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Woman 'hiding lottery win from husband'

Topic closed. 167 replies. Last post 11 years ago by Chewie.

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Bethesda, Maryland
United States
Member #16901
June 6, 2005
446 Posts
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Posted: January 29, 2006, 3:41 pm - IP Logged

She lived with the guy for 15 years, after the drug addiction supposedly stopped; and continued to do so when she had the funds to bail. Kept her kids around him during that whole timeline.  That, in itself, tells a story.  She made a decision to do what she did, and that decision resulted in an obvious mistrust.  Live 15, or more, years with some one you don't trust.  Guess I'll have change universes to understand that concept.

See Ya!HAPPY SUNDAY....."CHEWIE"....

I still don't see her so-called "mis-trust"....He is benefitting Financially from her prize winnings just as their children are..."Jane" has never kept the money to herself. She is sharing her life and money w/him & the Kids.......Furthermore, as far as "trust" and the term "shrew" is  concerned   What do you call a Man, who has Stocks, Bonds, IRA's, Investments of all kinds and Secret Savings Accounts, that he doesn't  voluntarily tell his wife about???....Sometimes she learns about it by accident, when she opens the mail, and finds a Financial Statement, outlining everything, or perhaps he's about to go into the Hospital for Surgery, and he then, out of fear for his life, decides to tell her at the last minute......after years and years of marriage have passed.  What kind of Man does this???? And do you realize how many do it???.....Plenty......For whatever the reason, hundreds of Men do this.......

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    Bethesda, Maryland
    United States
    Member #16901
    June 6, 2005
    446 Posts
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    Posted: January 29, 2006, 4:01 pm - IP Logged

    Majority opinion is, 15 years later you are doomed to repeat your sins.

    Chewie, it sure seems that way for those who don't know the word or the meaning of the word "Forgiveness" and thats an awful/despicable shame!

    Ya gotta love it.  I keep reading how Christianity is the major religon on this country.  Then I read how decietfulness is the appropriate path, and foregiveness is not.  When in doubt, 15 years later, condem the druggie husband and bless the lying wife.  Heaven must be an interesting place.  Full of liars, but no former druggies.  Ahh, sooooooo glad I'm in the minority.

    Addendum:

    Forgiving a Person, doesn't mean that you place every tempation in front of him, to challenge or test his weaknesses.....Obviously, she loves him and forgave him because she could have walked out on him but didn't.  She chose to stay, as I posted earlier, to maintain her family and marriage. To me, there is love and yes, even trust there. There may also be more to her life story, w/him. He has proven to her, that he cannot handle money well, perhaps during the time he "used" he threw away a considerable amount of money, doing so.  I'm just keeping this real....In order to "use" even the "bad stuff"  you need money....& $$$$$$$$ of it, to support the habit.

    He probably threw away enough to scare her, and it taught her a  hard lesson. Which I can appreciate in this day and time...I have watched programs, and read stories of Celebrities, very rich people, who "threw away millions" on Drugs & Alcohol.....and to this day still regret it, and the effects it had on their families & marriages.......I understand your position, but to me, she shows love and trust by trying the best way she can to make a life w/him.....

    Hypothetically.....You know your Son has stolen money from your wallet before.  You take your wallet out of your pocket at night and place it on the top of the dresser. Are you going to leave it where he can walk by and seeing it lying there, to be tempted to steal from it again and again, or put it  somewhere out of sight, to keep him from being tempted????...You still give him money whenever he needs it, but does forgiveness and trust mean that you put temptation in front of him??????

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      Sparta, NJ
      United States
      Member #18331
      July 9, 2005
      1977 Posts
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      Posted: January 29, 2006, 4:06 pm - IP Logged

      She lived with the guy for 15 years, after the drug addiction supposedly stopped; and continued to do so when she had the funds to bail. Kept her kids around him during that whole timeline.  That, in itself, tells a story.  She made a decision to do what she did, and that decision resulted in an obvious mistrust.  Live 15, or more, years with some one you don't trust.  Guess I'll have change universes to understand that concept.

      See Ya!HAPPY SUNDAY....."CHEWIE"....

      I still don't see her so-called "mis-trust"....He is benefitting Financially from her prize winnings just as their children are..."Jane" has never kept the money to herself. She is sharing her life and money w/him & the Kids.......Furthermore, as far as "trust" and the term "shrew" is  concerned   What do you call a Man, who has Stocks, Bonds, IRA's, Investments of all kinds and Secret Savings Accounts, that he doesn't  voluntarily tell his wife about???....Sometimes she learns about it by accident, when she opens the mail, and finds a Financial Statement, outlining everything, or perhaps he's about to go into the Hospital for Surgery, and he then, out of fear for his life, decides to tell her at the last minute......after years and years of marriage have passed.  What kind of Man does this???? And do you realize how many do it???.....Plenty......For whatever the reason, hundreds of Men do this.......

      A bad a doesn't make a Bad B better or worse. In both descriptions, the people losers.  Just because one person did something, doesn't take the heat off of another. Politicians do this all the time.  Hollywood celebrities do it all the time.  They're both losers.

      Cheers

      |||::> *'`*:-.,_,.-:*''*:--->>> Chewie  <<<---.*''*:-.,_,.-:*''* <:::|||

      I only trust myself - and that's a questionable choice

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        Sparta, NJ
        United States
        Member #18331
        July 9, 2005
        1977 Posts
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        Posted: January 29, 2006, 4:14 pm - IP Logged

        Majority opinion is, 15 years later you are doomed to repeat your sins.

        Chewie, it sure seems that way for those who don't know the word or the meaning of the word "Forgiveness" and thats an awful/despicable shame!

        Ya gotta love it.  I keep reading how Christianity is the major religon on this country.  Then I read how decietfulness is the appropriate path, and foregiveness is not.  When in doubt, 15 years later, condem the druggie husband and bless the lying wife.  Heaven must be an interesting place.  Full of liars, but no former druggies.  Ahh, sooooooo glad I'm in the minority.

        Addendum:

        Forgiving a Person, doesn't mean that you place every tempation in front of him, to challenge or test his weaknesses.....Obviously, she loves him and forgave him because she could have walked out on him but didn't.  She chose to stay, as I posted earlier, to maintain her family and marriage. To me, there is love and yes, even trust there. There may also be more to her life story, w/him. He has proven to her, that he cannot handle money well, perhaps during the time he "used" he threw away a considerable amount of money, doing so.  I'm just keeping this real....In order to "use" even the "bad stuff"  you need money....& $$$$$$$$ of it, to support the habit.

        He probably threw away enough to scare her, and it taught her a  hard lesson. Which I can appreciate in this day and time...I have watched programs, and read stories of Celebrities, very rich people, who "threw away millions" on Drugs & Alcohol.....and to this day still regret it, and the effects it had on their families & marriages.......I understand your position, but to me, she shows love and trust by trying the best way she can to make a life w/him.....

        Hypothetically.....You know your Son has stolen money from your wallet before.  You take your wallet out of your pocket at night and place it on the top of the dresser. Are you going to leave it where he can walk by and seeing it lying there, to be tempted to steal from it again and again, or put it  somewhere out of sight, to keep him from being tempted????...You still give him money whenever he needs it, but does forgiveness and trust mean that you put temptation in front of him??????

        Trust is just another word for temptation; it is all about acting appropraitely in any given circumstance.  Remeber when computers first started, their were all the experts who kept breaking into the backdoors.  most went to jail.  Hoever, the experts were immediately hired by the same banks to create the protection systems.  To do that, they had to have access to all the portals and codes.  Amazingly enough, continued theft was a rarity, and even this day, you can thank the forgiving bank leaders for yuor money being safe today.  No one benefits from mistrust and every one gains from trust and forgiveness.  It is how life is supposed to work.  Some one cuts you off on the freeway, do you react in the mood that every one will cut you off? NO! You initiate trust.  On the freeway, that trust can cost more then money, it can cost the life of you and your family.  Trust someone, and they can run you off the road.  Or do you go on your way and say that was the exception to the rule?  Ithink you would choose the latter.

        The woman, in this case, chose to be a deceit and unforgiving.  Which is worse?  A husband who used to be a druggie, or a wife who cheats and lies?  My choice goes to the husband.  Think of me a forgiving banker.

        Cheers

        |||::> *'`*:-.,_,.-:*''*:--->>> Chewie  <<<---.*''*:-.,_,.-:*''* <:::|||

        I only trust myself - and that's a questionable choice

          Jorli D's avatar - nw saucyelf2.jpg
          Michigan
          United States
          Member #2448
          October 4, 2003
          25893 Posts
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          Posted: January 29, 2006, 4:24 pm - IP Logged

          She lived with the guy for 15 years, after the drug addiction supposedly stopped; and continued to do so when she had the funds to bail. Kept her kids around him during that whole timeline.  That, in itself, tells a story.  She made a decision to do what she did, and that decision resulted in an obvious mistrust.  Live 15, or more, years with some one you don't trust.  Guess I'll have change universes to understand that concept.

          See Ya!HAPPY SUNDAY....."CHEWIE"....

          I still don't see her so-called "mis-trust"....He is benefitting Financially from her prize winnings just as their children are..."Jane" has never kept the money to herself. She is sharing her life and money w/him & the Kids.......Furthermore, as far as "trust" and the term "shrew" is  concerned   What do you call a Man, who has Stocks, Bonds, IRA's, Investments of all kinds and Secret Savings Accounts, that he doesn't  voluntarily tell his wife about???....Sometimes she learns about it by accident, when she opens the mail, and finds a Financial Statement, outlining everything, or perhaps he's about to go into the Hospital for Surgery, and he then, out of fear for his life, decides to tell her at the last minute......after years and years of marriage have passed.  What kind of Man does this???? And do you realize how many do it???.....Plenty......For whatever the reason, hundreds of Men do this.......

          Gee, I hardly ever agree with Chewie, but he has valid points. Everyone seems to be forgetting what money is gained in marriage, is marital money.  One spouse cannot hide assets from the other and claim it to be for good cause.  All this woman had to do was file for divorce, agree to set up some of the winnings for the kids, give him his half and what he does with his money is his business, not hers. She is a control freak.  She is dishonest, and why is this a gender battle?  Staying with someone 15 years after they cleaned up their act, then withholding assets is nothng honorable and it still means she lacks trust in him.  Be done with it. Divvy up the money and let him go. 

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            Sparta, NJ
            United States
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            July 9, 2005
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            Posted: January 30, 2006, 6:26 pm - IP Logged

            Thank you Jorli D.  I frequently find your position conflicts with mine.  But I will always support your right to think and say what you feel.  I can ignore it, accept it, debate it, or even argue it.  Sometimes, I'll just turn off the computer and go fishing for a week or two.  Honesty is all I expect - and the gumption to speak honestly; not hide behind some shield.

            And I will never HIDE behind a filter to protect myself from what you say. 

            Cheers

            |||::> *'`*:-.,_,.-:*''*:--->>> Chewie  <<<---.*''*:-.,_,.-:*''* <:::|||

            I only trust myself - and that's a questionable choice

              emilyg's avatar - cat anm.gif

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              Posted: January 30, 2006, 7:05 pm - IP Logged

              Thank you Jorli D.  I frequently find your position conflicts with mine.  But I will always support your right to think and say what you feel.  I can ignore it, accept it, debate it, or even argue it.  Sometimes, I'll just turn off the computer and go fishing for a week or two.  Honesty is all I expect - and the gumption to speak honestly; not hide behind some shield.

              And I will never HIDE behind a filter to protect myself from what you say. 

              nice to see you're Always honest and never lie.  atta chewie!!!

              love to nibble those micey feet.

               

                                           

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                Sparta, NJ
                United States
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                July 9, 2005
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                Posted: January 30, 2006, 9:36 pm - IP Logged

                Moreso then some wifes.

                Cheers

                |||::> *'`*:-.,_,.-:*''*:--->>> Chewie  <<<---.*''*:-.,_,.-:*''* <:::|||

                I only trust myself - and that's a questionable choice

                  Tenaj's avatar - michellea
                  Charlotte NC
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                  June 18, 2005
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                  Posted: January 30, 2006, 9:52 pm - IP Logged

                  Yes NodMy thought is that I think this women was not afraid that her husband will start using again or blow the money.  I think the women was afraid of losing him.  Some people will dis their spouses in a heartbeat if they had the money. 

                   

                  takeemtothebank

                    emilyg's avatar - cat anm.gif

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                    Posted: January 30, 2006, 10:28 pm - IP Logged

                    Moreso then some wifes.

                    and i'm more honest than some husbands.    Cheers

                    love to nibble those micey feet.

                     

                                                 

                      BaristaExpress's avatar - BaristaExpressMX zpsfb0d8b5d.png
                      Magnolia, Delaware
                      United States
                      Member #18795
                      July 20, 2005
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                      Posted: January 30, 2006, 11:27 pm - IP Logged

                      Thank you Jorli D.  I frequently find your position conflicts with mine.  But I will always support your right to think and say what you feel.  I can ignore it, accept it, debate it, or even argue it.  Sometimes, I'll just turn off the computer and go fishing for a week or two.  Honesty is all I expect - and the gumption to speak honestly; not hide behind some shield.

                      And I will never HIDE behind a filter to protect myself from what you say. 

                      But Chewie, others will hide behind the shield! When all it takes is not to answer a posting or to plainly look past someones posting that you don't care to see! That shield feature was given by the administrator of this site to those who may wish to use it! That is their given right to do so if they feel they need it!

                      And God knows I have had my fill of spats here with others that I don't agree with, so what! I still look at what they post in the places I like to read. I don't see the reasoning to shield what they have to say to others for, just because I didn't get along with them and we didn't see eye to eye! To tell you the truth Chewie, I'm probably the one person that shield feature is used on most by those who I didn't get along with! And I don't doubt that one bit! Now that's what I call "A Sure Bet" if there ever was one!

                      Keep dreaming the impossible dream, it just may come true! Thumbs Up

                        mylollipop's avatar - Trek STLOGO6.png

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                        Posted: January 31, 2006, 1:00 am - IP Logged

                        I have always wondered why people always start throwing the "Bible" around so easily when they get their butt into tight spots for? Is it because they have no other "Valid" thoughts for a comeback to someone else's view point that have undeniable merit to them? That must be the reason behind it, but who knows why they do it for. 

                        So, in all fairness, lets give the bible thumper a chance to validate their reason for being here! So, I ask this one question of the one person who is throwing the bible around? What are you doing on a site that vacillates or encourages gambling for? I'd like to see a valid answer to that question. And I don't mean your being here as a so call messenger of God, to get us sinners to change our ways either!

                        But as far as I'm concerned, there is no good reason for a bible thumper to be here on this site! So. I'll call it like I see it! Stop throwing stones while living in a glass house yourself! And you are a Self Righteous Hypocrite to boot! Please stop talking out both sides of your mouth, if you wish to have anyone take what you have to say seriously.

                        And just for the record, I do believe in Jesus Christ, not that I owe you an explanation or anything! But I just didn't want to be the next victim of your bible thumping attack!

                        FYI 

                        Religion and education.  To understand religion is to be educated.  The word lottery is related to the word LOTSLots was an anciet way of making decisions.

                        "And they put forward two, Joseph called Barsabbas, who was surnamed Justus, and Matthias. And they prayed and said, "Lord, Who knowest the hearts of all men, show which one of these two Thou hast chosen to take the place in this ministry and apostleship from which Judas turned aside, to go to his own place." And they cast lots for them, and the lot fell on Matthias; and he was enrolled with the eleven apostles." (Acts 1:12-26 RSV).

                        As with all things, we make choices based on the experiences we have had in life.  Some are good, not so good, then some are absolutely horrible!  But they are our choices for our lives.  What is good for you might not be good for me, vice versa.

                        If this husband knew, he would probably jump up and down and thank his wife for saving him from himself.  Having that money would have been like setting a trap for his downfall.

                        The so-called liberal minded get all choked up when someone freely expresses their opinion(s)..ever notice that???  The liberal become the judgemental...hmmmn.  I speak (write) what I care to say because of my freedom to express my opinions, like the smart lady expressed her right to make what was to her a wise decision to choose how her family was going to reap the benefits of her winnings.  No one appears to be hurtingBanana

                         

                        No one in Christianity is FORCED to change.  Change comes within because you want to change.  It is a CHOICE, just like the smart lady made her choice.  If you espouse to that line of thinking, then good for you.  If you do not, then still good for you.  She chose to keep secret, good for her and I have the choice to agree, like others have the choice to disagree.  That is the beauty of C-H-O-I-C-E.  BananaLive and let liveType

                         

                        "...next victim of Bible-thumping attack?  What kind of attack is being leveled on the lady who chose to keep silent?"  She has been called a lot of negative things... 

                        But then, keep in mind is the glass half-empty  OR  half full?

                          BaristaExpress's avatar - BaristaExpressMX zpsfb0d8b5d.png
                          Magnolia, Delaware
                          United States
                          Member #18795
                          July 20, 2005
                          789 Posts
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                          Posted: January 31, 2006, 11:00 am - IP Logged

                          I have always wondered why people always start throwing the "Bible" around so easily when they get their butt into tight spots for? Is it because they have no other "Valid" thoughts for a comeback to someone else's view point that have undeniable merit to them? That must be the reason behind it, but who knows why they do it for. 

                          So, in all fairness, lets give the bible thumper a chance to validate their reason for being here! So, I ask this one question of the one person who is throwing the bible around? What are you doing on a site that vacillates or encourages gambling for? I'd like to see a valid answer to that question. And I don't mean your being here as a so call messenger of God, to get us sinners to change our ways either!

                          But as far as I'm concerned, there is no good reason for a bible thumper to be here on this site! So. I'll call it like I see it! Stop throwing stones while living in a glass house yourself! And you are a Self Righteous Hypocrite to boot! Please stop talking out both sides of your mouth, if you wish to have anyone take what you have to say seriously.

                          And just for the record, I do believe in Jesus Christ, not that I owe you an explanation or anything! But I just didn't want to be the next victim of your bible thumping attack!

                          FYI 

                          Religion and education.  To understand religion is to be educated.  The word lottery is related to the word LOTSLots was an anciet way of making decisions.

                          "And they put forward two, Joseph called Barsabbas, who was surnamed Justus, and Matthias. And they prayed and said, "Lord, Who knowest the hearts of all men, show which one of these two Thou hast chosen to take the place in this ministry and apostleship from which Judas turned aside, to go to his own place." And they cast lots for them, and the lot fell on Matthias; and he was enrolled with the eleven apostles." (Acts 1:12-26 RSV).

                          As with all things, we make choices based on the experiences we have had in life.  Some are good, not so good, then some are absolutely horrible!  But they are our choices for our lives.  What is good for you might not be good for me, vice versa.

                          If this husband knew, he would probably jump up and down and thank his wife for saving him from himself.  Having that money would have been like setting a trap for his downfall.

                          The so-called liberal minded get all choked up when someone freely expresses their opinion(s)..ever notice that???  The liberal become the judgemental...hmmmn.  I speak (write) what I care to say because of my freedom to express my opinions, like the smart lady expressed her right to make what was to her a wise decision to choose how her family was going to reap the benefits of her winnings.  No one appears to be hurtingBanana

                           

                          No one in Christianity is FORCED to change.  Change comes within because you want to change.  It is a CHOICE, just like the smart lady made her choice.  If you espouse to that line of thinking, then good for you.  If you do not, then still good for you.  She chose to keep secret, good for her and I have the choice to agree, like others have the choice to disagree.  That is the beauty of C-H-O-I-C-E.  BananaLive and let liveType

                           

                          "...next victim of Bible-thumping attack?  What kind of attack is being leveled on the lady who chose to keep silent?"  She has been called a lot of negative things... 

                          But then, keep in mind is the glass half-empty  OR  half full?

                          To understand religion is to be educated, is this what your saying? Now if that isn't a line of BS if I ever heard it! Religion has nothing to do with being educated or not! It just goes to show that you have been to church and studied the bible, like a good Christian!
                          To quote scripture (like you do) and to be on a lottery site like you are, just shows me that you are a "Hypocrite". To use the bible like you have, also shows me you're weak and that you really don't have any convictions of any kind! Well, at least none that you can adhere to for any substantial amount of time!

                          I wonder what your minister/preacher/pastor would say about your activities?
                          I wonder if you're a person leading two different lives?. One that goes to church just to show your community that you are a God fearing human being. And second a person who gambles on the lottery. Mmm, I wonder if the reason for your being on a lottery site isn't to gain knowledge to attain monetary riches that are beyond the riches that God can provide you through his teachings? What's the matter isn't Gods riches that he gives to you through his teachings good enough for you? It must not be! Because you're a member of this site that encourages gambling for monetary riches, "not spiritual riches!"   

                          You see wearing a mask like you are shows you're a deceitful person and a serpent that speaks with a forked tongue!

                          Keep dreaming the impossible dream, it just may come true! Thumbs Up

                            mylollipop's avatar - Trek STLOGO6.png

                            United States
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                            October 21, 2005
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                            Posted: January 31, 2006, 1:02 pm - IP Logged

                            She made the right choice for her.  She was a STRONG woman.  Most likely she had more than enough ridicule from bitter, downtrodden, men (and women) who use every excuse and accusation possible to ridicule her.  You know, like the men who were ready to stone the woman caught in adultery (and in secret; they were very likely to have been one of her suitors Leaving)!  Then Jesus intercepted and said, "Let the first without sin be the first to throw a stone".  The bashers walked away.  No doubt, this story  hit the heart of mankind.  Nathaniel Hawthorne wrote about this situation in his novel, "The Scarlett Letter".  Like Hester Prynee, she CHOSE to keep silent to protect the 'the good minister Dimmesdale'; an obviously weak man.  Hester did waht she thought was best to protect...  The woman who kept her lottery winnings secret did what she thought was best to protect... 

                            Ain't funny

                            who the nay sayers Evil Smileare throughout the centuries!!!!!  These people are weak boo hoo'ers who have so much on their own plates that the need to eat and digest.  A digestive system that is overloaded makes one irritable, canterkous, etc.,  thus the term full of _ _ _ t.  After properly digesting the food on their own plates, maybe, just maybe, they will see that the one they ridiculed was not nearly as bad as they thought she was; rather, in fact, she was much better than theySleepy.

                              BaristaExpress's avatar - BaristaExpressMX zpsfb0d8b5d.png
                              Magnolia, Delaware
                              United States
                              Member #18795
                              July 20, 2005
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                              Posted: January 31, 2006, 3:07 pm - IP Logged

                              Stop defending the woman in the story for her choice! You might think someone of your nature is strong, but in reality you are weak! Just take a long hard look at yourself, you're trying to hide behind scripture! What's the matter with you, didn't God give you a brain so you could think for yourself? Or is it that's all you know how to do is to quote scripture from the bible to get your point across? I hope it's not the ladder for your sake. Because you're failing tremendously!

                              Now, I hope to see the valid reason you think you may have for being on a site that encourages gambling (since you are such a bible thumping Christian)! Of course it hasn't came as of yet and I doubt it ever will! All I have seen so far is this, that and the other thing being brought up. That's because you have no "Valid" reason for being here! First off, No Devout Christian would be caught on such a site! Unless they are a "Hypocrite", which you are and it shows. And I think I have proved that beyond a shadow of doubt in plain words that anyone could understand! 

                              And may God help us all, if you are in any way shape or form better than anyone on this earth!

                              Keep dreaming the impossible dream, it just may come true! Thumbs Up

                                 
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