Been Home All Night


A man goes to a party and has too much to drink. His friends plead with him to let them take him home. He says no -- he lives only a mile away. About five blocks from the party, the police pull him over for weaving and tell him to get out of the car and "walk the line."

Just as he starts, the police radio blares out a notice of a robbery taking place just a few houses away. The police tell the "party animal" to stay put -- they'll be right back, and then they ran down the street to where the robbery took place.

The guy waits and waits for the police, but since they haven't returned, he decides to drive himself home. When he gets there, he tells his wife he is going to bed, and to tell anyone who might come looking for him that he has the flu and has been in bed all day.

A few hours later the police knock on the door. They ask if Mr. X lives there and his wife says yes. They ask to see him and she replies that he is in bed with the flu and has been so all day. The police have his driver's license in hand. Next they ask to see his car -- and she asks why? They insist on seeing his car, so she takes them to the garage and opens the door where they find: a police car, lights still flashing.