ochoop17's Blog

There is one that has a head without an eye And theres one that has an eye without a head. You may find the answer if you try; And when all is said Half the answer hangs upon a thread.

Yvette Marie Stevens is better known by what name ?

HATE LETTER!! Read Carefully

I live above a star, and have eleven neighbors. PRS (& sometimes Q)

are my initials. Who am I?

Who had a hit in the 1980swith "Take Me Home Tonight" ?

Once ther was an insurance saleman from the city going out to the farm community to sell insurance to the farmers. He was way out in the country when he had engine trouble. Not knowing anything about cars he gets out and looks under the hood anyway.
All of a sudden he hears a voice that says " Its the carborator "

The insurance man jumps , and looks around, seeing no one . He then looks under the hood again hoping it is something visible that he could fix himself, when he hears the voice again " Its the carborator "

The man jumps again and turns around only seeing a large Brahma bull behind him. Scared out of his wits he takes off running to the nearest farm house he can see.

He knocks on the door, the farmer answers, the man immediately goes into his speal about the bull.

The farmer scratches his head and says " Does he have one straight ear and one floppy ear? "

The man nods "Yes, Yes ".

The farmer laughs and says " Don't worry about him he doesn't know as much about cars as he thinks he does"

From which 7 letter word, if you take out 4 letters, you will have one left?

Which president signed the Hawaii statehood bill ?

A man goes to a bar with his dog. He goes up to the bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says "You can't bring that dog in here!" The guy, without missing a beat, says "This is my seeing-eye dog." "Oh man, " the bartender says, "I'm sorry, here, the first one's on me." The man takes his drink and goes to a table near the door.

Another guy walks in the bar with a Chihuahua. The first guys sees him, stops him and says "You can't bring that dog in here unless you tell him it's a seeing-eye dog." The second man graciously thanks the first man and continues to the bar. He asks for a drink. The bartender says "Hey, you can't bring that dog in here!"

The second man replies "This is my seeing-eye dog." The bartender says, "No, I don't think so. They do not have Chiwauas as seeing-eye dogs." The man pauses for a half-second and replies "What?!?! They gave me a Chihuahua?!?"

They have not flesh, nor feathers, nor scales, nor bone. Yet they have fingers and thumbs of their own. What are they?

Who was the first U. S. president to file an income tax report ?

Upon arriving home in eager anticipation of a leisurely evening, the
husband was met at the door by his sobbing wife. Tearfully she
explained, "It's the druggist - he insulted me terribly this morning
on the phone."

Immediately the husband drove downtown to accost the druggist and
demand an apology. Before he could say more than a word or two, the
druggist told him, "Now, just a minute - listen to my side of it.
This morning the alarm failed to go off, so I was late getting up.
I went without breakfast and hurried out to the car, but I'll be
<snip>ed if I didn't lock the house with both house and car keys
inside. I had to break a window to get my keys. Driving a little
too fast, I got a speeding ticket. Then, about three blocks from
the store I had a flat tire.

When I finally got to the store there was a bunch of people waiting
for me to open up. I got the store opened and started waiting on
these people, and all the time the darn phone was ringing its head
off. Then I had to break a roll of nickels against the cash
register drawer to make change, and they spilled all over the floor.
I got down on my hands and knees to pick up the nickels - the phone
is still ringing - when I came up I cracked my head on the open cash
drawer, which made me stagger back against a showcase with a bunch
of perfume bottles on it, and half of them hit the floor and broke.
The phone is still ringing with no let up, and I finally got back to
answer it. It was your wife - she wanted to know how to use a
rectal thermometer. Well, Mister, I TOLD HER!"

Lives without a body, hears
without ears, speaks without a
mouth, to which the air alone gives
birth.

Who had a disco with the song " Got To Be Real " ?

A man spent a weekend gambling in Las Vegas casinos, and he won $100,000. He didn't want anyone to know about it, so whan he came back home, he immediately went out to the backyard of his house, dug a hole and planted the money in it. The next morning he walked outside and found only an empty hole. He noticed footsteps leading from the hole to the house next door, which was owned by a deaf-mute. On the same street lived a professor who understood sign language and was a friend of the deaf man. Grabbing his pistol, the enraged man went to awaken the professor and dragged him to the deaf man's house. He screamed at the professor:

- "You tell this guy that if he doesn't give me back my money I'll kill him!"

The professor conveyed the message to his friend, and his friend replied in sign language:
- "I hid it in my backyard, underneath the cherry tree."

The professor turned to the man with the gun and said:
- "He's not going to tell you. He said he'd rather die first."