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ochoop17's Blog

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Yesterday, 12:07 pmWhat Belong..

What belongs to yourself, but is used more by your friends than by yourself?

Entry #2,985
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October 7, 2015, 10:54 amThe First Kiss

At the end of their first date, a young man takes his favorite girl home. Emboldened by the night, he decides to try for that important first kiss.
       With an air of confidence, he leans with his hand against the wall and, smiling, he says to her, "Darling, how 'bout a goodnight kiss?"
       Horrified, she replies, "Are you mad? My parents will see us!"
       "Oh come on! Who's gonna see us at this hour?"
       "No, please. Can you imagine if we get caught?"
       "Oh come on, there's nobody around, they're all sleeping!"
       "No way. It's just too risky!"
       "Oh please, please, I like you so much!!"
       "No, no, and no. I like you too, but I just can't!"
       "Oh yes you can. Please?"
       "NO, no. I just can't."
       Out of the blue, the porch light goes on, and the girl's sister shows up in her pajamas, hair disheveled. In a sleepy voice the sister says: "Dad says to go ahead and give him a kiss. Or I can do it. Or if need be, he'll come down himself and do it. But for crying out loud tell him to take his hand off the intercom button!"

Entry #2,984
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October 6, 2015, 9:11 amWhat Do You..

What do you get if you cross an alley cat with a canary?

Entry #2,983
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October 5, 2015, 11:33 amPlane Crash

A small two-seater Cessna 152 plane crashed into a cemetery early this afternoon in central Poland. Polish search and rescue workers have recovered 300 bodies so far and expect that number to climb as digging continues into the evening.

Entry #2,982
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October 3, 2015, 11:55 amYou Will Know..

You will know that I am coming
From the jingle of my bell,
But exactly who I am is not an easy thing to tell.

Children, they adore me
for they find me jolly,
but I do not see them when the halls are decked with holly.

My job often leaves me frozen,
I am a man that all should know,
But I do not do business in times of sleet or ice or snow.

I travel much on business,
But no reindeer haul me around,
I do all my traveling firmly on the ground.

I love the time of Christmas,
But that's not my vocational season,
And I assure that is because of a sound economic reason

Entry #2,981
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October 1, 2015, 10:11 amPublic School

As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in public schools.

Entry #2,980
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September 30, 2015, 11:29 amA Riddle

The eight of us go forth not back to protect our king from a foes attack.

Entry #2,979
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September 29, 2015, 11:32 amWhy Is..

Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?
Entry #2,978
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September 28, 2015, 12:35 pmWhat Is..

 I look at you, you look at me, I raise my right, you raise your left. What is this object?

Entry #2,977
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September 25, 2015, 10:34 amA Woman..

A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal. Her husband responds, ''But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal.''

Entry #2,976
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September 23, 2015, 9:36 amWhat Is It ?

The more there is, the less you see.

Entry #2,975
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September 22, 2015, 10:28 amA Young Man

A young man and his date were parked on a back road some distance from town. After sex the girl said, "I really should have mentioned this earlier, but I am actually a hooker, and I charge $100 for what we just did."
The man retorted, "And I should have mentioned this before, but I am actually a taxi driver, and the fare back to town is $200."

Entry #2,974
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September 21, 2015, 12:00 pmWhat Has..

What has teeth but can't eat?

Entry #2,973
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September 20, 2015, 11:04 amPlaying Golf

Three men were playing golf. The course was a wicked dogleg with a large water hazard.

The first man stepped up to the tee and hit a sharp slice into the water hazard. He walked up to the water; it parted and he lofted his ball within one foot of the hole.

The next man stepped up and hit the ball. Sure enough, he sliced it so that it landed on top of the water. He walked across the surface of the water and and hit the ball within six inches of the hole.The third man stepped up, hit the ball, and sliced it. The ball was just about to land in the water when a trout jumped out of the water and grabbed it in his mouth. An eagle swooped down, scooped up the fish, and flew off. As the eagle banked over the green, lightning struck it, it dropped the fish, the fish dropped the ball, and it landed in the hole for a hole in one.

Moses turned to Jesus and said, "I really hate playing golf with your Dad."

Entry #2,972
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September 17, 2015, 11:12 amWhat Word ?

What Word this Text Rebus say ? XLR8

Entry #2,971
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