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I've come to a crossroad in my life. It is now time for me to make some changes. Although I'm very hopeful and excited about the changes that I MUST make in order to grow more as an individual; I'm also scared!!!  I know the changes that I'm NEEDING to take will help me heal my life, but I often forget about myself in an effort to make others happy while neglecting my own needs--now it is scary to stop enabling others (my family) and start taking care of myself.  It's time for me to lovingly walk away so I can finally take care of myself. 

I need to get enough money together to leave the home that was once mine and get an apartment.  I often feel that it's "not fair" that I have to leave my home, but living with my mother is not healthy for me.  She lost her home and I took her in, and now I'm ready after 2 years to walk away and leave her with my home and get an apartment because it's really not healthy for me to live with her.  So many unresolved issues...so much hurt...so much sadness...I love her enough to walk away and leave her with my home and all the furniture in it since she lost everything due to an irresponsible mistake that she made that cost her everything, including her home and car.  I don't want to leave her with nothing, so I'm willing to start over as far as a home and furniture.

I don't have the money or resources to truly start over, but I'm going to continue to believe God for a miracle.  I'm actually praying and hoping to hit pick 3 and/or pick 4 a few times to get the funds available so I can leave.  I know many will think that it's silly that I'm playing the lottery in an effort to win money to get an apartment, but I'm believing and I know that I have other lottery buddies that WILL pray and stand in the gaps for me as well.  God knows my heart and he knows that I'm truly sincere, so he will provide.  I know in a few more days, weeks, or months I will be able to write another post rejoicing on WINNING the funds to move to an apartment. 

I'm very artistic so I'm not worried about furnishing my apartment right away.  I will take my bedroom furniture and leave my mother 3 bedroom sets, living room, den, and dining room furniture.  I love creating things so I'm going to start with a fouton, and go from that point on creating an apartment that represents who I am. 

I'm a counselor, freelance writer, model, pageant girl and artist so my place is going to be a healing sanctaury for others and myself.  I want my place to speak love and compassion when one walks through the doors.

I want to return to school to finish my RN Degree to become a psychiatric nurse.  I'm planning on doing this maybe next semester or next year because my primary goal at this time is getting the funds to get an apartment.

I will continue on this journey, and I'm glad that you took the time to come along...

Come back---follow my as I continue my jouney to the other side.

By the way that is the title of a novel that I'm currently working on...My Journey to the Other Side.  It's the first novel that I've written.  I've written and published many articles, but it's exciting to be finally working on a novel.  This is a life dream of mine to write a novel.

Well until we meet again, have a beautiful day!!!


DO ALL the good you can...

YOU are the SPACE that answers can show up...


Please pray for me to get the funds to get an apartment.  Thanks!!!

Entry #1


ToddComment by Todd - May 10, 2004, 10:17 am
Good luck to you. I hope you get everything you dream of.
JAP69Comment by JAP69 - May 10, 2004, 10:12 pm
Good luck
Winner2BeComment by Winner2Be - May 11, 2004, 3:16 pm
Thank you John and Todd!!!
wpbComment by wpb - December 24, 2007, 11:28 am
For some reason, I am just reading this post from 2004. It looks to me that you have met your goals several times over. You had your eyes on the prize and have made it happen. This post has really touched me today and I wish you all the best.
NikkicuteComment by Nikkicute - February 23, 2013, 12:38 am
I'm just reading this post in 2013 and it has touched me as well because I can relate to the mother/daughter part of the post. Yes, W2B is doing well in her life now!

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