Lottery headlines I'd like to see
October 15, 2004
|Posted: July 12, 2006, 8:28 pm - IP Logged|
Lottery Masses Get Their Wish. Computerized Drawings Banned In All States!
i can definitely see this happening!
A long and winding road
June 10, 2005
|Posted: July 12, 2006, 8:30 pm - IP Logged|
Headlines one might never read:
Braille Lottery tickets on sale! Local Knitting group wins big on first braille ticket! Quilting Bee Group Collects second prize! Reporter alledges they may have forged the tickets though! The community is shocked!
~~Is it true, Is it kind,Is it necessary. ~~~
February 20, 2006
|Posted: July 12, 2006, 8:41 pm - IP Logged|
Headline you might see someday:
The Cash 5 jackpot of $750,000 was claimed today by a man born in this country, worked for forty years, paid his 50% a year in taxes, and then retired. Upon learning that he was a member of LottoryPost.com, his claim was denied. A spokesperson for the Tenneessee Education Lottory said, "We denied his claim because he had an unfair advantage. Belonging to the LotteryPost.com community gave him insight an illegal alien would not have." The winner was never identified but it is suspected that the man police arrested the same day for disorderly conduct outside of Lottery headquarters was the ticket holder.
New York, NY
May 16, 2006
|Posted: July 12, 2006, 9:05 pm - IP Logged|
The Daily News
All views are fit to print-Publisher/Proprietor: Mendacious Mucs
| Lottery Officials Probed |
(Wash, DC--Jul 13, 2009) In an ever widening federal probe, lottery officials in 15 states are facing federal corruption charges stemming from the manipulation of state computers to favor outcomes in which they had a vested interest.
|Hero hacker exposes nationwide lottery corruption |
The scheme was discovered when a hitherto little known hacker, using tools readily available on the internet, bypassed the network security systems in two southern states and discovered that the random scripts which were supposed to operate the computers were not so random, after all.
Zokob, as he likes to be a called is a member of the group, the Mullah-Mafias, an online group of hackers, phreakers and crackers based in New Jersey. Zokob refused to give this reporter his real name or age, but confirmed that he was under 21.
Dermott Dot , a longtime advocate for manual lotteries and the owner of a popular website devoted to lottery games, told this paper that he has long suspected the malfesance of the state officials, and had written a number of letters and complaints to state ombudsmen and to congressional investigators with no luck. he said this only confoirms his longtime fears.
Several players (as they like to call themselves) and members of the premier lottery portal in the world, Lottery Post were interviewed for this story and could not supress their jubilation at the news, in the hope that this will increase pressure on the states to revert to manual lottery drawings.
In related news President Clinton said the public's confidence in the gaming industry must be restored and is pushing Congress to pass national legislation to protect the public. Ms. Clinton said that the public should not lose faith in the games, and that the Federal Government would do all in its power to ensure that the integrity of state lotteries in the US was maintained.
Correspondent T. Ruth Teller , with additional reporting by N. Olies and Sohel P. Megod
July 11, 2003
|Posted: July 12, 2006, 9:24 pm - IP Logged|
New Mexico Roadrunner Jackpot Soars - Lottery Officials Baffled
$168 Million and climbing
In other news, FDA officials take measures to add ink to the controlled substances list. Certain inks have been found to produce severe hallucinagenic reactions.
Outside a convenience store in Bernalillo, NM, a customer was seen to be licking a lottery ticket. "This is real good sh*t", he muttered.
Meanwhile, NM Lottery Commission has announced the debut of a new line of scratchers. "This is the most innovative scratcher yet to appear in the US," asserted one official. "Until now no state has offered a razor-blade and soda straw to assist customers in exposing the psychadelic drawings on the scratcher."
Sounds like something out of Monty Python. I like it.