Sure Ways To Know you're A Woman

Published: June 1, 2007, 8:22 am

Sure Ways To Know You're A Woman

Whine.
If he pays attention to you, he is smothering you.
If he gives you space, he is ignoring you.
When asked if something is bothering you, you reply no. Then get pissed off when you are believed.
Become attracted to someone because he is outgoing and loves parties, start dating him and immediately expect him to stop this behavior.
Always take an hour longer than promised to prepare for the evening.
Demand to be treated as an equal in everything. Except when paying for meals, plane tickets, concerts, beers, etc. These are required gifts proving his love.
Declare PMS at any given time. If he is knowledgeable about your cycle, tell him you're irregular from all of the stress of your life.
If you are trying to sleep, it's because you're exhausted from your almost super-human level of daily achievement; if he is trying to sleep, it's because he is lazy.
Remember that any woman who so much as looks at your boyfriend must be labeled a whore and your network of friends must be informed immediately to spread this as quickly as possible.
Make his life miserable by making him feel guilty about doing anything other than catering to your needs.

Entry #43

Comments

justxploring - Jun 1, 2007, 6:38 pm

If you truly believe in what you posted, I feel sorry for you. Obviously you've had a terrible experience with bad relationships.

BTW, I have a great sense of humor, but not a single one of the 11 examples above apply to me and I have 2 breasts and a vagina. So I'm either a very deformed man or I'm 100% female!

One2Adore - Jun 12, 2007, 10:32 am

It's called a "JOKE". Laugh a little, it won't kill you. I'm a female and I didn't find anything on the list offensive. Rather, quite the opposite.

Sure Ways To Know you're A Woman

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