joker17's Blog

I knew years ago that Homeland security crap was going to affect me one way or the other.

I went to the Florida DMV to replace my driver's license cause it has seen better days. As of January, 2010, Florida was forced to have new rules regarding getting a license issued, even if you already have one and want to replace it. They want me to show either a passport, birth certificate, or a citizenship certificate, among other things.

But I don't have my citezenship certificate because it was stolen by a roommate about 12 years ago when I was living in N.Y. In order for me to get one, I would have to drive for 2 and a half hours north to Tampa to apply for a certified copy, and it costs $380.00...I also have to spend over 60 dollars in gas to get there and back.

I even provided them the original copy of my DD-214 discharge paper from the Navy, but that's not good enough. So being a veteran does not qualify me to drive a car.

The strange part is that I was allowed to renew my registration to my personal vehicle without showing my Driver's license. hmmmmm.....Mixed up nonsense, I say.

It's a good thing my licence is good till May of 2014. Hopefully by then, I'll be out of FloriDUH for good and be living In sunny, and less hot and humid San Diego.

I showed the lady at the DMV my Class "A" licence meaning I had to go through strict Federal guidlines to pass the test in order to drive 52 foot tractor trailers across the country, DD-214, social security card, hack license in a neighboring county, vehicle registration, automobile insurance papers, and other materials, but it wasn't good enough. They even have a file of my license in their computer with my picture!....WTF?

It's a bunch of BS if you ask me.

A couple of times a week, my laptop's clock changes time and date all by itself, and then I have to change it back to the correct time. The time can be off by just one hour, or by a few hours. The date is usually a day behind, but mostly a day forward.

Any help would be appreciated. I searched on the net for a solution, but there so many supposed solutions.

Thanx.

Nicholas Purcell, a lecturer in ancient
history at Oxford University, said the claims
were the 'usual nonsense'. He added: 'If
floodwaters covered Eurasia 12,000ft deep in
2,800BC, how did the complex societies of
Egypt and Mesopotamia, already many centuries
old, keep right on regardless?'

Video :   http://www.ebaumsworld.com/video/watch/80975598/

http://www.foxnews.com/scitech/2010/04/27/noahs-ark-found-turkey-ararat/

What's interesting is how Noah got, and kept penguins and similar creatures alive? They need cold surroundings to survive. Also, how did he get Kangaroos from Australia?

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There's a man eating his soup in a restaurant in Iceland, when he notices some ashes in his soup.

He calls the waiter to complain about this problem. The waiter tells him that he's terribly sorry, and the reason for the ashes in his soup is due to the fact that the restaurant is located in a "No Fly" zone.

This morning I was dreaming I had a ticket for the p-3 and it was 781, but the winning number was 115. Very vivid. I guess I'll have to play them both today.

Elephant story:

There was once an elephant named Zimba. He was a normal elephant variety, except that he liked mermaids and coffee grounds. He got some residuals from a potato commercial he'd done a few months ago, but it wasn't enough.

A week later, a mexican was cutting his grass when the person he liked next door walked up to him and blew sasafraz powder in his face, and told him about the elephant. This outraged the Mexican and he sneezed.

The Mexican was later arrested on charges of owning too many gazelle noses from Africa. After the Mexican was arrested, he asked why such a long prison sentence, but the cops refused to buy shoes from Tony's warehouse.

The funny thing about this was that the shoes belonged to uncle Charley, and not the Asian girl once thought to be the owner.

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Apple tree

Once in a while my sister emails me stuff I saw many years ago, like funny cartoons or pictures. God bless her soul. I know she means well, but sometimes I think my sister thinks I'm the one behind the times....lol

In response, I usually just say something like thanx, and that was funny. But I thought, maybe I should spice things up a little this time, and just break up the same ol same ol...

Tonight she emailed me a series of pictures which had hidden faces within them, which the viewer had to find. The first picture was a tree. I had to find 10 faces in the tree. So instead of answering the same way as before, I decided to make believe I saw other things in the tree, and no faces.

The following below the dash lines was my response to her tonight...lol

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I didn't see any faces sis.

 In the first picture i saw a gorgonzola processing plant, a bowzan nut from Zimbawe, the knife handle from a WWII esoteric fashion magazine advertisement, and something resembling a tennis racket  manufactured in Madrid, before 1974, during the Tri-ladian period.