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Just for fun: Create tabloid headlines re: record jackpot

Topic closed. 35 replies. Last post 5 years ago by HiFi.

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Coin Toss's avatar - shape barbed.jpg
Zeta Reticuli Star System
United States
Member #30470
January 17, 2006
10344 Posts
Offline
Posted: March 30, 2012, 3:50 pm - IP Logged

Just for fun let's make up some tabloid headlines regarding this record jackpot.

Here's a couple:

All combinations played, still no winner.

What?

Someone from Nevada wins jackpot, says they are from Area 51 and vanishes in the middle of press conference!

Scared

Those who run the lotteries love it when players look for consistency in something that's designed not to have any.

Lep

There is one and only one 'proven' system, and that is to book the action. No matter the game, let the players pick their own losers.

    maximumfun's avatar - Lottery-030.jpg
    Lavender Rocket

    United States
    Member #124616
    March 16, 2012
    2642 Posts
    Offline
    Posted: March 30, 2012, 3:55 pm - IP Logged

    Someone from Illinois wins.  Chicago "millionaire" drinks away his ticket:  As 'bond' for his drinking tab, one young buck put up his WINNING-unsigned ticket up as collateral' - now claims cannot remember which bar he was at.

      JADELottery's avatar - MeAtWork 03.PNG
      The Quantum Master
      West Concord, MN
      United States
      Member #21
      December 7, 2001
      3675 Posts
      Offline
      Posted: March 30, 2012, 4:00 pm - IP Logged

      Government out of cash, Jackpot winner paid in Buttons.

      Presented 'AS IS' and for Entertainment Purposes Only.
      Any gain or loss is your responsibility.
      Use at your own risk.

      Order is a Subset of Chaos
      Knowledge is Beyond Belief
      Wisdom is Not Censored
      Douglas Paul Smallish
      Jehocifer

        timmer's avatar - animaniacs03

        United States
        Member #714
        September 18, 2002
        88 Posts
        Offline
        Posted: March 30, 2012, 4:07 pm - IP Logged

        1 day before ticket expires, person wins in Michigan steps forward to claim jackpot. Had to save money for gas!

        Says, 'Thanks BHO!'.

          maximumfun's avatar - Lottery-030.jpg
          Lavender Rocket

          United States
          Member #124616
          March 16, 2012
          2642 Posts
          Offline
          Posted: March 30, 2012, 4:09 pm - IP Logged

          Government out of cash, Jackpot winner paid in Buttons.

          LOLOL

            timmer's avatar - animaniacs03

            United States
            Member #714
            September 18, 2002
            88 Posts
            Offline
            Posted: March 30, 2012, 4:09 pm - IP Logged

            MM Winner forecloses on White House!


            Proclaims, 'Poetic Justice!'.

              JADELottery's avatar - MeAtWork 03.PNG
              The Quantum Master
              West Concord, MN
              United States
              Member #21
              December 7, 2001
              3675 Posts
              Offline
              Posted: March 30, 2012, 4:15 pm - IP Logged

              Guy vomits in terror on a bet after eating the winning lottery ticket.

              Presented 'AS IS' and for Entertainment Purposes Only.
              Any gain or loss is your responsibility.
              Use at your own risk.

              Order is a Subset of Chaos
              Knowledge is Beyond Belief
              Wisdom is Not Censored
              Douglas Paul Smallish
              Jehocifer

                Avatar
                NY
                United States
                Member #23835
                October 16, 2005
                3471 Posts
                Offline
                Posted: March 30, 2012, 4:20 pm - IP Logged

                Shady Lawyer Representing Group From Belize Refuses to Identify Ticket Owner, Waives Prize.

                  lottogenie's avatar - shape barbed.jpg
                  texas
                  United States
                  Member #2324
                  September 15, 2003
                  152 Posts
                  Offline
                  Posted: March 30, 2012, 4:28 pm - IP Logged

                  man quits job loses ticket... ex boss finds ticket becomes rich...

                    JADELottery's avatar - MeAtWork 03.PNG
                    The Quantum Master
                    West Concord, MN
                    United States
                    Member #21
                    December 7, 2001
                    3675 Posts
                    Offline
                    Posted: March 30, 2012, 4:36 pm - IP Logged

                    Con-Man Scams Himself out of Lottery Winnings.

                    Presented 'AS IS' and for Entertainment Purposes Only.
                    Any gain or loss is your responsibility.
                    Use at your own risk.

                    Order is a Subset of Chaos
                    Knowledge is Beyond Belief
                    Wisdom is Not Censored
                    Douglas Paul Smallish
                    Jehocifer

                      Win$500Quick's avatar - Lottery-050.jpg
                      Florida
                      United States
                      Member #77815
                      August 1, 2009
                      3459 Posts
                      Offline
                      Posted: March 30, 2012, 5:24 pm - IP Logged

                      Florida resident made off with money like Bernie or Florida resident hijacks the $640 million jackpot.

                      I drove to Georgia to buy tickets because we don't have Mega Millions.

                      Guess Who's Back?

                        dk1421's avatar - Lottery-024.jpg
                        North Carolina
                        United States
                        Member #64582
                        September 1, 2008
                        347 Posts
                        Offline
                        Posted: March 30, 2012, 5:50 pm - IP Logged

                        Congress wins MM in pool; claims anonymously.

                        "Don't be a schmuck, always take the cash." -Coin Toss

                          haymaker's avatar - Lottery-012.jpg
                          Egg Harbor twp.south Jersey shore
                          United States
                          Member #112968
                          June 29, 2011
                          3850 Posts
                          Offline
                          Posted: March 30, 2012, 5:58 pm - IP Logged

                          oboma's chief of staff wins MM,uses $ to pay off Mitt,Newt & Rick to dropout,

                          Ron paul tells em, "stick where the sun don't shine i'am 76"

                          LOL

                          Extraordinary Popular Delusions & the Madness of Crowds    -- Charles Mackay  LL.D.

                            Astekblue's avatar - Tarlor
                            Kentucky
                            United States
                            Member #35086
                            March 12, 2006
                            10374 Posts
                            Offline
                            Posted: March 30, 2012, 7:10 pm - IP Logged

                            Just for fun let's make up some tabloid headlines regarding this record jackpot.

                            Here's a couple:

                            All combinations played, still no winner.

                            What?

                            Someone from Nevada wins jackpot, says they are from Area 51 and vanishes in the middle of press conference!

                            Scared

                            Green laugh           LOL              ROFL                            Thumbs Up

                              Astekblue's avatar - Tarlor
                              Kentucky
                              United States
                              Member #35086
                              March 12, 2006
                              10374 Posts
                              Offline
                              Posted: March 30, 2012, 7:39 pm - IP Logged

                              Green laugh           LOL              ROFL                            Thumbs Up

                              All    Of   Those   Posts   Above   Were    Really     Funny      Smile