ochoop17's Blog

Two deaf men were talking on their coffee break about being out late the night before.

The first man signed to his friend, "My wife was asleep when I got home, so I was able to sneak into bed, and not get into trouble."

The second deaf man signed back, "Boy you're lucky. My wife was wide awake, waiting for me in bed, and she started swearing at me and giving me hell for being out so late."

The first deaf man asked, "So, what did you do?"

The second man replied, "I turned out the light."

Two deaf men were talking on their coffee break about being out late the night before.

The first man signed to his friend, "My wife was asleep when I got home, so I was able to sneak into bed, and not get into trouble."

The second deaf man signed back, "Boy you're lucky. My wife was wide awake, waiting for me in bed, and she started swearing at me and giving me hell for being out so late."

The first deaf man asked, "So, what did you do?"

The second man replied, "I turned out the light."

A boy Was Born In 1955 he just had his 18th birth day today how did that happen?

At a nursing home in Florida, a group of senior citizens were sitting
around talking about their aches and pains. "My arms are so weak
I can hardly lift this cup of coffee," said one.

"I know what you mean. My cataracts are so bad I can't even see
my coffee," replied another.

"I can't turn my head because of the arthritis in my neck," said a third,
to which several nodded weakly in agreement.

"My blood pressure pills make me dizzy," another contributed.

"I guess that's the price we pay for getting old," winced an old man as he
slowly shook his head. Then there was a short moment of silence.

"Well, it's not that bad," said one woman cheerfully. "Thank God we can
all still drive."

A man worked at a high security institution. The man tried to log into his computer and the computer denied the password. He then remembered that the passwords to the computers were reset every month for security reasons. He called his boss for his new password.

The man said, "Boss, my old password is out of date."

The boss said, "Yes, it is. The new password is different, but if you listen closely you will be able to figure out the new one. Your new password has the same amount of letters as the old one, and four of the letters are the same."

The man then logged into his computer with no trouble. What was the new password? What was his old?

If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments.

What has a head, but can't think. And has no limbs but can drive

If money doesn't grow on trees then why do banks have branches?

Take me for a spin and I'll make you cool,
but use me when it's cool and you're a fool.

What am I?

A beautiful Swedish blonde walks into a Vegas casino and goes straight to the roulette table. She smiles to the two dealers and bets $20,000 on one spin. 

Which word in the dictionary is spelled incorrectly?

A guy walked into a bar with jumper cables. The bartender says, you can have a drink, but ya better not start anything.

Swap one letter from each of the words "Right" and "Blight" to make two related words.