will be 34 next February. Before that I will be graduating from a state university this January. With a degree in fine art. And I feel that my skill level is very inadequate for my own standard.

I want to go back to Art Center College of Design in Pasadena after quitting it 11 years ago.

Now I know better. I became wiser and humble. I have grown up. And I have suffered the really nasty side of acts of god. Although I am not a Christian anymore, I feel like Job in the Old Testament. Yes, I've suffered some horrible failures in my life.

I know that I sound very arrogant, but I deserve to win.

Ambelamba,

I know you dont really want to hear this but even the most ardent christian have horrible trials in life. I never did drugs or partied or hurt people, and unlike the rest of my family paid my own way through college and tried to do the best with my life and yet had to struggle for every tiny accomplishment.

Just in the last 2 years I lost an $80k a year job as a mortgage underwriter and couldnt find a job for nearly 2 years. But guess what I HATED that huge salary job and was stressed and crying every day, especially toward the end of the mortgage crisis.

My depression got as close to suicide as you can get. I ended up going back to church in order to save my own life.

I prayed for a job and then almost without trying, I found a job that is not even HALF the salary but guess what I love it, have 0 stress , an 8 minute commute, Finally work in the IT department (that has eluded me for years) and for a boss whom I like.

It is not God whose trying to hurt or punish us, it just is. I think that I will win the lottery IF it is my destiny to do so. No one Deserves, anything we get in life, good or bad. Do babies deserve to be born blind or severly deformed? Do rapist and and criminals deserve to win the lottery? no they just do. Will were all born with a specific destiny to fullfill and we just have to find a way to get through it. My faith is what is getting me through mine because I know how dark I can get. I truly hope to win the lottery one day and truly believe I will. But I don't pray to God for it. Please remember that our winning the lottery may not be in Gods plan for us. Why? because winning may cause alot of ourselves or others as a result. Only God knows the outcomes of such things.

Since you used to be a christian then you know what we all truly DESERVE--we don't want that. Please keep this in mind. Life is simply a series of trials and lessons. Good luck to you, and please don't give up on God.
dr65

50

Pennsylvania
United States
Member #74,094
May 2, 2009
24,135 Posts
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Dec 15, 2009, 10:18 am

Quote: Originally posted by ambelamba on Dec 15, 2009
I will be 34 next February. Before that I will be graduating from a state university this January. With a degree in fine art. And I feel that my skill level is very inadequate for my own standard.

I want to go back to Art Center College of Design in Pasadena after quitting it 11 years ago.

Now I know better. I became wiser and humble. I have grown up. And I have suffered the really nasty side of acts of god. Although I am not a Christian anymore, I feel like Job in the Old Testament. Yes, I've suffered some horrible failures in my life.

I know that I sound very arrogant, but I deserve to win.

I feel, I want, I suffered, I deserve.

Get over it. A lot of people have suffered horrible failures/losses in their lives, you're not the only one.

It's the way they handle what they've been given or in your case, what you think you were not given.

You are about to graduate with a degree in Fine Art? If that's not good enough, find a way to go back to Pasadena, don't wait to win your way

back.

Since you reference Job, his family was taken away from him..he suffered physically, he suffered losses beyond any sense of loss most of us can feel

today - our own arrogance and desire to have things we think we deserve make what are very minimal losses seem monumental.

You know better, you became wiser and humble and have grown up?

I don't think so.

I think bitterness is not far behind what you are feeling now. Unless you get a better outlook on life, you may not deserve to win at all.
Raven62

25

New Jersey
United States
Member #17,842
June 28, 2005
180,983 Posts
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Dec 15, 2009, 11:56 am

Quote: Originally posted by ambelamba on Dec 15, 2009
I will be 34 next February. Before that I will be graduating from a state university this January. With a degree in fine art. And I feel that my skill level is very inadequate for my own standard.

I want to go back to Art Center College of Design in Pasadena after quitting it 11 years ago.

Now I know better. I became wiser and humble. I have grown up. And I have suffered the really nasty side of acts of god. Although I am not a Christian anymore, I feel like Job in the Old Testament. Yes, I've suffered some horrible failures in my life.

I know that I sound very arrogant, but I deserve to win.

When God created us, He put seeds of increase on the inside. We were never made to reach one level and stop. We were created to grow, to move forward, and to increase despite opposition that may come against us. Yet, all throughout life, there will be forces of darkness trying to work against you and push you down, limiting your influence and keeping you from taking any new ground. But you don't have to let it keep you down. You have the Almighty God living on the inside, and because of that, He anoints you do all things through His strength. His anointing on your life is just like oil; when something tries to stop you or hold you down, it doesn't have a chance; it will just slide off. If you're going to become everything God has created you to be, you can't get stuck in a rut and think you've reached your limits whenever opposition comes. You've got to keep stretching your faith, looking for new opportunities, new ideas, and new ways to expand your influence. You have to stand in faith, knowing the power of Almighty God in your life! God's spirit makes you uncontainable, but you have to rise up with a holy determination and release your faith so that nothing will keep you down because you know that the force in you, the Spirit of Almighty God, is far greater than any force in the world trying to contain you. Dare to take steps of faith and believe in God's uncontainable power inside of you.

Listen Here!

A mind once stretched by a new idea never returns to its original dimensions!

Catch-22: A dilemma or difficult circumstance from which there is no escape because of mutually conflicting or dependent conditions.

Corruptissima re publica plurimae leges: When the republic is at its most corrupt the laws are most numerous.

The best way to learn is to never stop being an Experiential Student!
fja

100

United States
Member #91
January 19, 2002
16,125 Posts
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Dec 15, 2009, 1:49 pm

"In life to be honest I've failed as much as I've I have succeeded.

But I love my wife, and I love my life,

and I wish you,,,,

My kind of success!" -Dickey Fox

"Everybody has to believe in something...I believe I'll have another beer!" = W.C.Fields
jesjam

United States
Member #83,766
December 14, 2009
8 Posts
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Dec 15, 2009, 8:48 pm

Quote: Originally posted by ambelamba on Dec 15, 2009
I will be 34 next February. Before that I will be graduating from a state university this January. With a degree in fine art. And I feel that my skill level is very inadequate for my own standard.

I want to go back to Art Center College of Design in Pasadena after quitting it 11 years ago.

Now I know better. I became wiser and humble. I have grown up. And I have suffered the really nasty side of acts of god. Although I am not a Christian anymore, I feel like Job in the Old Testament. Yes, I've suffered some horrible failures in my life.

I know that I sound very arrogant, but I deserve to win.

And I have suffered the really nasty side of acts of god.

What kind of acts?
ambelamba

Entertaiment Capital
United States
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April 19, 2006
302 Posts
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Dec 16, 2009, 12:00 am

Quote: Originally posted by jesjam on Dec 15, 2009
And I have suffered the really nasty side of acts of god.

What kind of acts?

It's really hard to explain.

See, I stopped believing in god because I came to realize that someone that almighty can't be moral or good. I came to a fearful revelation that a personal God can't be moral because he has no restriction or restraints. But being a maltheist is very stressful, so I decided to abandon the belief of god to preserve my sanity.
jwhou

United States
Member #83,698
December 13, 2009
225 Posts
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Dec 24, 2009, 3:53 pm

Quote: Originally posted by ambelamba on Dec 15, 2009
I will be 34 next February. Before that I will be graduating from a state university this January. With a degree in fine art. And I feel that my skill level is very inadequate for my own standard.

I want to go back to Art Center College of Design in Pasadena after quitting it 11 years ago.

Now I know better. I became wiser and humble. I have grown up. And I have suffered the really nasty side of acts of god. Although I am not a Christian anymore, I feel like Job in the Old Testament. Yes, I've suffered some horrible failures in my life.

I know that I sound very arrogant, but I deserve to win.

No matter how much you "deserve" to win, someone deserves it more. There's a lot of suffering in the world and regardless of our trials, we are still very blessed. In 2001, the Doctors expected me to be dead within two to five years, does that mean I deserve anything? If you do win, it would be what you do with the winnings that will determine how deserving you are not what you have suffered through so far.
PERDUE

Monkey Butt, USA
United States
Member #54,567
August 23, 2007
1,124 Posts
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Dec 25, 2009, 4:04 pm

Quote: Originally posted by ambelamba on Dec 15, 2009
I will be 34 next February. Before that I will be graduating from a state university this January. With a degree in fine art. And I feel that my skill level is very inadequate for my own standard.

I want to go back to Art Center College of Design in Pasadena after quitting it 11 years ago.

Now I know better. I became wiser and humble. I have grown up. And I have suffered the really nasty side of acts of god. Although I am not a Christian anymore, I feel like Job in the Old Testament. Yes, I've suffered some horrible failures in my life.

I know that I sound very arrogant, but I deserve to win.

I have a question for you........

Did you suffer from bad decisions you made or were you a true victim of acts of GOD?

When we are in the process of paying our dues for bad decisions, it is always convienent to blame GOD for our woes-troubles-hard times-etc......

When we are reaping the benefits of our good decidions it is convenient to omit giving GOD credit for our success.

You said yourself that you quit the Art Center College of Design in Pasadena 11 years ago. That was a decision you made that you now regret.

You are in the process of graduating from a state university in January, with a degree in fine art and you feel that your skill level is very inadequate for your own standard.

Once again a decision you made and saw through to the end.

I've learned during my many-many-moons in existance that when it is something you really want you get it no matter the obstacles. I've seen it with myself and many many others.

You say you deserve to win.............

If you believe that, then you will do what you know you have to do, and win.

Those that can, DO!!!

Those that can't, TALK ABOUT IT!!!

Are you a do'er or a dreamer? What creative actions are you backing your words with? What is your level of confidence in yourself and your skills? These are questions only you can answer. Only you know the true nature of yourself and your situation.

What do you intend to do to incrase your skill level to your standard?

Remember:

An excuse is like an azzhole. Everybody's got one.

⭐The inner machinations of my mind is an enigma.

----------Patrick Star
tiggs95

United States
Member #47,419
November 4, 2006
3,930 Posts
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Dec 25, 2009, 9:08 pm

I don't understand people who say thank you God for letting me hit the lottery when they hit..If God was here he would tell you not to gamble..He would say I'm not helping you in anyway so if you do gamble it's up to you if you win or lose..I'm sure he would say good luck cause that's what it is,luck...
Set4life

East Hampton, NY
United States
Member #41,994
June 25, 2006
1,137 Posts
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Dec 25, 2009, 9:40 pm

<snip> drugs are bad!!! i wonder if he is really 34 yrs old..must be a bad fart joke.

This post has been automatically changed by the Lottery Post computer system to remove inappropriate content and/or spam.

$$

FOR THE WIN!
Dollar419

Huntersville, NC
United States
Member #71,157
February 20, 2009
654 Posts
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Dec 26, 2009, 11:35 pm

Quote: Originally posted by ambelamba on Dec 16, 2009
It's really hard to explain.

See, I stopped believing in god because I came to realize that someone that almighty can't be moral or good. I came to a fearful revelation that a personal God can't be moral because he has no restriction or restraints. But being a maltheist is very stressful, so I decided to abandon the belief of god to preserve my sanity.

You really need to explain why you have lost your faith in GOD--when that is the only thing to believe in and to hold on too. God is almighy, moral and good and you need to read chapter and versus the entire book of Job to see just what he went through. You cannot compare his situation to yours yet, he endured at the end with stronger faith and will. KEEP ON PRAYING AND DON'T GIVE UP YOUR DREAM NO MATTER WHAT LIFE THROWS IN YOUR FACE.
pumpi76

Honduras
Member #20,981
August 29, 2005
4,715 Posts
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Dec 27, 2009, 11:51 am

are you a soldier? because TECHNICALLY soldiers SHOULD have the right to win the lotto or Powerball more than anybody else..

I´ve only heard of 1 soldier winning Powerball...

There are to be a lottos for soldiers...

what is soldiers, police officers and doctors and heads of state they have the the first right more than anyone else to win the lotto/Powerball...I think that should be in any country...

i ask because your location says: Afganistan...

The Forex trades: 1.6 Trillion dollars EVERY day, that´s more than the GDP of the Carribbean Central America, COMBINED. Enough to feed every crook out there for centuries...To all Geniuses & Powers Countries of the World the Planet needs breakthroughs in all Medicine, Veterinary, Biology related fields, Psychology, Population Psychology/Sociology..They need to genetically ingeneer new plants species/types to give more variety of plants and thus have more resources for combating diseases¨
rdgrnr

100

The Hall Of The Mountain Kings Tennessee
United States
Member #73,902
April 28, 2009
15,378 Posts
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Dec 27, 2009, 4:35 pm

Quote: Originally posted by pumpi76 on Dec 27, 2009
are you a soldier? because TECHNICALLY soldiers SHOULD have the right to win the lotto or Powerball more than anybody else..

I´ve only heard of 1 soldier winning Powerball...

There are to be a lottos for soldiers...

what is soldiers, police officers and doctors and heads of state they have the the first right more than anyone else to win the lotto/Powerball...I think that should be in any country...

i ask because your location says: Afganistan...

Heads of state have the first right more than anyone else to win the lotto/Powerball?

This ain't no banana republic pumpi. This is the United States of America, the greatest nation on Earth. We don't put up with dictators like Manuel Noriega. Heads of state are owed no special treatment in this country. Especially the one we have now.

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