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Michael E. Port's Blog

  • Michael E. Port's Blog has 120 entries (0 private) and has been viewed 151,152 times.
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January 19, 2007, 6:29 pmInternet is Back

 
I finally got my Internet back.  We got a new modem today and I was able to install it.  And after spending about an hour on the phone with AT&T, I was able to access the Internet.
 
I can finally do newsletters and post on my blog.  I would be happier if I wasn't so tired.
 
Michael 

Last Edited: December 11, 2008, 9:05 pm

Entry #120
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January 4, 2007, 3:25 pmFull Moon Names for 2007

Full Moon Names for 2007

 
 

Joe Rao

Full Moon names date back to Native Americans, of what is now the northern and eastern United States. Those tribes of a few hundred years ago kept track of the seasons by giving distinctive names to each recurring full Moon. Their names were applied to the entire month in which each occurred.

There were some variations in the Moon names, but in general the same ones were current throughout the Algonquin tribes from New England on west to Lake Superior. European settlers followed their own customs and created some of their own names. Since the lunar ("synodic") month is roughly 29.5 days in length on average, the dates of the full Moon shift from year to year.

Here is a listing of all the full Moon names, as well as the dates and times for 2007. Unless otherwise noted, all times are for the Eastern Time Zone.

Jan. 3, 8:57 a.m. EST - The Full Wolf Moon. Amid the zero cold and deep snows of midwinter, the wolf packs howled hungrily outside Indian villages. It was also known as the Old Moon or the "Moon After Yule." In some tribes this was the Full Snow Moon; most applied that name to the next Moon.

Feb. 2, 12:45 a.m. EST - The Full Snow Moon. Usually the heaviest snows fall in this month. Hunting becomes very difficult, and hence to some tribes this was the Full Hunger Moon.

March 3, 6:17 p.m. EST - The Full Worm Moon. In this month the ground softens and the earthworm casts reappear, inviting the return of the robins. The more northern tribes knew this as the Full Crow Moon, when the cawing of crows signals the end of winter, or the Full Crust Moon because the snow cover becomes crusted from thawing by day and freezing at night. The Full Sap Moon, marking the time of tapping maple trees, is another variation. A total lunar eclipse will take place on this night; the Moon will appear to rise will totally immersed (or nearly so) in the Earth's shadow over the eastern United States. The rising Moon will be emerging from the shadow over the central United States, while over the Western U.S. the eclipse will be all but over by the time the Moon rises.

April 2, 1:15 p.m. EDT - The Full Pink Moon. The grass pink or wild ground phlox is one of the earliest widespread flowers of the spring. Other names were the Full Sprouting Grass Moon, the Egg Moon, and -- among coastal tribes -- the Full Fish Moon, when the shad came upstream to spawn. This is also the Paschal Full Moon; the first full Moon of the spring season. The first Sunday following the Paschal Moon is Easter Sunday, which indeed will be observed six days later on Sunday, April 8.

May 2, 6:09 a.m. EDT - The Full Flower Moon. Flowers are abundant everywhere. It was also known as the Full Corn Planting Moon or the Milk Moon.

May 31, 9:04 p.m. EDT - The Blue Moon. The second full Moon occurring within a calendar month is usually bestowed this title.

Although the name suggests that to have two Full Moons in a single month is a rather rare occurrence (happening "just once in a . . . "), it actually occurs once about every three years on average.

June 30, 9:49 a.m. EDT - The Full Strawberry Moon. Known to every Algonquin tribe. Europeans called it the Rose Moon.

July 29, 8:48 p.m. EDT - The Full Buck Moon, when the new antlers of buck deer push out from their foreheads in coatings of velvety fur. It was also often called the Full Thunder Moon, thunderstorms being now most frequent. Sometimes also called the Full Hay Moon.

Aug. 28, 6:35 a.m. EDT - The Full Sturgeon Moon, when this large fish of the Great Lakes and other major bodies of water like Lake Champlain is most readily caught. A few tribes knew it as the Full Red Moon because the moon rises looking reddish through sultry haze, or the Green Corn Moon or Grain Moon. A total lunar eclipse will coincide with moonset for the eastern United States. The Central and Mountain Time Zones will see the Moon's emergence coincide with moonset, while the western United States will see the entire eclipse.

Sept. 26, 3:45 p.m. EDT - The Full Harvest Moon. Always the full Moon occurring nearest to the Autumnal Equinox. Corn, pumpkins, squash, beans, and wild rice-- the chief Indian staples--are now ready for gathering.

Oct. 26, 12:52 a.m. EDT - The Full Hunter's Moon. With the leaves falling and the deer fattened, it is time to hunt. Since the fields have been reaped, hunters can ride over the stubble, and can more easily see the fox, also other animals that have come out to glean and can be caught for a thanksgiving banquet after the harvest. The Moon will also be at perigee later this day, at 7:00 a.m., at a distance of 221,676 miles from Earth. Very high tides can be expected from the coincidence of perigee with full Moon.

Nov. 24, 9:30 a.m. EST - The Full Beaver Moon. Time to set beaver traps before the swamps freeze to ensure a supply of warm winter furs. Another interpretation suggests that the name Beaver Full Moon comes from the fact that the beavers are now active in their preparation for winter. Also called the Frosty Moon.

Dec. 23, 2:51 a.m. EST - The Full Cold Moon; among some tribes, the Full Long Nights Moon. In this month the winter cold fastens its grip, and the nights are at their longest and darkest. Also sometimes called the "Moon before Yule" (Yule is Christmas, and this time the Moon is only just before it). The term Long Night Moon is a doubly appropriate name because the midwinter night is indeed long and the Moon is above the horizon a long time. The midwinter full Moon takes a high trajectory across the sky because it is opposite to the low Sun.

Joe Rao serves as an instructor and guest lecturer at New York's Hayden Planetarium. He writes about astronomy for The New York Times and other publications, and he is also an on-camera meteorologist for News 12 Westchester, New York.

Full Moon Fever The Fallacy of the Full Moon Skywatcher's Guide to the Moon Top 10 Luna-Terms

Original Story: Full Moon Names for 2007

 
Entry #119
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January 4, 2007, 3:23 pmAstrological Timetable

Astrological Timetable

 

The Best Days for Certain Activities

by Celeste Longacre

 

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                   
   

Activity

   
   

Jan.
   2007

   
   

Feb.
   2007

   
   

Best days: Quit smoking

   
   

6, 11

   
   

7, 17

   
   

Best days: Begin diet to lose weight

   
   

6, 11

   
   

7, 17

   
   

Best days: Begin diet to gain weight

   
   

20, 24

   
   

21

   
   

Best days: Cut hair to discourage growth

   
   

5, 6, 10, 11

   
   

6, 7

   
   

Best days: Cut hair to encourage growth

   
   

26, 27

   
   

22, 23

   
   

Best days: Go to the dentist

   
   

7, 8

   
   

4, 5

   
   

Best days: Start projects

   
   

20

   
   

18

   
   

Best days: End projects

   
   

18

   
   

16

   
   

Best days: Entertain

   
   

5, 6

   
   

1, 2, 28

   
   

Best days: Go camping

   
   

15, 16

   
   

11, 12

   
   

Best days: Plant aboveground vegetables

   
   

21, 22, 30, 31

   
   

18, 19, 26, 27

   
   

Best days: Plant belowground vegetables

   
   

3, 4, 12, 13

   
   

9, 10

   
   

Best days: Destroy pests and weeds

   
   

23, 24

   
   

20, 21

   
   

Best days: Graft or pollinate

   
   

3, 4, 30, 31

   
   

26, 27

   
   

Best days: Prune to encourage growth

   
   

23, 24

   
   

20, 21

   
   

Best days: Prune to discourage growth

   
   

15, 16

   
   

11, 12

   
   

Best days: Harvest aboveground vegetables

   
   

26, 27

   
   

22, 23

   
   

Best days: Harvest belowground vegetables

   
   

7, 8

   
   

4, 5, 13, 14

   
   

Best days: Cut hay

   
   

23, 24

   
   

20, 21

   
   

Best days: Begin logging

   
   

17, 18

   
   

13, 14

   
   

Best days: Set posts or pour concrete

   
   

17, 18

   
   

13, 14

   
   

Best days: Breed animals

   
   

12, 13

   
   

9, 10

   
   

Best days: Weaning animals and children

   
   

6, 11

   
   

7, 17

   
   

Best days: Potty training children

   
   

6, 11

   
   

7, 17

   
   

Best days: Castrate animals

   
   

19, 20

   
   

15, 16

   
   

Best days: Slaughter animals

   
   

12, 13

   
   

9, 10

   
 
Entry #118
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December 29, 2006, 9:46 pmLotto Texas Lottery Pool - Game Two 1st Update

Lotto Texas

Lotto Texas Lottery Pool - Game Two

Again, we have 7 members, but I lost Johnnie Dodson, but gained Juanita Brown from Ohio.

Ms. Brown plays with me in both Mega Millions and Die Hard games.  She is one of the few members who play in all my games.  I think there are only four members who play in all my games, and that number doesn’t include me.

While this group has seven members, we have more shares.  I purchased two additional shares so we could have $90, and you will see why in a minute.

I will be attaching your tickets and the membership list to this newsletter.

I am going to skip the rules, because all of you are experience players and know how I play.  You know that I purchase Cash Option tickets, and we are playing Lotto Texas in this game.

I would like for you to read this article from Parade Magazine.  Some of you who play in the Die Hard Multi-Lottery Pool have already seen it, but after you read you will understand what I did.

From the Parade magazine, in the ask Marilyn article, (www.parade.com) I ran across this:

 

You said it doesn’t matter if I keep the same lottery numbers every time or change them—the chances of winning are the same. Does this mean that if I choose the numbers 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 and 6, my chances are just as good as anyone else’s?
—Dennis Locke,
Greenville, Tex.

Yes, they are. This may help put the odds against winning in better perspective.

 

This got me to thinking.  I found that in almost all Lottery Drawing numbers are clump together.  It’s not hard to find winning numbers to be something like this:

05, 06. 08, 09, 10, 51, Now if you had purchase all even numbers, you would have one something.  If you purchase the numbers in order, you still would have won something.

Here are the numbers from the Lotto Texas Drawing on

                     
   

11/29/2006

   
   

25

   
   

44

   
   

46

   
   

47

   
   

48

   
   

54

   

 

I tested this theory a few days ago.  I purchased a $60 Cash Five.  I wanted to see how much money I could win from it. 

The very first day, I won $11.00! And now almost every day I’m winning $2.00 per day.  My ticket doesn’t expire until January 5th, 2007 and I’m thinking that I will either make a profit from this ticket, or I may just break even.  Hey, I could win Cash Five maybe.

I needed $90.00 to get every number in Lotto Texas, hence the reason I opted to buy myself 3 shares ($30.00) in this game.  We have every number!

This game will be an e-mail only game.  I have no members that require paper copies.  So my updates will be easier, faster, and cheaper.

This group only has 7 members, but only 3 of them live in the Dallas Metroplex.  Tambra lives in San Antonio, so she is not really an out of state member, but she is out of town.

My Anonymous player lives in Atlanta, Georgia, and you all already know that Juanita Brown lives in Ohio.

Now ladies and gentlemen, I don’t think we will win on our tickets, but I think we are going to win some money.  It’s my hope that we won on every drawing, and I can buy more tickets for this group.  Right now, I haven’t decided if I will select numbers or do quick picks, but I think we are going to win something.

Our first drawing in on Saturday December 30th, 2006 and the Jack Pot is worth $17 Million, the Cash Option is worth $10,200,000.00! 

Here is the breakdown if we should win:

                  
   

Shares Purchased

   
   

Amount that could be won

   
   

3

   
   

$3,400,000.00

   
   

1

   
   

$1,133,333.33

   

 

 

 

 

 

Good luck and happy playing.

 
Lottery Ticket ONe

 Lottery Ticket Two

 

Entry #117
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December 29, 2006, 9:36 pmMega Million Lottery Pool - Game 29 10th Update

Mega Million Lottery Pool - Game 29
 

Quote of the Day

Don't work for my happiness, my brothers--show me yours--show me that it is possible--show me your achievement--and the knowledge will give me courage for mine.
--Ayn Rand

 

We $21.00 in Tuesday’s drawing, and I purchased us more tickets for this game.  However, I did not extend this game.  All you money was spend on the last drawing for 2006, Friday December 29th, 2006

The numbers for last night’s drawing were:

7-12-25-44-53 Bonus: 3

 

Mega Millions

Results for your numbers: 4 - 7 - 12 - 32 - 53 (1)

                                 
   

Matched

   
   

Prize

   
   

Date

   
   

Numbers Drawn

   
   

(Mega Ball)

   
   

3 of 5

   
   

$7

   
   

12/26/2006

   
   

7 - 12 - 25 - 44 - 53

   
   

(3)

   
   

Megaplier 3X

   

So $7.00 won with the Megaplier being 3 we got $21.00.  You tickets are attached to this e-mail or behind the newsletter if you are getting a paper copy.

This is NOW a mixed game.  I was able to purchase 10 lines for $20.00, but the last $1.00 was spent for a straight line (Not megaplied).

The game must win something for me to extend this game into the New Year.

You have 16 lines in tomorrow night’s drawing.  15 of those are megaplied.

The Mega Millions jackpot for the drawing on Friday, December 29th, 2006 is: $72 million. I get my Cash Option from www.ohiolottery.com.  They tend to have the most accurate.  The Cash Option for Tuesday’s drawing is:

 $42,755,328.00

This game has 51 members, but I sold 64 shares ($640.00 in tickets) so I will divide Cash Option by 64 to get our payout.  Please remember this figure is before any attorney fees, taxes or tithes.

                                    
   

Numbers of Shares

   

Purchased

   
   

Your Share of winnings

   
   

.5

   
   

$   334,026.00

   
   

1

   
   

$   668,052.00

   
   

1.5

   
   

$   1,032,078.00

   
   

2

   
   

$ 1,376,104.00

   
   

4.5

   
   

$   3,096,234.00

   

 

Remember its win or lose in tomorrow’s drawing.

I won’t be able to send to you a membership list tonight.  I will on the next update (Saturday).  I had a lot of people who paid on the last day.  Remember we get paid at Citi on the 15th, and the last day of the month.  Which means we get paid tomorrow, but there are still people who wait until the last minute to pay, hence they hung on to the money from their check on the 15th just to pay me as late as possible.

Which of course means many people forgot.  I have Jury Duty tomorrow, so will not be at work.  And I have told every one this over and over.  So if you didn’t pay me today, then NO you are NOT in Game 30.

The good news is we have 16 lines and we may win tomorrow night!

. A. A. D. D. - Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder.

This is how it manifests:
I decide to water my garden.

As I turn on the hose in the driveway, I look over at my GMC and decide it needs washing.

As I start toward the garage, I notice that there is mail on the porch table that I brought up from the mailbox earlier.

I decide to go through the mail before I wash the GMC.

I lay the coach keys down on the table, put the junk mail in the garbage can under the table, and notice that the can is full.

So, I decide to put the bills back on the table and take out the garbage first.

But then I think, since I'm going to be near the mailbox when I take out the garbage anyway, I may as well pay the bills first.

I take my checkbook off the table, and see that there is only one check left.

My extra checks are in my desk in the study, so I go inside the house to my desk where I find the can of Coke that I had been drinking.

I'm going to look for my checks, but first I need to push the Coke aside so that I don't accidentally knock it over. I see that the Coke is getting warm, and I decide I should put it in the refrigerator to keep it cold.

As I head toward the kitchen with the Coke a vase of flowers on the counter catches my eye--they need to be watered.

I set the Coke down on the counter, and I discover my reading glasses that I've been searching for all morning.

I decide I better put them back on my desk, but first I'm going to water the flowers.

I set the glasses back down on the counter, fill a container with water and suddenly I spot the TV remote. Someone left it on the kitchen table.

I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV, I will be looking for the remote, but I won't remember that it's on the kitchen table, so I
decide to put it back in the den where it belongs, but first I'll water the flowers. I pour some water in the flowers, but quite a bit of it spills on the floor.

So, I set the remote back down on the table, get some towels and wipe up the spill.

Then I head down the hall trying to remember what I was planning to do.

At the end of the day:

* the GMC isn't washed
* the bills aren't paid
* there is a warm can of Coke sitting on the counter
* the flowers don't have enough water
* there is still only one check in my check book
* I can't find the remote
* I can't find my glasses
* I don't remember what I did with the car keys.

Then when I try to figure out why nothing got done today, I'm really baffled because I know I was busy all day long, and I'm really tired.
I realize this is a serious problem, and I'll try to get some help for it, but first I'll check my e-mail.

Do me a favor, will you?

Forward this message to everyone you know, because I don't remember to whom it has been sent.
Don't laugh -- if this isn't you yet, your day is coming!

GROWING OLDER IS MANDATORY.
GROWING UP IS OPTIONAL.
LAUGHING AT YOURSELF IS THERAPEUTIC!

 
Old Woman Dancing
Entry #116
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December 27, 2006, 1:04 amMega Millons Lottery Pool - Game 28

 

Today’s Thought

A dream is an answer to a question we haven't yet learned how to ask.

--Fox Mulder

 

 

 

I just check out tickets and we won nothing.  But, we did play for a long time.  This game started on Friday, October 20th, 2006 and play until Tuesday December 26th, 2006.  (I thought this game would never end.)

Here are tonight’s numbers:

      
   

7,12,25,44,53

   
   

Mega Ball = 3

   

 

Here are your numbers:

                                                      
   

Numbers

   
   

Mega Ball

   
   

Dates Valid

   
   

27 34 35 41 48

   
   

42

   
   

11/24/2006 thru 12/26/2006

   
   

05 06 13 40 52

   
   

17

   
   

11/24/2006 thru 12/26/2006

   
   

07 10 15 22 41

   
   

05

   
   

11/24/2006 thru 12/26/2006

   
   

06 22 34 39 56

   
   

04

   
   

12/26/2006  New Ticket

   
   

06 23 35 36 39

   
   

40

   
   

12/26/2006  New Ticket

   

 

Game 29 has already started and only has one more drawing left (Friday, December 29th, 2006).  But you still have a little bit of time to pay to be in Game 30, with starts on Tuesday January 2nd, 2007.

 

 

The Three Bears on Mother’s Day

Baby Bear goes downstairs and sits in his small chair at the table; he looks into his small bowl. It is empty. "Who's been eating my porridge? He squeaks.

Papa Bear arrives at the big table and sits in his big chair. He looks into his big bowl, and it is also empty. "Who's been eating my porridge?" he roars. Momma Bear puts her head through the serving hatch from the kitchen and yells,

"For Pete's sake, how many mornings do I have to go through this with you guys??

It was Momma Bear who got up first, it was Momma Bear who woke everyone in the house, it was Momma Bear who made the coffee, it was Momma Bear who unloaded the dishwasher from last night, and put everything away, it was Momma Bear who went out in the cold early morning air to fetch the newspaper, it was Momma Bear who set the breakfast table, it was Momma Bear who put the cat out, cleaned the litter box, and filled the cat's water and food dish, and, now that you've decided to drag yourselves downstairs, and grace Momma Bear's kitchen with your grumpy presence, listen good, cause I'm only going to say this one more time -

 

   

I HAVEN'T MADE THE PORRIDGE YET"
 

 

 

 

December 24, 2006, 3:49 pmMy Two Hundred and Ten Dollars Spending Spree

Last month, November 8th, 2006 to be exact, I thought I would test a system on the lottery to see if I could win, or make money, or at the very least brake even.

I checked www.txlottery.com  And I printed out all the numbers see the frequency of the times they were drawn.  I thought was that some people are always going after "Hot" numbers, because chances are good they will come up again.  I have always done well with only buying "Cold" numbers.  You know Numbers that rarely come up.  My thought is that "Cold" numbers will eventually become "Hot" numbers, and I want to have those numbers when they do come up.

So I selected two lines of "Cold" numbers, two lines of "Hot" numbers and one line of Quick Picks.

Here are my tickets and the results.  I purchased 10 draw tickets, so my Cash Five ran for two weeks (12 draws) and Texas Two-Step, Lotto Texas, and Mega Millions all ran for one month.

 

Cash Five

Texas Cash Five

 

 

Cash Five Winnings;

 

Line A

                        
   

of 5

   
   

$2

   
   

11/24/2006

   
   

12 - 15 - 19 - 32 - 37

   
   

2 of 5

   
   

$2

   
   

11/22/2006

   
   

3 - 8 - 13 - 26 - 27

   

 

Line B

            
   

2 of 5

   
   

$2

   
   

11/08/2006

   
   

7 - 12 - 19 - 32 - 33

   

 

Line C

                                    
   

3 of 5

   
   

$7

   
   

11/18/2006

   
   

4 - 6 - 7 - 14 - 19

   
   

2 of 5

   
   

$2

   
   

11/14/2006

   
   

1 - 3 - 8 - 14 - 23

   
   

2 of 5

   
   

$2

   
   

11/10/2006

   
   

3 - 6 - 9 - 10 - 35

   

 

Line D

                        
   

3 of 5

   
   

$10

   
   

11/17/2006

   
   

2 - 10 - 14 - 21 - 22

   
   

2 of 5

   
   

$2

   
   

11/07/2006

   
   

10 - 21 - 22 - 24 - 31

   

 

Line E

                                    
   

2 of 5

   
   

$2

   
   

11/20/2006

   
   

4 - 12 - 17 - 23 - 32

   
   

2 of 5

   
   

$2

   
   

11/14/2006

   
   

1 - 3 - 8 - 14 - 23

   
   

2 of 5

   
   

$2

   
   

11/08/2006

   
   

7 - 12 - 19 - 32 - 33

   

 

Total Wins on a $60.00 ticket: $35.00  58 %

 

Texas Two-Step

Texas Two-Step Ticket

 

 

Texas Two-Step

 

Line A:

               
   

of 4 w/Bonus

   
   

$5

   
   

11/20/2006

   
   

9 - 17 - 30 - 33

   
   

(27)

   

 

Line B:

No Wins

 

Line C:

No Wins

 

Line D:

No Wins

 

Line E:

No Wins.

 

Won $5.00 on a $60.00 Ticket    12%

 

Lotto Texas

Lotto Texas Ticket

 

I paid $50 for this ticket and won Zero Dollars  0%

 

Mega Millions Lottery Ticket

 

Mega Millions Lottery Ticket - Texas

 

 

Mega Millions.

 

Line A:  No Wins

Line B:  No Wins

Line C:  No Wins

Line D:

                                 
   

Matched

   
   

Prize

   
   

Date

   
   

Numbers Drawn

   
   

(Mega Ball)

   
   

2 of 5 w/Mega Ball

   
   

$10

   
   

11/28/2006

   
   

7 - 14 - 24 - 41 - 56

   
   

(7)

   
   

Megaplier 4X

   

 

Line E:

                                 
   

Matched

   
   

Prize

   
   

Date

   
   

Numbers Drawn

   
   

(Mega Ball)

   
   

0 of 5 w/Mega Ball

   
   

$2

   
   

12/08/2006

   
   

1 - 15 - 29 - 32 - 45

   
   

(8)

   
   

Megaplier 2X

   

 

Paid $50.00 for this ticket got back $12.00  24%

 

 So on $210 worth of tickets, I won a total of $52!  That is only 24%.  So this little test prove to be costly, but any number is a good number and I could have one any or all of these Jack Pots, that is the reason I play.  I want to win.

Now, I thought of another way to purchase tickets, and yesterday I purchase another $60.00 in Cash Five tickets.  Last night I won $11.00.  I got three of the five numbers.  That is good, and to think I have 11 more draws on this ticket.

I will let you know after the two weeks have past, and we will see I did better than the 24%.

 

Man Drinking

I hope you all have a very Merry Christmas 2006 and Happy New Year!

 

Entry #114
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December 24, 2006, 7:56 amLotto Texas Lottery Pool - Game One - 10th Update

No one won the Lotto Texas Lottery last night’s drawing (Saturday, December 23rd, 2006)

Here are the numbers from December 20th, 2006:

10 - 14 - 17 - 26 - 34 - 36

 

You’re Numbers:

                                                                        
   

Numbers for Lotto Texas

   
   

Dates Valid

   
   

Notes

   
   

04 13 18 24 27 40

   
   

11/25/06 -12/27/06

   
   

 

   
   

13 28 33 37 47 52

   
   

   
   

 

   
   

02 09 32 40 43 54

   
   

   
   

 

   
   

07 15 23 33 49 51

   
   

   
   

 

   
   

16 25 32 34 36 49

   
   

   
   

 

   
   

16 21 22 30 40 42

   
   

   
   

 

   
   

24 39 40 44 47 50

   
   

   
   

 

   

 

We have gone thru nine drawing without a single win.  I could not believe this!  We are not down to one more drawing in this game.

The next drawing is on Wednesday, December 27th, 2006, and it’s worth $16 Million.  The Cash Option is $9,700,000.00.

There are only 7 of us playing this game, and we all purchase equal shares, so each of us would get (before any attorney fees, taxes or tithes):

$1,385,714.28

Game Two will start on Saturday December 30th, 2006.  This will be my only game starting at the end of the year.

Die Hard Multi-Lottery Pool Game 12 will start on Monday, January 1st, 2007.  Then Mega Million Lottery Pool Game 30 will start on Tuesday January 2nd, 2007.

It’s not too late to join; I just need your money before Saturday, December 30th, 2006.

      
   

Today's Joke

   
                   
     

Have You Seen The Signs in The     Office?

     

1. In an     office:

     

TOILET OUT OF     ORDER......
     PLEASE USE FLOOR BELOW

     

2. In a     Laundromat:

     

AUTOMATIC WASHING     MACHINES: PLEASE REMOVE ALL YOUR CLOTHES WHEN THE LIGHT GOES OUT

     

3. In a London department store:

     

BARGAIN BASEMENT     UPSTAIRS

     

4. In an     office:

     

WOULD THE PERSON     WHO TOOK THE STEP LADDER YESTERDAY PLEASE BRING IT BACK OR
     . . .FURTHER STEPS WILL BE TAKEN

     

5. In an     office:

     

AFTER TEA BREAK     STAFF SHOULD EMPTY THE TEAPOT AND STAND UPSIDE DOWN ON THE DRAINING BOARD     

     

6. Outside a     secondhand shop:

     

WE EXCHANGE     ANYTHING - BICYCLES, WASHING MACHINES, ETC. WHY NOT BRING YOUR WIFE ALONG     AND GET A WONDERFUL BARGAIN?

     

7. Notice in     health food shop window:

     

CLOSED DUE TO     ILLNESS

     

8. Spotted in a     safari park:

     

ELEPHANTS PLEASE     STAY IN YOUR CAR

     

9. Seen during     a conference:

     

FOR ANYONE WHO HAS     CHILDREN AND DOESN'T KNOW IT, THERE IS A DAY CARE ON THE 1ST FLOOR

     

10. Notice in a     farmer's field:

     

THE FARMER ALLOWS     WALKERS TO CROSS THE FIELD FOR FREE, BUT THE BULL CHARGES.

     

11. On a repair     shop door:

     

WE CAN REPAIR     ANYTHING. (PLEASE KNOCK HARD ON THE DOOR - THE BELL DOESN'T WORK)We all need a     good laugh, keep on smiling

     
   

   
      
   

Today's Joke

   
                   
     

Have You Seen The Signs in The     Office?

     

1. In an     office:

     

TOILET OUT OF     ORDER......
     PLEASE USE FLOOR BELOW

     

2. In a     Laundromat:

     

AUTOMATIC WASHING     MACHINES: PLEASE REMOVE ALL YOUR CLOTHES WHEN THE LIGHT GOES OUT

     

3. In a London department store:

     

BARGAIN BASEMENT     UPSTAIRS

     

4. In an     office:

     

WOULD THE PERSON     WHO TOOK THE STEP LADDER YESTERDAY PLEASE BRING IT BACK OR
     . . .FURTHER STEPS WILL BE TAKEN

     

5. In an     office:

     

AFTER TEA BREAK     STAFF SHOULD EMPTY THE TEAPOT AND STAND UPSIDE DOWN ON THE DRAINING BOARD     

     

6. Outside a     secondhand shop:

     

WE EXCHANGE     ANYTHING - BICYCLES, WASHING MACHINES, ETC. WHY NOT BRING YOUR WIFE ALONG     AND GET A WONDERFUL BARGAIN?

     

7. Notice in     health food shop window:

     

CLOSED DUE TO     ILLNESS

     

8. Spotted in a     safari park:

     

ELEPHANTS PLEASE     STAY IN YOUR CAR

     

9. Seen during     a conference:

     

FOR ANYONE WHO HAS     CHILDREN AND DOESN'T KNOW IT, THERE IS A DAY CARE ON THE 1ST FLOOR

     

10. Notice in a     farmer's field:

     

THE FARMER ALLOWS     WALKERS TO CROSS THE FIELD FOR FREE, BUT THE BULL CHARGES.

     

11. On a repair     shop door:

     

WE CAN REPAIR     ANYTHING. (PLEASE KNOCK HARD ON THE DOOR - THE BELL DOESN'T WORK)We all need a     good laugh, keep on smiling

     
   

   

December 24, 2006, 7:27 amMega Million Lottery Pool Game 29 - 9th Update

MEGA MILLION LOTTERY POOL - GAME 29
 
      
   

Quote of the Day

   
                   
     

We     must believe in ourselves or no one else will believe in us; we must match     our aspirations with the competence, courage and determination to succeed.
     --Rosalyn Sussman Yalow

     
   

   
 
 

We won nothing in Tuesday’s drawing, and I’m sorry I had no chance to do any updates.

I worked on Friday, so I thought I would just wait until after that drawing before doing an update.

The numbers for last night’s drawing were:

5-12-15-25-34 MB: 43  MP: 4

 

 

Results for your numbers: 8 - 24 - 39 - 49 - 52 (43) How To Play Mega Millions

                                 
   

Matched

   
   

Prize

   
   

Date

   
   

Numbers Drawn

   
   

(Mega Ball)

   
   

0 of 5 w/Mega Ball

   
   

$2

   
   

12/22/2006

   
   

5 - 12 - 15 - 25 - 34

   
   

(43)

   
   

Megaplier 4X

   

 

So we won another $8.00 in last night’s drawing.  This brings up our total winnings to $78.00.

I spend your money today on more tickets.  You have 20 more lines for the day after Christmas drawing.  Most of your tickets will expire after that game.

Right now you have 84 lines with 1 more drawing to go.

After Tuesday December 26th, 2006, you will have 19 lines for Saturday December 29th, 2006.

The Mega Millions jackpot for the drawing on Tuesday, December 26th, 2006 is: $60 million ($35.6 million cash option)

I get my Cash Option from www.ohiolottery.com.  They tend to have the most accurate.  The Cash Option for Tuesday’s drawing is:

 $35,693,040

This game has 51 members, but I sold 64 shares ($640.00 in tickets) so I will divide Cash Option by 64 to get our payout.  Please remember this figure is before any attorney fees, taxes or tithes.

                                    
   

Numbers of Shares

   

Purchased

   
   

Your Share of winnings

   
   

.5

   
   

$   278,851.87

   
   

1

   
   

$   557,703.75

   
   

1.5

   
   

$   836,555.62

   
   

2

   
   

$ 1,115,407.50

   
   

4.5

   
   

$   2,509,666.87

   

Okay it’s down to the nitty-gritty.  This game will most likely win something the day after Christmas, but I most likely will spend any of your winnings on one draw for that Saturday.

I have been doing newsletters for Mega Million Lottery Pool Game 28 for two months, and they have played right along with you.  With Die Hard, Lotto Texas pools that means 4 newsletters at least twice a week.

I would like to start the New Year out fresh, the only new game I have starting this year is Lotto Texas Lottery Pool – Game Two, and he starts on Saturday December 30th, 2006.

As it is, I have lost members in my Die Hard Game, so I will have two clubs running from Jan 1, 2007 thru Jan 14th, 2007.

So this means anyone who wants to play in Mega Million Lottery Pool – Game 30 has until Saturday December 30th, 2006 to pay for their share(s) to be in the game.  

Please note:  I will NOT be working on Friday December 29th, or Saturday December 30th, 2006.  I was given jury duty starting on Friday December 29th, 2006.

So if you work for Citi, you should be paying now, or giving me a Post Dated check for Friday December 29th, 2006.

          
   

Today's Joke

   
                   
     

What I Want You To Know

     

Here is a classic     piece reminding you some of the important things in life.

     

* If you’re happy     and you know it clap your hands-it's the best way to make everybody laugh     especially if you’re in the middle of a class.

     

* Friends are the     best things that will ever happen to you. But that doesn't mean you have to     keep the same ones. People change, so do you...when that happens accept it     and move on. But don't forget to remember your old friends; they have     helped make your life what it is now.

     

* Siblings will     always be there for; they love even if they don't act like it.

     

* Never break a     fax machine-it will beep for three days straight.

     

* Parents are the     same, they'll yell and scream and shout because they want to help. They     also have feelings.

     

* Never try to     stay up the whole night and tell your friend that they can do anything to     wake you up if you fall asleep; especially if they have Ice tea in their     hand.

     

* If you smile     someone will smile back.

     

* If you dip pieces     of apple in apple juice it will taste really weird.

     

* There are people     that love you but just don't know how to show it.

     

* If you get hit     with a ball and you start crying everyone will walk over to see how you     are. If you're having a bad day but you're not crying only your best     friends will.

     

* The best feeling     in the world is to ride with the window down and to be singing along with a     song on the radio.

     

* Always remember     you're unique, just like everyone else.

     

* No one is     listening until you make a mistake.

     

* Duct tape is     like the force, it has a light side and a dark side and it holds the     universe together.

     

* Never mess up an     apology with an excuse.

     

* Normal people     are people you don't know.

     

* There is always     one teacher that everyone hates that never misses school.

     

* People may     forget what you said but they'll never forget how you made them feel.

     

* And finally,     being happy doesn't necessarily mean everything's perfect. It just means     you've decided to look beyond all of the imperfections.

     
   

   
 
 
 

 
Entry #112
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December 23, 2006, 8:41 pmMega Million Lottery Pool Game 28 - 18th Update

You won nothing in last Tuesday’s drawing or last night’s drawing. I did go to Kroger to double check our tickets.

No one won the Jack Pot in last night’s drawing so it’s going up.

The Mega Millions jackpot for the drawing on Tuesday, December 26th, 2006 is $60 million. I get the Cash Value from: www.ohiolotttery.com. The estimated cash value of this jackpot is $35,693,040.00.

 I take that figure and divide it by 60 (# of Shares).  Here is want you would get before any attorney fees, taxes or tithes:

 

                              
   

Number so Shares Purchased

   
   

Amount you Could Win

   
   

.5

   
   

$ 297,442.00

   
   

1

   
   

$ 594,884.00

   
   

1.5

   
   

$ 892,326.00

   
   

2

   
   

$1,189,768.00

   

 

I spend the $4.00 you had in your bank for what seems forever.  So for your final drawing you now have five lines.

Here are your numbers:

                                                      
   

Numbers

   
   

Mega Ball

   
   

Dates Valid

   
   

27 34 35 41 48

   
   

42

   
   

11/24/2006 thru 12/26/2006

   
   

05 06 13 40 52

   
   

17

   
   

11/24/2006 thru 12/26/2006

   
   

07 10 15 22 41

   
   

05

   
   

11/24/2006 thru 12/26/2006

   
   

06 22 34 39 56

   
   

04

   
   

12/26/2006  New Ticket

   
   

06 23 35 36 39

   
   

40

   
   

12/26/2006  New Ticket

   

 

Now you will need to win some in Tuesday’s Night’s drawing in order for me to extend this game.  Even if you don’t win, you have played for 2 months on your initial payment for the shares you purchase. 

Game 29 has already started and almost over with.  Their game was extended today to Friday December 29th, 2006.

There is still time to join Game 30, but you need to have your money to me no later than Saturday December 30th, 2006.

 

The Thimble

One day, when a seamstress was sewing while sitting close to a river, her thimble fell into the river.

When she cried out, the Lord appeared and asked, "My dear child, why are you crying?"


The seamstress replied that her thimble had fallen into the water and that she needed it to help her husband in making a living for their family.

The Lord dipped His hand into the water and pulled up a golden thimble set with pearls.

"Is this your thimble?" the Lord asked.

The seamstress replied, "No."

The Lord again dipped into the river.  He held out a silver thimble ringed with sapphires.

"Is this your thimble?" the Lord  asked.

Again, the seamstress replied, "No."

The Lord reached down again and came up with a leather thimble.

"Is this your thimble?" the Lord asked.

The seamstress replied, "Yes."

The Lord was pleased with the woman's honesty and gave her all three thimbles to keep, and the seamstress went home happy.

Some years later, the seamstress was walking with her husband along the riverbank, and her husband fell into the river and disappeared under the water.

When she cried out, the Lord again appeared and asked her, "Why are you crying?"

"Oh Lord, my husband has fallen into the river!"

The Lord went down into the water and came up with George Clooney.

"Is this your husband?" the Lord asked.

"Yes," cried the seamstress.

The Lord was furious. "You lied! That is an  untruth!"

The seamstress replied, "Oh, forgive me, my Lord.  It is a misunderstanding.  You see, if I had said 'no' to George Clooney, you would have come up with Brad Pitt.  Then if I said 'no' to him, you would have come up with my husband.  Had I then said 'yes,' you would have given me all three.  Lord, I'm not in the best of health and would not be able to take care of all three husbands, so THAT'S why I said 'yes' to George Clooney."

The  moral of this story is: Whenever a woman lies, it's for a good and honorable  reason, and in the best interest of others.

That's our story, and  we're sticking to it.

 

  Xmas Gift
Entry #111
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December 23, 2006, 11:54 amLotto Texas Lottery Pool - Game One - 9th Update

Man Drinking

No one won the Lotto Texas Lottery last Wednesday.

Here are the numbers from December 20th, 2006:

20-31-34-41-46-52

You’re Numbers:

                                                                        
   

Numbers for Lotto Texas

   
   

Dates Valid

   
   

Notes

   
   

04 13 18 24 27 40

   
   

11/25/06 -12/27/06

   
   

 

   
   

13 28 33 37 47 52

   
   

   
   

 

   
   

02 09 32 40 43 54

   
   

   
   

 

   
   

07 15 23 33 49 51

   
   

   
   

 

   
   

16 25 32 34 36 49

   
   

   
   

 

   
   

16 21 22 30 40 42

   
   

   
   

 

   
   

24 39 40 44 47 50

   
   

   
   

 

   

Can you believe we have gone thru 8 draws already?  And have won nothing.  We only have two more draws, tonight being one of them.

The next drawing is on Saturday, December 23rd, 2006, and it’s worth $15 Million.  The Cash Option is $9,000,000.00.

There are only 7 of us playing this game, and we all purchase equal shares, so each of us would get (before any attorney fees, taxes or tithes):

$1,285,714.28

We only have tonight’s drawing and then next Wednesday’s drawing.  Then Game Two will start on Saturday December 30th, 2006.  This will be my only game starting at the end of the year.

Die Hard Multi-Lottery Pool Game 12 will start on Monday, January 1st, 2007.  Then Mega Million Lottery Pool Game 30 will start on Tuesday January 2nd, 2007.

My advertising paid off, we have a new member joining us. Ms. Juanita Brown from Ohio sent me a check to be in Game Two.   

It’s not too late to join; I just need your money before Saturday, December 30th, 2006.

Lotto Texas Lottery Pool – Game Two

Start Date is Saturday, December 30th, 2006

 

                                                                                                                                                                                             
   

#

   
   

Name

   
   

Date

   
   

Paid

   
   

Shares

   
   

E-Mail

   
   

Notes

   
   

1

   
   

Michael E. Porter

   
   

11/30/2006

   
   

$10.00

   
   

1

   
   

Host

   
   

 

   
   

2.

   
   

Agnes N. Forson

   
   

11/30/2006

   
   

$10.00

   
   

1

   
   

Yes

   
   

 

   
   

3.

   
   

Charles W.  Rutherford

   
   

11/30/2006

   
   

$10.00

   
   

1

   
   

Yes

   
   

 

   
   

4.

   
   

Libra/Goat (Anonymous)

   
   

11/30/2006

   
   

$10.00

   
   

1

   
   

Yes

   
   

 

   
   

5.

   
   

Tambra L. Caro

   
   

12/06/2006

   
   

$10.00

   
   

1

   
   

Yes

   
   

 

   
   

6.

   
   

Anthony W. Bolden

   
   

12/06/2006

   
   

$10.00

   
   

1

   
   

Yes

   
   

 

   
   

7.

   
   

Juanita Brown

   
   

12/21/2006

   
   

$10.00

   
   

1

   
   

Yes

   
   

New

   
   

Total

   
   

7  Members

   
   

 

   
   

70.00

   
   

7

   
   

 

   
   

 

   

 

 

      
   
                   
     

TRUE(TM)     
     5215 North O'Connor,
Suite 1600
     
Irving, TX 75039
     866-583-8783

     
   
   

   
                                
     

Jokemaster's Note

     
                             
       

Rex       Barker here again with “Beautiful Women”.

       

Age 3: She looks       at herself and sees a Queen.

       

Age 8: She looks       at herself and sees Cinderella.

       

Age 15: She       looks at herself and sees an Ugly Sister (Mom, I can't go to school       looking like this!) Too short/too tall, too straight/too curly"...       but decides she's going out anyway.

       

Age 30: She       looks at herself and sees "too fat/too thin, too short/too tall, too       straight/too curly" ... but decides she doesn't have time to fix it.       

       

Age 40: She       looks at herself and sees "clean" and goes out anyway.

       

Age 50: She       looks at herself and sees "I am" and goes wherever she wants to       go.

       

Age 60: She       looks at herself and reminds herself of all the people who can't even see       themselves in the mirror anymore... then goes out and conquers the world.       

       

Age 70: She       looks at herself and sees wisdom, laughter and Ability... goes out and       enjoys life.

       

Age 80: Doesn't       bother to look….just puts on a purple hat and goes out to have fun with       the world.

       

This is Rex       Barker C.S. (Celebrating Seniors) saying maybe the phenomenal women in       our lives should all grab that “purple hat” earlier!

       
     

     
   

   

 

All of you please have a Merry Christmas!  - Michael

 

December 17, 2006, 4:18 pmLotto Texas Lottery Pool - Game Two - Starting

Lotto Texas Lottery Pool
Game Two
 
Christmas Lights
 
If you would like to be in my next Lotto Texas Lottery Pool, the cost is only $10.00 per share. I purchase Cash Option tickets for 10 draws.  Each Game in Lotto Texas Lottery Pool runs for 1 month.  If we win, we can play longer.
 
The Start date for this game is Saturday December 30th, 2006.
 
Just be sure to send me $10.00 at:
 
Mr. Michael E. Porter
Lotto Texas Lottery Pool - Game Two
Post Office Box 191702
Dallas, Texas 75219-8505
 
You must have e-mail, so you can get copies of your tickets and the newsletters that I send out.  
 
If you would rather pay by PayPall, I have an account.  If you will e-mail me at  meporter@myway.com I can invoice you.
 
 
Chritmas Lights
 
 
 
 
 
Entry #109
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December 17, 2006, 4:02 pmDie Hard Multi-Lottery Pool - Game XI - 8th Update

Getting Older

I thought you would enjoy the following interview: In April, Maya Angelou was interviewed by Oprah on her 70+ birthday.

Oprah asked her what she thought of growing older.

 And, there on television, she said it was "exciting." Regarding body changes, she said there were many, occurring every day...like her breasts.

They seem to be in a race to see which will reach her waist, first. The audience laughed so hard they cried. She is such a simple and honest woman, with so much wisdom in her words!

Maya Angelou said this: I've learned that no matter what happens, or how bad it seems today, life does go on, and it will be better tomorrow."

"I've learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way he/she handles these three things: a rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights."

 "I've learned that regardless of your relationship with your parents, you'll miss them when they're gone from your life."

 "I've learned that making a 'living' is not the same thing as 'making a                            life'."

 "I've learned that life sometimes gives you a second chance."

 “I've learned that you shouldn't go through life with a catcher's mitt on both hands; you need to be able to throw some things back."

 

 

 

 "I've learned that whenever I decide something with an open heart, I                    usually make the right decision."

 "I've learned that even when I have pains, I don't have to be one."

"I've learned that every day you should reach out and touch someone. People love a warm hug, or just a friendly pat on the back."

"I've learned that I still have a lot to learn."

"I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel."

If you do, something good will happen: You will boost another person’s                           self-esteem.

If you don't...the elastic will break and your underpants will fall down around your ankles! ;-) Believe me, I didn't take any chances on MY elastic breaking....I sent it to a lot of special people I care for.

God writes straight with crooked lines.

- - Spanish Proverb

Mega Millions

We do have three numbers until Tuesday December 26th, 2006.  Now we won nothing. 

Your numbers:

                                                            
   

Numbers

   
   

Mega Ball

   
   

Dates Valid

   
   

Notes

   
   

16 18 45 52 54

   
   

15

   
   

11/24/0612/26/06

   
   

 

   
   

09 13 21 34 54

   
   

18

   
   

11/24/0612/26/06

   
   

 

   
   

09 14 19 35 54

   
   

46

   
   

11/24/0612/26/06

   
   

 

   
   

 

   
   

 

   
   

 

   
   

 

   

 

The Jack Pot is now at $40 Million.

The estimated cash value of this jackpot is $23,923,440

16 divided by $23,923,440 = $1,495,215.00 for each of us.  This is before any attorney fee’s, taxes or tithes.

We only have four more draws in this game.

Kansas Hot Lotto
Power Ball

Power Ball

We have won nothing in this game, and it’s this game we have the most tickets.

Your Numbers:

                                                                                          
   

Power Ball Numbers

   
   

PowerBall

   
   

Dates Valid

   
   

State Issued

   
   

Notes

   
   

07 29 38 46 53

   
   

29

   
   

11/25/06 – 01/13/07

   
   

Kansas

   
   

 

   
   

08 13 27 39 50

   
   

04

   
   

11/25/06 – 01/13/07

   
   

Kansas

   
   

 

   
   

03 16 19 29 51

   
   

28

   
   

11/29/06 – 01/17/07

   
   

Missouri

   
   

 

   
   

02 10 29 36 54

   
   

30

   
   

11/29/06 – 01/17/07

   
   

Missouri

   
   

 

   
   

11 12 17 24 49

   
   

33

   
   

01/29/06 – 01/17/07

   
   

Missouri

   
   

 

   

 

The New Jack Pot for Wednesday, December 20th, 2006 is worth $53 Million, the Cash Option is worth $25,900,000.00.

There are 16 of us playing in this game, so that means each of us would get $1,618,750.00.  This is before any attorney fee’s, taxes or tithes.

 

Other Information

I will be starting Die Hard Multi-Lottery Pool on Monday January 1st, 2006.  If you have paid for your November and December dues by the 31st of December, then you will be in Die Hard XII

Now if you have only paid for November, then you money will be transferred to the Next Mega Million Game (Game 30). 

So the bad news is we will be losing a lot of members in this game.  There is more bad news. I can’t find anyone to supply us with Hot Lotto Tickets.  So this may be our last game with Hot Lotto Tickets.

Now, I will NOT be in the office on Friday December 29th, 2006.  I had scheduled myself to work that day to give everyone the chance to pay me to be in the next game.  But, I have jury duty starting that day and am scheduled to be in Jury Duty until January 12th, 2006.

So if you work for Citi, and you want to play in this next game, you will need to have your money to me before Friday December 29th, 2006.  You can mail me a check if you want, but I need to receive in my Post Office Box by Saturday December 30th, 2006.

Your $10.00 is due on or before Sunday December 31st, 2006

 

   

http://fun.from.berdyczow.org/2004-05-26/posmeraj-goscia-w-nos.swf

 
 

 DEAR ANN LANDERS:
 
I loved the letters you printed about misinterpreting
the Lord's Prayer. When my twin daughters were young,
I taught them to say this prayer before going to bed.
As I listened outside their door, I could hear them say,
"Give us this steak and daily bread, and forgive us our
mattresses." My husband and I always had a good laugh
over this. That was over 50 years ago, and the memory
still remains in my heart.
 
From
San Francisco: When I was a child,
I learned this prayer as "Our Father, who are in Heaven,
Howard be thy name." I always thought that was God's real name.

Groton, Mass. My mother spent her early childhood saying,
"Hail Mary, full of grapes."
 
Missoula, Mont. My son, who is in nursery school, said,
"Our Father, who art in Heaven, how didja know my name?"
 
Uniontown, Ohio I remember thinking this prayer was
"Give us this day our jelly bread."
 
Covina, Calif. I recall reading something years ago
about the Pledge of Allegiance. Some child thought it began,
"I led the pigeons to the flag."
 
Cleveland, Ohio When I was little, I often wondered who Richard Stands was. You know: 

  "I pledge allegiance to the flag . . 
and to the republic for Richard Stands."
 
Schenectady, NY I once knew a child whose favorite Sunday school song was  

 "Gladly, the Cross-Eyed Bear." (gladly the Cross I Bear).
 
Tampa, Fla. When my husband was 6 years old, he thought
a certain prayer was "He suffered under a bunch of violets."
The real words were "under Pontius Pilate," but at that age,
he didn't know better. To this day, we still snicker
in church whenever that prayer is read.
 
Lake Forest Park, Wash. When I was a little girl,
we sang a song in Sunday school about Noah.
Part of the chorus was "And the rains came down,
and the floods came up." We lived next door
to a couple of charming little girls who always sang
this song while playing in their garden. Their words
were, "And the rains came down, and the spuds came up."
 
Oak Harbor, Wash. When my older brother was very young,
he always walked up to the church altar with my mother
when she took communion. On one occasion, he tugged
at her arm and asked, "What does the priest say
when he gives you the bread?" Mom whispered something
in his ear. Imagine his shock many years later
when he learned that the priest doesn't say,
"Be quiet until you get to your seat."

Grand Junction, Colo. When I was younger,
I believed the line was "Lead a snot into temptation."
I thought I was praying for my little sister to get into trouble 

 

 
Entry #108
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December 17, 2006, 2:00 pmLotto Texas Lottery Pool - Game One - 8th Update

No one won the Lotto Texas Lottery last night, so it’s going up.

Here are the numbers from December 16th, 2006:

3-4-6-20-22-41

You’re Numbers:

                                                                        
   

Numbers for Lotto Texas

   
   

Dates Valid

   
   

Notes

   
   

04 13 18 24 27 40

   
   

11/25/06 -12/27/06

   
   

 

   
   

13 28 33 37 47 52

   
   

   
   

 

   
   

02 09 32 40 43 54

   
   

   
   

 

   
   

07 15 23 33 49 51

   
   

   
   

 

   
   

16 25 32 34 36 49

   
   

   
   

 

   
   

16 21 22 30 40 42

   
   

   
   

 

   
   

24 39 40 44 47 50

   
   

   
   

 

   

 

The next drawing is on Wednesday, December 20th, 2006, and it’s worth $14 Million.  The Cash Option is $8,400,000.00.

There are only 7 of us playing this game, and we all purchase equal shares, so each of us would get (before any attorney fees, taxes or tithes):

$1,200,000.00

Now I must have done something wrong in my last update.  This pay out is lower than the one in the last newsletter.  But, I did double check this figure three times.

In last Sunday’s paper, I was reading the Parade Magazine.  In it there is a column called “Ask Marilyn.”  I always read her article because it seems she always has interesting questions.  This one caught my eye:

 

From the Parade magazine, in the ask Marilyn article, (www.parade.com) I ran across this:

 

You said it doesn’t matter if I keep the same lottery numbers every time or change them—the chances of winning are the same. Does this mean that if I choose the numbers 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 and 6, my chances are just as good as anyone else’s?
—Dennis Locke,
Greenville, Tex.

Yes, they are. This may help put the odds against winning in better perspective.

 

 

This proofs true in this Saturday’s drawing.  See below:

Results for your numbers: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 How To Play Lotto Texas

 

                        
   

Matched

   
   

Prize

   
   

Date

   
   

Numbers Drawn

   
   

3 of 5

   
   

$3

   
   

12/16/2006

   
   

3 - 4 - 6 - 20 - 22 - 41

   

Please verify that the winning draw date matches the drawing date on your ticket.

All I would have done is marked 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6 on our play slip and we would have gotten $3.00.

I don’t know if Lotto Texas Lottery Pool = Game Two will be big enough for me to try this method, but I am thinking of using it in Mega Millions Game 30.

Let’s think about this, I had $70.00 in this game to spend, and we will assume that I will have $70 or more to spend in Game Two. 

Lotto Texas has 56 numbers, there are 6 numbers in each line, so I will divide 56 divided by 6 = $9.33.  Okay, so basically one would need $100.00 to spend to cover every number in the game.

Okay maybe I could do that.  All I would need to do is get three more members or get three people buy another share.

I should have a bonus on my last check, maybe I will just purchase three extra shares.

Speaking of Game Two, my only member who has paid will not be able to pay me until Friday, December 29th, 2006.  So my plan to extend this game will not happen.

I assume that everything happens for a reason, so maybe God wanted the Jack Pot to be bigger or more people to be playing.

In all of 2006 this Jack Pot has never gotten up beyond $36 Million.  In checking the web site I see one person winning this at $26 Million.  So we can say we will have a winner here in Texas between $26 Million and $36 Million.

 
 

Jamaican Sandals

 

A married couple was on holiday in Jamaica. They were touring around the marketplace looking at the goods and such when they passed this small sandal shop. From inside they heard the shopkeeper with a Jamaican accent say,” You foreigners! Come in. Come into my humble shop! “

 

So the married couple walked in. The Jamaican said to them, "I have some special sandals I think   you would be interested in. Dey makes you wild at sex. " Well, the wife was really interested in buying the sandals after what the man claimed, but her husband felt he really didn't need them, being the sex God he was.

 

The husband asked the man, "How could sandals make you into a sex freak?  "The Jamaican replied, "Just try dem on, Mon." Well, the husband, after some badgering from his wife, finally gave in, and tried them on.

 

As soon as he slipped them onto his feet, he got this wild look in his eyes... Something his wife hadn't seen in many years! In the blink of an eye, the husband  grabbed the Jamaican, bent him violently over a table, yanked down his  pants, ripped down his own pants, and grabbed a firm hold of he Jamaican's  hips. The Jamaican then began screaming, "YOU GOT DEM ON DE WRONG FEET"!

 

 

Entry #107
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December 16, 2006, 8:51 pmMega Million Lottery Pool Game 29 - 8th Update

This morning I slept late.  When I did get up, I checked my e-mail from www.megamillions.com and found

   
      
   

Mega Millions   Winning Numbers for 12/15/2006 are:

   
   

6 - 7 - 17 - 28 - 40  Mega Ball: 39  Megaplier: 3

   
 

I didn’t realize that we had the Mega Ball 39.  So I thought we had won nothing (again).  When I when to Kroger I was surprised that we won $30.00!

   
                                                   
   

Matched

   
   

Prize

   
   

Date

   
   

Numbers Drawn

   
   

(Mega Ball)

   
   

1 of 5 w/Mega Ball

   
   

$3

   
   

12/15/2006

   
   

6 - 7 - 17 - 28 - 40

   
   

(39)

   
   

Megaplier 3X

   
   

3 of 5

   
   

$7

   
   

12/15/2006

   
   

6 - 7 - 17 - 28 - 40

   
   

(39)

   
   

Megaplier 3X

   
 
 

We won a total of $10.00, with the Mega Ball being 3 we now had $30.00!  I was overjoyed. 

This game now has won more than Game 28.  You are already up to $70.00!

Right now you have 64 lines with 3 more draws to go.

The Mega Millions jackpot for the drawing on Tuesday, December 18th, 2006 is: $40 million ($23.9 million cash option)

I get my Cash Option from www.ohiolottery.com.  They tend to have the most accurate.  The Cash Option for Tuesday’s drawing is:

$23,923,440.00

This game has 51 members, but I sold 64 shares ($640.00 in tickets) so I will divide Cash Option by 64 to get our payout.  Please remember this figure is before any attorney fees, taxes or tithes.

                                    
   

Numbers of Shares

   

Purchased

   
   

Your Share of winnings

   
   

.5

   
   

$   186,901.87

   
   

1

   
   

$   373,803.75

   
   

1.5

   
   

$   560,705.62

   
   

2

   
   

$ 747,607.50

   
   

4.5

   
   

$   1,682,116.87

   

 

We are down to three more draws in this game.  You have $70.00 in your bank right now, so this game will be extended beyond the December 26th date you have now. 

I don’t know how long I will extend this game, because you know that Game 28 has been playing right along with you.  I have to do a newsletter for Mega Game 28, Mega Game 29, Die Hard Multi-Lottery Pool Game XI, and Lotto Texas Lottery Pool Game One.  That is four newsletters and I’m tired.  So I know that your game will be extended, but right now I don’t know how long.

Because I have new members, I must start Mega Million Lottery Pool Game 30 on Tuesday January 2nd, 2007.

So this means anyone who wants to play in Mega Million Lottery Pool – Game 30 has until Saturday December 30th, 2006 to pay for their share(s) to be in the game.  

Please note:  I will NOT be working on Friday December 29th, or Saturday December 30th, 2006.  I was given jury duty starting on Friday December 29th, 2006.

So if you work for Citi, you should be paying now, or giving me a Post Dated check for Friday December 29th, 2006.

   

An idea for newlyweds

 On their wedding night, the young bride approached her new husband and asked for $20, for their first lovemaking encounter. In his highly aroused state, her husband readily agreed. This scenario was repeated each time they made love, for the next 30 years, with him thinking that it was a cute way for her to afford new clothes and other incidentals that she needed.

Arriving home around noon one day, she was surprised to find her husband in a very drunken state: Over the next few minutes, he explained That his company had gone through a process of corporate downsizing, and he had been let go - It was unlikely that at the age of 55, he'd be able to find another position that paid anywhere near what he'd been earning, and therefore, they were financially ruined. Calmly, his wife handed him a bank book which showed thirty years of deposits and interest totaling nearly $ 1 million. Then, she showed him stock certificates issued by the bank which were worth over $ 2 million, and informed him that they were the largest stockholders in the bank. She explained that for 30 years, she had charged him for sex and these holdings were the results of her savings and investments. Faced with evidence of cash and investments worth over $ 3 million, her husband was so astounded he could barely speak, but finally he found his voice and blurted out "If I'd had any idea what you were doing, I would have given you all my business ".  You know, sometimes men just don't know when to keep their mouths shut.....

 
Cows wanting us to eat more Chili
Entry #106
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