ochoop17's Blog

On 07/03 /1890 : Idaho became the __ states of the Union .

What do you call an alligator's helper?

There was an elderly man who wanted to make his younger wife pregnant. So, he went to the doctor to have a sperm count done. The doctor told him to take a specimen cup home, fill it, and bring it back the next day. The elderly man came back the next day and the specimen cup was empty and the lid was on it. Doctor: What was the problem? Elderly man: Well, you I tried with my right hand...nothing. So, I tried with my left hand...nothing. My wife tried with her right hand...nothing. Her left hand...nothing. Her mouth...nothing. Then my wife's friend tried. Right hand, left hand, mouth....still nothing. Doctor: Wait a minute. You mean your wife's friend too?! Elderly man: Yeah, and we still couldn't get the lid off of the specimen cup

Who played Louis Winthrope III in the film " Trading Place " ?

What vehicle is spelled the same backwards and forwards?

Q. Why dont blind men skydive?
A. Because it scares the s*** out of the dog.

On June 28, _____: The Treaty Of _____ was signed in ______, ending the First World War.

The word CANDY can be spelled using just 2 letters.
Can you figure out how?

A farmer named Muldoon lived alone in the Irish countryside except for a pet dog he had for a long time.

The dog finally died and Muldoon went to the parish priest, saying "Father, the dog is dead. Could you possibly be saying a Mass for the poor creature?"

Father Patrick told the farmer "No, we can't have services for an animal in the church, but I'll tell you what, there's a new denomination down the road apiece, and no telling what they believe in, but maybe they'll do something for the animal."

Muldoon said "I'll go right now. By the way, do you think $50,000 is enough to donate for the service?"

Father Patrick replied "Why didn't you tell me the dog was Catholic?"

What was the first name of Elvis Presley's mother ?

One day a man met three beggars. To the first he gave a dime, to the second a dime, and to the third a nickel. What time was it?

God and the man

 

So the man says "God, you've been around for a very long time,
so, for you, how long is a thousand years?"

God replies "For me, a thousand years is only five minutes."

The man then says "That's interesting God. And, for you,
how much is a million dollars?"

God replies "For me, a million dollars is only five cents."

The man says "Really? Well then God, could you lend me
five cents please?"

God looks at the man, smiles, and says "Of course my son.
Just wait five minutes!"

How many islands is Venice, Italy, built on ?

On June_,19_. The first-ever Father's Day was celebrated in_________.

Never ahead, ever behind, yet flying swiftly past; for a child, I last forever; for an adult, I`m gone too fast. What am I?