AARP Tips...


Questions and Answers from an AARP Forum

Q: Where can men over the age of 50 find
younger, sexy women who are interested
in them?

A: Try a bookstore...under fiction.




Q: What can a man do while his wife is
going through menopause?

A: Keep busy. If you're handy with tools,
you can finish the basement. When you are
done you will have a place to live.




Q: Someone has told me that menopause is
mentioned in the Bible.  Is that true?  Where
can it be found?

A: Yes.  Matthew 14:92: 'And Mary rode
Joseph's ass all the way to Egypt '




Q: How can you increase the heart rate of
your 50+ year old husband?

A: Tell him you're pregnant.




Q: How can you avoid that terrible curse of
the elderly...wrinkles?

A: Take off your glasses




Q: Seriously! What can I do for these
crow's feet and all those wrinkles on my
face?

A: Seriously?  Go braless.  It will usually pull
them out.


Q: Why should 50+ year old people use valet
parking?

A: Valets don't forget where they park your
car.



Q: Is it common for 50+ year olds to have
problems with short term memory storage?

A: Storing memory is not a problem,
retrieving it is a problem.



Q: As people age, do they sleep more
soundly?

A: Yes, but usually in the afternoon.


Q: Where should 50+ year olds look for eye
glasses?

A: On their foreheads.


Q: What is the most common remark made
by 50+ year olds when they enter antique
stores?

A: 'Gosh, I remember these.'