THIS MAY COME AS A SURPRISE TO THOSE OF YOU NOT LIVING IN LAS
VEGAS, BUT THERE ARE MORE CATHOLIC CHURCHES THERE THAN CASINOS.
NOT SURPRISINGLY, SOME WORSHIPPERS AT SUNDAY SERVICES WILL GIVE CASINO CHIPS RATHER THAN CASH WHEN THE BASKET IS PASSED.
SINCE THEY GET CHIPS FROM MANY DIFFERENT CASINOS, THE CHURCHES HAVE DEVISED A METHOD TO COLLECT THE OFFERINGS.
THE CHURCHES SEND ALL THEIR COLLECTED CHIPS TO A NEARBY FRANCISCAN MONASTERY FOR SORTING AND THEN THE CHIPS ARE THEN TAKEN TO THE CASINOS OF ORIGIN AND CASHED IN.
THIS IS DONE BY THE CHIP MONKS.
YOU DIDN'T EVEN SEE IT COMING, DID YOU?

Guy gets on a plane and finds himself seated next to an attractive woman.  He immediately turns to her and makes his move. "You know," he says, "I've heard that flights will go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger. So let's talk."
The woman, who had just opened her book, closes it slowly and says to the guy, "What would you like to discuss?"
"Oh, I don't know," says the guy. "How about nuclear power?"
"OK," says the woman. "That could be an interesting topic. But let me ask you a question first. A horse, a cow, and a deer all eat the same stuff--grass. Yet the deer excretes little pellets, the cow turns out a flat patty, and the horse produces muffins of dried poop. Why do you suppose that is?"
The guy is dumbfounded. Finally he replies, "I haven't the slightest idea."
"So tell me," says the woman, "How is it that you feel qualified to discuss nuclear power when you don't know sh**?"

30 31 32

70 71 72

80 81 82

1 Gallon of Lemonade

20-24 small lemons

2 cups of sugar

1 gallon size pitcher

Juice lemons.  Add sugar.  Add 4 cups of Hot water.  Mix well so that all the sugar is melted.  Finally, fill gallon pitcher with Cold water.  Adjust lemonade to taste.

If anyone missed using my pairs for a C3 hit this week....have an ice cold glass of lemonade on me. 

 4 T Mayonnaise
4 T Finely chopped fresh basil
-leaves or 1 T dried basil
Black pepper to taste
2 Pita Pockets cut in half

Alfalfa Sprouts

4 oz Sliced cheese of your choice
1 Avocado, sliced
1 Tomato, thickly sliced
Combine mayonnaise, basil and pepper then spread inside each pocket. Next, stuff each pocket with avocado slices, tomato slices, alfalfa sprouts, and cheese,.
2 Servings

This is a great light summer sandwich.

28 23 29 21

98 93 99 91

78 73 79 71

One day, a man came home and was greeted by his wife dressed in a very Sexy nightie. "Tie me up," she purred, "and you can do anything you want." So he tied her up and went golfing.

And the best and the worst of this is

That neither is most to blame

If you have forgotten my kisses

And I have forgotten your name.

Algeron Charles Swinburne

Glories, like glow worms, afar off shine bright,

But look'd too near have neither heat nor light.

John Webster

54 58 50 44 48 40 34 38 30 06 11 62

97 91 99 77 71 73 01 07 09 76 61 92

Congratulations

Recently my goddaughter mastered her vaulting technique. Because she is small right now the size of the horse (vaulting apparatus) was so overwhelming to her but my little princess conquered her fears and leaped right over that equipment.  Great job princess.  She performed effortlessly and gracefully in mid air and made a clean landing. When she was given lemons, she made lemonade and I was there to enjoy it with her.  Keep up the good work baby girl, I'm so proud of you.

People Will Talk
You may to through this world, but ‘twill be slow
If you listen to all that is said as you go;
You'll be worried and fretted and kept in a stew,
For meddlesome tongues must have something to do,
For people will talk you know.
Samuel Dodge
PAIRS 6/24-7/1
58 48 38
54 44 34
50 40 30

Good Luck E1... Prosper

Apple Ginger Juice

1 apple (cored)

4-5 carrots (remove tops)

¼- ½ inch slice ginger root (peeled)

Sparkling Water or Unfiltered Apple Juice

Ice

Juice ginger root and carrots together or apple and ginger together.

• You'll miss all the good stuff if you try to juice the ginger alone.

Drink as is or dress it up a bit.

Pour juice mixture over ice add sparkling water or unfiltered apple juice.  Another way is to crush ice then add your juice mixture.  Hey why not make it into a slushie.  Yeah.  Just throw the juice mixture and ice in a blender, don't for get to add apple juice or sparkling water.  Ta Da.

Of course adjust mixture to your taste.  I love the ginger and apple.  So Good.

Pairs 6/24- 7/8

14 18 10

74 78 70

24 28 20

Antisthenes used to say that envious people were devoured by their own disposition, just as iron is by rust.

Actual Writings on Hospital Charts

G-Rated

• On the second day the knee was better, and on the third day it disappeared.
• The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.
• Discharge status: Alive but without my permission.
• Healthy appearing decrepit 69-year-old male, mentally alert but forgetful.
• The patient refused autopsy.
• Patient's medical history has been remarkably insignificant with only a 40-pound weight gain in the past three days.
• Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.
• She is numb from her toes down.
• While in ER, she was examined, x-rated and sent home.
• The skin was moist and dry.
• Occasional constant infrequent headaches.
• Patient was alert and unresponsive.
• She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life, until she got a divorce.
• I saw your patient today, who is still under our car for physical therapy.
• The patient was to have a bowel resection. However, he took a job as a stockbroker instead.
• Skin: somewhat pale but present.
• Patient was seen in consultation by Dr. Blank, who felt we should sit on the abdomen, and I agree.
• Patient has two teenage children but no other abnormalities